Names on invitations.

smscully · October 2009

I really don't like the Mr and Mrs Robert Smith for addressing invitations. I don't want to be known or addressed as Mrs Robby Miller, I am going to take his last name but I do have a separate identity. Does any one have any suggestions on how to word the addresses on the outer envelope (only envelope) to include the wife's name? This is what i have come up withMr Thomas and Mrs Kathleen LastNameOrThomas and Kathleen LastNameIs there anything i am not thinking of?

ggmae · October 2009

I addressed the invites like:Mr. & Mrs. John and Jane Doe.I think it looks fine, but some people say it looks like it's "Mrs. John." Whatever though - it was important to me that all names be on the invites, in full.

Soon-to-be Mrs. Vogt · October 2009

How formal do you want it? If it's formal, you should use titles (Mr. Mrs. Ms. Dr., etc.) If more casual, going without titles is fine.If you want to use titles, I would use Mr. & Mrs. Thomas and Kathleen LastName. Personally I think the two "ands" are redundant and unnecessary.I'm also not the type of person who gets a sense of individuality from an envelope. I'm proud to be addressed as Mrs. Hisname Vogt and don't feel as though I'm not a person just because I'm his wife and may be addressed by his name in formal print. Sorry, stepping off my soapbox now

tenofcups4me · October 2009

I prefer Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith. But our envelopes were tall and narrow and that didn't work well, so my first wedding we did: Mr. John Smith and Mrs. Jane Smith OR Mrs. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith depending on which of the couple we knew better. If you go with just first names, the "rule" is that women goes first, but personally I follow my own rule of addressing first the person who I know better.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · October 2009

Technically, your formal name IS Mrs. Robby Smith if you take his last name. I hate to break it to you, but that's a big reason why there was a push in the 60s and 70s for women to keep their own names or hyphenate. Because of the identity issue. It's still a reason many women keep their name.You could also address it to "The Smith Family" so long as you are inviting both the couple and any children they have.

MsGamblingGirl · October 2009

It's actually improper etiquette to split a man's first and last name (ie it's wrong to write Thomas and Kathleen LastName). The woman's name must always come first. In your example you should put Kathleen and Thomas Lastname

Leah&Christian09 · October 2009

We did Mr. and Mrs. Thomas and Kathleen Lastname. I think Crane's said it should be Mr. and Mrs. Kathleen and Thomas, but that sounded stupid to me.

cjohnsen2010 · October 2009

I think that's the reason for the inner envelope (more personal). If you only have 1 envelope, it should be Mr. and Mrs. Smith.

brookelynpaisley · October 2009

Sorry, but technically, you ARE Mrs. Hisfirst Hislast. "Mrs." means "wife of." To say Mrs. Yourfirst hislast means you're married to yourself. I get that you don't like the "loss" of your identity, but some wives don't mind. I don't think you should based your addressing on how you personally feel. I addressed mine the old fashioned way unless I knew for sure a wife had an issue being Mrs. Hisname. That being said, use Mrs. and Mrs. Kathleen and John Smith if you're going to use two names, since the man's names shouldn't be separated. Or, go with Kathleen and John Smith if you're not having a very formal wedding.

Calypso1977 · October 2009

many today do Mr. and Mrs. Thomas and Kathleen Jones, but it isnt proper.i agree with others. if you took your husbands name, then you agreed to be referred to as Mrs. Thomas Jones. HOWEVER, i do agree that mail dressed singly (meaning, if you wre just inviting the woman) would be better addressed to Ms. Kathleen Jones rather than Mrs. Thomas Jones. I would only go by Mrs. Thomas Jones if you were addressing it to both, as in Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones.

niq24601 · October 2009

This being the 21st century, people will get by no matter what you do. Right now our template has them on separate lines, top-right bottom-left Ms Jane DoeMr. John Doe 1101 Some Street Anytown, USA, 00000-0000If the spaces don't show up correctly, the name on the top is indented to the right of the address and zip lines, and the name on the second line is indented to the left. This is a common way that TV shows deal with the question of who gets "top billing" ... e.g. Ted Danson or Kirstie Alley on Cheers.

brookelynpaisley · October 2009

niq, your template is incorrect. Putting the names on separate lines indicates that they're not married at all.

tenofcups4me · October 2009

Brooklyn, it's not true that the names on two different lines mean they're not married, although they should be connected with an "and" if you're going to follow Cranes-style etiquette. It's also not true that Mrs. means "wife of." It's the abbreviation for Mistress. There's no good reason why a woman can't be Mrs. Jane Doe, except that someone eons ago said she couldn't. To me, that's not a good enough reason.

Names on invitations.

Re: Names on invitations.

Choose Another Board

Search Boards