Asking friend for buddy pass

msubiria · December 2011

I have a friend who works for Delta. My husband and I are under a budget for our religous wedding. How do appropriately ask him if he could reserve us buddy passes for our honeymoon, which would be our wedding gift if he would like?

Just don't want to offend him or be off line. He is a cool person, but I just want to know what would be the appropriate way to ask a close friend for something like this.

Thanks.

MJ

Beachy730 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-friend-buddy-pass?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c75388ff-90bb-4d9b-94b9-1c35ec9bc645Post:5db1be8a-b219-49ac-8d98-b0e100838d1d">Asking friend for buddy pass</a>:
[QUOTE]I have a friend who works for Delta. My husband and I are under a budget for our religous wedding. How do appropriately ask him if he could reserve us buddy passes for our honeymoon, which would be our wedding gift if he would like? Just don't want to offend him or be off line. He is a cool person, but I just want to know what would be the appropriate way to ask a close friend for something like this. Thanks. MJ
Posted by msubiria[/QUOTE]

<div>You don't. Most weddings are under a budget, and many times people skimp on the honeymoon to make up for it. If you can't afford the honeymoon you want right now, wait to take it, or go on a more local trip. </div>

KellyBrian2013 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-friend-buddy-pass?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c75388ff-90bb-4d9b-94b9-1c35ec9bc645Post:5db1be8a-b219-49ac-8d98-b0e100838d1d">Asking friend for buddy pass</a>:
[QUOTE]I have a friend who works for Delta. My husband and I are under a budget for our religous wedding. How do appropriately ask him if he could reserve us buddy passes for our honeymoon, which would be our wedding gift if he would like? Just don't want to offend him or be off line. He is a cool person, but I just want to know what would be the appropriate way to ask a close friend for something like this. Thanks. MJ
Posted by msubiria[/QUOTE]

You don't.

If he wants to give you "buddy passes" as your wedding gift, he will.

Otherwise, plan the wedding and honeymoon you can afford on your own (without soliciting "donations" from friends, family, or otherwise).

[Deleted User] · December 2011

Wait. What? How does the religiosity of your wedding pertain to the question?

ILoveToRobot · December 2011

Don't ask him for the buddy passes and say they can be his gift. Gifts are not mandatory. You should instead ask if it would be possible to purchase the buddy passes and ask how much he would charge. If he wants to gift them to you so be it.

[Deleted User] · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-friend-buddy-pass?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c75388ff-90bb-4d9b-94b9-1c35ec9bc645Post:6ac35d4e-13cd-42b5-9abc-1b29eaa0a41c">Re: Asking friend for buddy pass</a>:
[QUOTE]Wait. What? How does the religiosity of your wedding pertain to the question?
Posted by daffodil_jill[/QUOTE]

Because Jesus invented the buddy pass. And planes. Jesus invented planes.

WildRumpus · December 2011

Don't ask. Like others have said, either take the honeymoon you can afford right now, or wait, save up, and take a great vacation for your first anniversary. Have you checked places like Living Social or Groupon for their escape deals? Sometimes you can get ridiculously good deals on travel-like less than $600 for 2 people for a week in Mexico. Another suggestion...check out VRBO. You can get some great rental houses for a few days or a week in tons of locations.

erollis · December 2011

Not sure how Delta's buddy pass system works. H works for an airline and they state they are supposed to give passes to only people they know. They can not be sold for profit. These passes are standby only so there is no guarantee that one will get on the plane. These passes cost H about $100 each, one way. If the person wanted to reimburse him they can.

If the friend has offered in the past the use of buddy passes at any time you could ask if his offer still stands. He says no drop the subject. H offers to our family and friends if they ever need a pass they are there for them. If he has never offered the passes to you do not go asking for a handout.

Loopyseven · December 2011

Yeah, you can't ask. If he wants to, he will offer. Plan the wedding and honeymoon you can afford.

And what does religion have to do with your wedding?

[Deleted User] · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-friend-buddy-pass?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c75388ff-90bb-4d9b-94b9-1c35ec9bc645Post:f06fa8db-b151-4535-a43a-b15afe8a20f1">Re: Asking friend for buddy pass</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Asking friend for buddy pass : Because Jesus invented the buddy pass. And planes. Jesus invented planes.
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]
Oh yeah. I forgot.

Starfish0116 · December 2011

Don't ask.

My brother is an airline pilot, and he's VERY selective about who (even out of his close friends) he will use a buddy pass on. When flying on a buddy pass you are a direct representation of the employee and while we all like to think our friends would never behave in a way that would embarrass us or cause a scene...you just never know. Because of that, it's rare that he ever lets anyone (aside from me) use them.

Like someone else mentioned, buddy passes are standby only and do not guarantee you a seat on the flight you book. If they have a full paying passenger, you get bumped.

RaptorSLH · December 2011

If he asks what a good wedding gift would be, I think you could suggest it. But I would never tell anyone what they should get me without them offering first. The fact that you want to use his resources to pay for your honeymoon makes it worse. It is not his responsability to finance for your honeymoon, or your wedding. We're all on budgets.

lyndausvi · December 2011

If he is the friend that has told you "any time you need a pass let me know" then I would ask. If he has not done such a thing I would never pursue that avenue.

That said, unless you have a very flexible schedule and can afford a hotel for an extra say.. 3 days I would NOT use a buddy pass. They sound really good on paper, but if you want a popular route (think typical HM locations) you might find your HM might be shortend by a few day or worse for your bank account extended for days.

I've know people to have to take an extra 3 days to get home on a buddy pass. They were retired and had money so it was fine. As a budget bride for religious reasons (btw what does that even mean??)

NOLAbridealmost · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_asking-friend-buddy-pass?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c75388ff-90bb-4d9b-94b9-1c35ec9bc645Post:7db45025-bb20-4e00-aa1b-49bcd03b7d4f">Re: Asking friend for buddy pass</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Asking friend for buddy pass : This makes me think that they're already married and having some sort of religious ceremony. I'm not going to call it a redo or PPD, but that's what it seems like to me.
Posted by EaglesBride2012[/QUOTE]

<div>WHOA. How did we all miss that. </div>

Asking friend for buddy pass

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