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Escort Card Etiquette

momo2210momo2210
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in Wedding Etiquette Forum

Can someone confirm the basic etiquette for Escort cards for me? I tried to search this topic but didn't find much.

Do you use formal titles?  

For an unmarried couple do you put the female or male first?  Does this change depending on who was the invited Guest and who is brought as a Guest?

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Re: Escort Card Etiquette

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    ADTonkADTonk
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    Each person gets their own escort card.  You need to find out names of guests prior to the wedding and use formal titles as you would for invitations.
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    jessicabessicajessicabessica member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited May 2011
    I don't know that there's any dos or don'ts on this, as long as you write peoples names (no "and guests" on escort cards).  I would use formal titles if that's the feel of your event, but if you are going for a more casual feel, Jane and John Smith is fine, as long as you're consistent on all your cards. 

    I think technically you're supposed to put women first (I'm assuming you're asking about a couple where they have different last names), but I think we will probably put the person we're closer to first, which is how we addressed our invitations.

    edited (silly grammar)
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    mica178mica178 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    It depends on the formality of your wedding whether you use titles or just everyone's given name.

    You can either do individual escort cards or put people with their dates/significant other on the same card.  I couldn't fit everything onto one card, so I did everyone's separately.  If you do put people on the same card, ladies should go first.  (Of course, if you're doing titles, then it'd be Mr. and Mrs. John Doe, but it'd be Ms. Jane Smith and Mr. John Doe if the lady kept her maiden name.)
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    amys325amys325 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_escort-card-etiquette-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e2ea7551-922a-4344-8bdd-2b5f934fd8a5Post:f4fc03ce-901a-47cd-b007-7fdd1b4a15a6">Escort Card Etiquette</a>:
    [QUOTE]Can someone confirm the basic etiquette for Escort cards for me? I tried to search this topic but didn't find much. Do you use formal titles?   <strong>For an unmarried couple do you put the female or male first?</strong>  Does this change depending on who was the invited Guest and who is brought as a Guest?
    Posted by momo2210[/QUOTE]

    I read that you put whoever is your closer friend first.  So if Jane Doe and John Ex are dating and coming to my wedding together, but Jane Doe is my friend and John Ex is just her BF, then you put Jane first. 
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    tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    I usually see escort cards per couple, not per person. Sometimes people do them per person if they need to specify a meal choice, but I don't think I've personally seen that.

    Typically you would do them to match the formality of your wedding. I didn't do that, however, the first time I got married. My wedding was formal, but I didn't think the calligrapher could fit Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith easily on the small cards (I don't ever use Mr. and Mrs. John Smith). So we went with Jane and John Smith, no titles. It certainly didn't affect the formality of the wedding.

    For unmarried couples, the general "rule" is women first. But again, that's not a rule I followed. We put the name first of the person we'd actually invited, whether that was the man or woman, and then their guest second.
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    momo2210momo2210
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    Amys... that was going to be my next question! 

    For a GM who is bringing his Fiance, do you still put her first? We are friends with both of them but does the GM's name take priority since he is in the wedding party?
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    TurtlesAllTheWayDownTurtlesAllTheWayDown member
    First Comment Combo Breaker First Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_escort-card-etiquette-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e2ea7551-922a-4344-8bdd-2b5f934fd8a5Post:78710446-15cb-49ed-b04a-d04f09eb8508">Re: Escort Card Etiquette</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Escort Card Etiquette : I read that you put whoever is your closer friend first.  So if Jane Doe and John Ex are dating and coming to my wedding together, but Jane Doe is my friend and John Ex is just her BF, then you put Jane first. 
    Posted by amys325[/QUOTE]

    No, it's ladies first. But really, it's not a huge deal.
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    momo2210momo2210
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_escort-card-etiquette-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e2ea7551-922a-4344-8bdd-2b5f934fd8a5Post:9f56105e-3063-41e5-8838-fc539b6bfb96">Re: Escort Card Etiquette</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Escort Card Etiquette : No, it's ladies first. But really, it's not a huge deal.
    Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

    And then do you put them in alphabetical order according to the first name listed?
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    naomikbnaomikb member
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    We will be having couples on each card since they will be sitting together anyways, it cuts the number of cards I need to make in half.

    We are not using formal titles on the cards.  We are also not using formal titles on the invitations.

    The woman's name is going first.
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    Karen's MOHKaren's MOH
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    I had a lot of the same questions, and I'm not 100% sure I did it correctly, but everyone found their seats!

    I did couples on one card, formal titles. For unmarried couples, if we were friends with both, I did ladies first. If we were clearly closer with one (like, a groomsman) we put him first. It was alphabetized by last name of the first person listeed.

    I had two cases where people brought a friend or daughter because their original partner couldn't make it, so for those, since they weren't 'couples' I gave them each their own.
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    LuluP82LuluP82 member
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    I did one per person, since our specified entree choice (just had color coded ribbons in our decor colors to indicate which entree was which tied to the top).

    We did formal titles, because it was a formal party, and with just one name, well, it wasn't hard to fit.
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    allyson+williamsallyson+williams member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_escort-card-etiquette-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e2ea7551-922a-4344-8bdd-2b5f934fd8a5Post:c934872a-a765-485f-9fb6-221496e27fb4">Re: Escort Card Etiquette</a>:
    [QUOTE]We will be having couples on each card since they will be sitting together anyways, it cuts the number of cards I need to make in half. We are not using formal titles on the cards.  We are also not using formal titles on the invitations. The woman's name is going first.
    Posted by naomikb[/QUOTE]

    Me too.
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