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Cat:Wedding Boards
Home Buying Fund Registry?
Registering and Gifts
Home Buying Fund Registry?
Should you register? (The answer is a collective “YES!”) Chat about when, where, and what to register for here.
Are there any registries that allow your guest to contribute to buying a home? 
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Registering and Gifts
Home Buying Fund Registry?
Should you register? (The answer is a collective “YES!”) Chat about when, where, and what to register for here.
Are there any registries that allow your guest to contribute to buying a home? 
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Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:34
Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:34Discussion:35af3afc-f088-4d72-a275-3f31a9c5535c
Forums  >  Wedding Boards  >  Registering and Gifts  >  Home Buying Fund Registry?
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Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 1:12 PM EST on theknot.com
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 Are there any registries that allow your guest to contribute to buying a home? 
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 1:26 PM EST on theknot.com
Joined on
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 Yes, it's called the guests put cash or checks into a card and you use it however you wish. 
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 1:37 PM EST on theknot.com
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 If you lurk on this board you'll see what people say about asking for cash gifts, and that if you would prefer cash create a small-ish registry for people who do prefer to give a boxed gift and then if people directly ask what you want, it can be mentioned that you are trying to save for a downpayment on a house.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 1:43 PM EST on theknot.com
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 In Response to Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?:
Yes, it's called the guests put cash or checks into a card and you use it however you wish. 
Posted by jagore08


This!
I find this type of registry even worse than a honeymoon registry, which I hate.
Create a small registry and spread the word you are saving for a house. People know cash is a good gift!

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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 2:29 PM EST on theknot.com
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 In Response to Home Buying Fund Registry?:
Are there any registries that allow your guest to contribute to buying a home? 
Posted by ashjusfen


I'm sure they exists but they're incredibly rude and tacky.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 2:31 PM EST on theknot.com
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 If you want to be rude, yes.  People know that cash is always appreciated.  Just make a small registry, they will get the point that you prefer cash.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 4:05 PM EST on theknot.com
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LONG ISLAND
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Last: 5/3/2012


 Yes there... Here are a few...

http://www.myregistry.com
5% is deducted from every donation made by a guest.
2.9% is deducted by Paypal every time you withdraw any money

http://www.wedshare.com
2.9% is deducted by Paypal every time you withdraw any money

http://www.hatchmyhouse.com
5.9% transaction fee

http://www.downpaymentdreams.com
$50 registration fee
2.9% is deducted by Paypal every time you withdraw any money


OP, do you see a pattern here?
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 5:51 PM EST on theknot.com
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 In Response to Home Buying Fund Registry?:
Are there any registries that allow your guest to contribute to buying a home? 
Posted by ashjusfen

This is a joke, right?!  Incredibly rude request to make of your guests. 

If people want to give you a cash gift they will put check/cash in a card. You don't need some gimmicky, tacky website to collect the money.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 6:12 PM EST on theknot.com
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 Gag.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 6:49 PM EST on theknot.com
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 In Response to Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?:
Yes, it's called the guests put cash or checks into a card and you use it however you wish. 
Posted by jagore08


If only there were a way to accomplish the same result by directly asking for cash, giving a percent to a third party, and offending a few guests in the process!  Oh wait.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/7/2012 8:54 PM EST on theknot.com
Joined on
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NORTH CAROLINA
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Posts: 12573
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Last: 5/24/2012


 It's horribly rude to ask people for cash as a gift.

It's beyond rude to ask other people to buy a house for you.
"I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years."
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/8/2012 9:00 PM EST on theknot.com
Joined on
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HOUSTON
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Last: 5/25/2012


 As other's have suggested, if you're saving up to buy a home just create a small registry (for those guests who insist on buying you something physical regardless) and let your close friends & family spread by word of mouth that you're saving up for a home.  People already know that money is an acceptable gift.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/9/2012 12:41 PM EST on theknot.com
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 I just have to say I'm flabbergasted at the responses to your question. So, to people, asking others to buy you a $200 kitchen aid mixer is more polite than asking someone to contribute to your dream of owning a home? There are many people who have all that they need within the home, and would rather the gifts go somewhere useful. And in NY and other northern states, giving money at the wedding is the tradition.

I too, am looking for a monetary registry because I live overseas in Egypt and am having part of my celebration here. Should I forego a resistry simply because money makes more sense as shipping to Egypt is at least $100 for a small item? And there aren't many of the big name stores here? Come on.

People will contribute as much as they can just as they would buy you whatever is in their price range from a registry. I'm thinking something like an ING bank account where people can deposit money and you can use it as an account. I would just say "In lieu of the traditional registry, since my fiance and I have all we need for a home, we are looking to set up a fund for buying a new home for all of our nice things to fit in to together. Please as you would on a regular registry help out only as you can. It's much appreciated and we look forward to having you visit!" Makes sense and is mature and people, if they're your friends and family, will understand.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/9/2012 5:19 PM EST on theknot.com
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 In Response to Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?:
I just have to say I'm flabbergasted at the responses to your question. So, to people, asking others to buy you a $200 kitchen aid mixer is more polite than asking someone to contribute to your dream of owning a home? There are many people who have all that they need within the home, and would rather the gifts go somewhere useful. And in NY and other northern states, giving money at the wedding is the tradition. I too, am looking for a monetary registry because I live overseas in Egypt and am having part of my celebration here. Should I forego a resistry simply because money makes more sense as shipping to Egypt is at least $100 for a small item? And there aren't many of the big name stores here? Come on. People will contribute as much as they can just as they would buy you whatever is in their price range from a registry. I'm thinking something like an ING bank account where people can deposit money and you can use it as an account. I would just say "In lieu of the traditional registry, since my fiance and I have all we need for a home, we are looking to set up a fund for buying a new home for all of our nice things to fit in to together. Please as you would on a regular registry help out only as you can. It's much appreciated and we look forward to having you visit!" Makes sense and is mature and people, if they're your friends and family, will understand.
Posted by Farasa7


No.



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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/9/2012 9:59 PM EST on theknot.com
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Last: 3/17/2012


 I agree! My fiancé and I have lived on our own for years and have invested in "big kid" things: furniture, kitchen essentials (we both cook, so *everything* is essential), electronics, etc. We have more than enough stuff, but no where to put it once we're married! 

An ING Direct Savings account is also a good idea because it has the highest interest rate, so your money is making money (not an interest rate on deposits or withdrawls, but as a return). 

I understand there will be family members who do not agree with this, or who could possibly be offended (though I don't see why...you know how much the mixer cost so you're gonna know how much they spent anyway), but those guests will go the traditional route anyway and get you the mixer you didn't register for.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/9/2012 10:27 PM EST on theknot.com
Joined on
12-19-2005
NORTH CAROLINA
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Posts: 12573
First: 7/20/2009

Last: 5/24/2012


 It's not polite to ask other people to give you  their money. The fact that it's a wedding doesn't change this.

Writing a check is not a faux pas on the guest's part because they were not asked outright to do so, and did it on their own. (Which is another reason why nobody needs to do a honeymoon registry. People already know how to write checks and slip them into a card if they are so inclined).

Traditional registries fly under the radar because:
They are a wish list only. Nobody has to use it.
They aren't a request for other people's money.
Registry info is only provided when requested by the guest.

Honeymoon and house registries are a request for other people to pay your bills for you. Tacky.
"I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years."
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/9/2012 10:45 PM EST on theknot.com
Joined on
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Last: 2/28/2012


 Cash registries never get a good reputation here on The Knot, even though the Emily Post Institute says that they are perfectly acceptable. Our guests have had a very good response to our Honeymoon Pixie registry. We're using it for a few extras on our honeymoon, but you could also add in some options to donate to your home buying fund.

One of the biggest problems people have with cash registries is that you don't technically have to use the money guests give you for their intended purposes. The money goes into a fund, and then you can technically do whatever you want with it. HOWEVER, we fully intend to use the funds our guests gift us with to do the activities they purchase for our honeymoon.

We can't wait to take photos of us doing the things our guests have gifted us with for our thank you notes!
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/10/2012 8:24 AM EST on theknot.com
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 In Response to Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?:
In Response to Re: Home Buying Fund Registry? : No.
Posted by specialk84


I'm scrolling down like, "Oh, I can't wait to see what she has to say," then I just see "No."

And it was perfect. ;)

No. Just, no.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/10/2012 9:53 PM EST on theknot.com
Joined on
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NORTH CAROLINA
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Posts: 12573
First: 7/20/2009

Last: 5/24/2012


 The Emily Post Institute is exactly that....an INSTITUTE now.  They endorse behavior that grand lady would never approve.

Stick with Amy Vanderbilt or Miss Manners (Judith Martin).
"I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years."
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/13/2012 12:11 PM EST on theknot.com
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 In Response to Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?:
Traditional registries fly under the radar because: They are a wish list only. Nobody has to use it. They aren't a request for other people's money. Registry info is only provided when requested by the guest. Honeymoon and house registries are a request for other people to pay your bills for you. Tacky.
Posted by RetreadBride


Honeymoon registries and the like area also only wish lists, and guests can choose to buy a different gift or bring no gift at all if they prefer. And you don't advertise a honeymoon/house fund registry on your invitations, either, if you have any tact. You do the same thing as with a traditional registry - spread the info by word of mouth, shower invitations, and maybe your wedding website. Honeymoon/house registries simply give guests another option for giving the gift of experiences or pitching in for very big ticket items if they so choose.
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Re: Home Buying Fund Registry?

posted at 2/15/2012 7:49 PM EST on theknot.com
Joined on
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Posts: 12573
First: 7/20/2009

Last: 5/24/2012


 ::Bangs head on desk::
"I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years."
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