China dinnerware, do or don't?

thkewedding

Our wedding still isn't for a while, but we've been trying to figure out whether or not we should even put a china set on our registry when we do make one. We know we want one registry to be at Macy's and we haven't decided on the other yet. We were looking at some of the pricing for Macy's fine china sets and the pricing (for 6 of the 5 piece sets, 6 bowls, 2 gravy bowls, 2 serving dishes, utensils, cups, etc from Lenox) was in the thousands. It would almost cost more for all the china than the reception. Is this normal? I certainly don't expect guest to shell out that much and I definitely don't want to end up with various pieces of the set.

Is this the normal price or is it just extra expensive since it's Macy's? It certainly seems crazy to ask guest to dish out that much when we could just accept cash instead and put it towards a house.

Do you even need to put china on a registry, or is it okay just to put every day dish ware?

hoffse

Yes this is normal.  Lenox is rather reasonably priced, actually.  I have friends who registered for the $500+/place settings by Royal Crown Derby and Mottaehdeh.

What we did was contemplate our largest dinner we were likely to host (Thanksgiving) and then figure out what we needed.  For instance, we didn't register for 6 bowls, but two, plus the covered veggie bowl.  We also registered for one gravy boat, instead of two.  People can pass it.

If you want to lower the price of a set like this, find some nice serving pieces that coordinate but don't cost as much.  We registered for this pattern:

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/lenox-pearl-platinum-dinnerware?ID=69332&cm_mmc=Google_DMA_Home_Coop_PLA-_-PLA+Home+Brands+-+Dinnerware+Coop_PLA+-+Dinnerware+-+Lenox+-+Sale-_-31574814657_-_-_mkwid_uveQWvVb|d{device}_31574814657%7C-%7CuveQWvVb

and then we added some additional serving pieces from this line, mostly to get different sizes and shapes:

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/lenox-serveware-organics-bead-collection?ID=693469&CategoryID=7923#fn=sp%3D1%26spc%3D22%26kws%3Dlenox%20organic%20pearl%26slotId%3D9

The nice thing is the serverware I just listed actually coordinates pretty well with our everyday also (fiesta) because it's neutral.  I tried it once and was surprised by how good it looked.  So that saved me a lot of money and a lot of space since I didn't have to buy casual serving pieces also.

All this is to say that yes, that's how much china costs.  If you want to know whether china is a popular gift in your circle, registry stalk some friends.  We actually received every single piece of ours, including the covered veggie bowl and the coffee pot.

If you don't think you want china, then don't register for it.  But if you think you might want it someday, now is the time because it's a very popular wedding gift in many circles..  You might be like us and get all of it or you might get none of it or only a few place settings.  If you don't get enough to complete it on your own, then you can always return it.

If you get enough to decide to complete it, also check out places like ebay, replacements.com, and amazon.com.  I have done remarkably well on those websites over the years - for example, I wanted one extra place setting than we registered for in case of breakage, and I ended up paying about $35 for a new set on ebay.

Finally, two additional points: first, it doesn't have to be completed in the weeks following your wedding.  This is one of those things you can collect slowly and that your H can give you as anniversary or birthday gifts.  Second, you will probably find that the people who buy china aren't likely to be the people who would just give you money if you didn't register for it.  It's an extremely traditional gift, and we received ours almost exclusively from friends of our parents and older family members.  For us, at least, these are not cash/gift card people.

hoffse

I should add - that serverware isn't on sale right now, but it is frequently 50-60% off.  If you find some patterns and things you like, just keep and eye on it and see what it actually costs most of the time.  Macy's prices on a lot of things are going to drop a lot after Thanksgiving and then stay low through the holidays.

hoffse

One final point - and most people probably wouldn't do this, but we did and it worked out great.  You can really work the Macy's sales if you are willing to stalk your own registry (I couldn't help myself).

A few times a year Macy's lowers the price of their Lenox china (and perhaps Wedgwood as well).  They also usually give you an additional 15% off plus two free soup bowls in that pattern if you spend $150 in a single transaction.  

We wanted the soup bowls, so we registered for a full set (12).  Well right before our wedding, Macy's ran this deal.  We received 8 soup bowls as free gifts because of people who spent more than $150.  The last four were purchased separately.

Our teapot and one of our platters was also purchased during a time when Macy's didn't have the items on sale at all.  I was registry-stalking like mad, so I saw it the day they got purchased.

What did we do?  We returned the 4 soup bowls that were purchased separately, plus the platter, and the teapot for store credit.  Lesson here: KEEP THE RECEIPTS THAT COME WITH THE ITEMS because Macy's will give you whatever amount the guest paid for them.  We just taped our receipts to the boxes as they arrived. 

We then waited for the next time Macy's ran the free soup bowl deal and bought the teapot and the platter with the discount in two separate transactions.  So the soup bowls were thrown in for free.  I also ordered online, so I went through ebates first and got cash back from them as well.

We netted about $400 in store credit doing this.  We used that store credit to buy a le creuset piece we both wanted but couldn't bring ourselves to register for, and also some clothes for H because he was about to start a summer job at a law firm and desperately needed a new suit.

Again, most people wouldn't take the time, but it was worth it for us.  We spent a very long time researching items and really only had to return for a few duplicates (not for quality reasons).  So returning a few extra items to Macy's wasn't a big deal.  

misssunshine17

I think it completely depends on your circle and if you think you'd actually use it. There was way too much other stuff that we cared about so we didn't register for china. H's grandmother ended up giving us hers when we moved into our new home, but otherwise we wouldn't have any. I remember people gawking at a shower that a girl registered for a $100 charger plate, so I think it's a know your circle thing.

audubonbride2013

We registered for both china and everyday dinnerware and got nearly complete sets of both.  We completed the rest ourselves because it was just 2 place settings of each.  If you want it or might want it in the future register for it now.

One thing to keep in mind when considering the cost of china is no one is going to go and buy all of it together.  You really want to look at the cost per place setting, because likely people will only buy 1 or 2 place settings.  Another thing is Macy's may be your best choice for china.  They put brands on sale during the semi-annual friends and family sale that never go on sale at other stores (kate spade, vera wang, etc), and they offer a free vegetable bowl in your pattern if 10 sets are purchased as a completion incentive.

emmyg65

We registered for a set of nice everyday dishes that are nice enough for formal occasions (Crate and Barrel Aspen). It's simple whiteware, very easy to match.

csuave

It sounds like you have some time to think about this so here are some things to consider:

• Do you have enough things on your registry?  If your crowd is into boxed gifts you will need more and china might help you fill it out.
• How high of a priority is it?  If the total value would be better used for other registry items or in cash (you will get more cash if you have a smaller registry) then you might not want to register for it.
• What kind of house do you think you will buy and will you host dinner parties/holidays there?  DH and I ended up in the city with a house that doesn't have a dining room.  We will probably not host many formal dinners because of this.

I suggest shopping around and seeing if you find something you like and at a price point that makes sense for you. 

Something else to consider is getting a used china set.  I have my mom's old set and it is nice to have in case I want to use it.  I have it all stacked in one cabinet, not using any protective storage because it is not really that fancy or valuable.  If I didn't have this and I told my close family members at the time of registering that I was on the fence about china I know my aunt would have offered me hers or my mom may have given me one of her sets.

You can also browse ebay, Craigslist and estate sales.  Something you really like might show up there and at a really good price.  Or just seeing what is out there could make you decide to wait until later (like when you are in your new house) because going this route will only cost a fraction of getting a new set and can be affordable in the future.

music11

We registered for, and received, 10 place settings of Lenox.  It was important to us, as we both enjoy hosting family and friends, and have fond memories of our parents using their china.  We live in a small house, but made the space as we knew that china was not something we would be able to purchase on our own later.

thkewedding

Thanks Hoffse, your post were incredibly helpful! I've been leaning towards the Venetian Lace set, which seems to be in the price range of the one you picked. 

Misssunshine- that's one of the things I'm worried about. The accent plate I was eyeing up is about $50. It almost seems silly for 1 plate. 

I know one of my friends didn't even bother putting any china on her registry. Another friend put it on her's, but didn't receive any of it. I'm pretty sure we'd eventually use it in the future for hosting holiday meals. Would you guys say there's a certain number of place settings to register for? 

photokitty

I registered for enough to host my immediate family, spouses, and DH parents. So for me that was a whopping 16. Most people resister for 8 or 12. It really depends on the number you expect to host for a meal. I think it is best to register for a higher number bc china, for most people, it's not something they will go out and buy later as it such a large purchase.

Accent plates...I only revived 1. But bought them with my completion discount. So if you want them put them on there and you can use some of the cash or gift cards to get them

audubonbride2013

We registered for 12, which works for us since our immediate families live 3 hours apart (DC&Philly) with some of my family in FL and CA.  It isn't likely that we would have both families over at the same time.  We're also in a one bedroom apartment so when we have friends over for a sit down dinner we can't really fit more than 12 people.  

When we buy a house we might get more, but for now 12 is perfect.

hoffse

@sthorne91, if you think you might want it, just register for it and see.  You never know.  We got some china from older friends of our parents, but most of the serving pieces came from my aunts on my dad's side.  I later found out they actually had a family meeting and divvied up the china on my registry.  Then one of my bridesmaids bought the sugar bowl and one of H's aunts bought the creamer.  That's pretty much how it happened for us.

Venetian Lace is gorgeous (love that one).  It's also been around for awhile, so ebay has a good stock at decent prices.  The 13" platter is $100 on ebay right now and the oval veggie bowl is $80. That's just today.  So if you don't get all of it, completing it would be relatively easy for birthdays and holiday gifts.

Another good idea if you are registering at Macy's?  Their credit card registry rewards.  Granted, you have to make sure you always pay that bill... but that credit card gives you 10% back on everything you buy and 5% back on everything your guests buy from your registry.  We registered about a year out to rack up rewards, and I made a point to buy holiday and birthday gifts from Macy's, as well as my dresses for my shower and bridesmaid brunch.  After our wedding they sent us about $400 in gift cards.

We registered for 12 place settings, and I later bought a 13th off of ebay.  I wasn't in any hurry so I waited until a killer deal came up (I mentioned before I paid $35 for it).

thkewedding

Awesome! You guys have been super helpful I think I'll put it on there. If I don't receive any, no big deal and if I do, that's fantastic.

JoanE2012

If you register at Bed, Bath and Beyond, you (or your guests) will be able to use the 20% off coupons.  No restrictions for Lenox.