Hand Addressed Invites vs. Labels

kgd7357

It's not in our budget to hire a calligrapher, so we are debating hand writing addresses on the invites or printing labels with a really pretty calligrapher font. I know technically hand writing is proper, but I think the labels will look better. The invites are medium fancy for a non-black tie, night wedding at a country club. What would you prefer to get: a hand written normal hand writing invite or printed calligraphy?

Ven&Radio

Labels make your invitations look like junk mail.  Set aside 15 minutes a day to work on hand addressing envelopes - you'll be done before you know it!

lyndausvi

Prefer hand written.   

However, I'm not clutching my pearls if I receive a label.

EverAfer

Hand written, I don't care if it's not beautiful calligraphy, but I appreciate it when someone takes the time.

aRachel21

Can you print right onto the envelope instead of doing labels?  I think that would be a good compromise. 

Maggie0829

I think you should edit your poll and include a "Don't care" option.

With that said, I don't really care either way how it is addressed because I open the envelope, pull out the invite, then tear up and throw the envelope away.

Edited because spelling is hard.

kgd7357

@Maggie0829

Yeah, don't care should be an option. I don't think I would really care either. Hence the poll. I'm just going to go with the biggest crowd pleaser. I'm not really worried about the time (that is what watching inane TV shows are for), and more about the way the envelopes end up looking/what people like.

Jen4948

I don't care myself.  The important thing to me is that the invitation, however it's addressed, gets to the right place at the right time.

manateehugger

I think few people actually hire calligraphers nowadays. That being said, I prefer handwritten since it is personal mail. But it's not the end of the world. I'd run the envelopes through a printer before I put labels on them though - I think that's a much cleaner look. 

CMGragain

This really isn't a topic for a vote.  Etiquette says that wedding invitations should be hand addressed.  Period.  My personal opinion doesn't matter.

kgd7357

I didn't ask on the etiquette board b/c I know what the etiquette is. I just think hand written doesn't look as pretty if you don't get it done professionally. But it sounds like it's a crowd pleaser, so that's what I'm leaning towards. Just got to double check the ones my FI does to make sure people can read them. On the STDs he wrote out, he forgot that we need to put stamps in the right upper corner (we had post cards), so the last two or three letters of people with long names were covered by the stamp. oops.

CMGragain

Take an index card and trace bold black lines onto it with a pen.  Then insert the card inside your outer envelope, and you can use the black lines that show through the envelope as a guide so that won't happen.  Don't try to do more than ten at one sitting.  You'll be surprised how fast it goes!

kgd7357

@CMGragain

Thanks for the tip!

SashaVonBonBon

Don't care. As previous posters have mentioned, I don't pay attention to the envelope unless is particularly ornate. I have received hand-written envelopes that were like art, and have kept them. But I'm not clutching my pearls if every invitation I receive isn't like that. I also agree with you that if you're not getting a professional, then handwriting can look sloppy. I just would print directly on the envelope rather than labels.

dpelkey724

I personally prefer a label...which is what I am going to do.  Handwriting is for informal things to me, unless you have really pretty cursive (is it still called cursive) writing.  I mean, we are talking about a wedding invitation, not a Christmas card here.  Just my opinion.

atlastmrsg

Other posters in earlier threads have mentioned using a font that resembles the calligraphy you want, printing onto the envelope in light grey, and then tracing it with a calligraphy pen.  This was my backup plan.  While I didn't have to use it, it has the potential to be a creative and inexpensive solution if the cash for a calligrapher isn't in the budget.

kgd7357

That's an interesting idea. I might try that out on a few test envelopes and see how it looks. May be easier for the FI to put the address in the right spot too. haha.

CMGragain

dpelkey724 said:

I personally prefer a label...which is what I am going to do.  Handwriting is for informal things to me, unless you have really pretty cursive (is it still called cursive) writing.  I mean, we are talking about a wedding invitation, not a Christmas card here.  Just my opinion.

The formality of handwritten letters and invitations had been long established.  It is not a personal opinion.  It is etiquette.  All current etiquette authorities will tell you that you shouldn't use labels on wedding invitations.

photokitty

I vote victimless crime. I would prefer hand written, but realize it's more important that the postal carrier be able to read them to deliver them. If you can't write clearly go with labels, otherwise take the time to hand write

dpelkey724

CMGragain said:

dpelkey724 said:

I personally prefer a label...which is what I am going to do.  Handwriting is for informal things to me, unless you have really pretty cursive (is it still called cursive) writing.  I mean, we are talking about a wedding invitation, not a Christmas card here.  Just my opinion.

The formality of handwritten letters and invitations had been long established.  It is not a personal opinion.  It is etiquette.  All current etiquette authorities will tell you that you shouldn't use labels on wedding invitations.

Etiquette authorities?  We all have different preferences, different ideas, different things we find important...and how you address your wedding invites is a personal choice.  I don't think the etiquette authorities are going to come find me if I use labels.  It is really not that serious.

banana468

dpelkey724 said:

CMGragain said:

dpelkey724 said:

I personally prefer a label...which is what I am going to do.  Handwriting is for informal things to me, unless you have really pretty cursive (is it still called cursive) writing.  I mean, we are talking about a wedding invitation, not a Christmas card here.  Just my opinion.

The formality of handwritten letters and invitations had been long established.  It is not a personal opinion.  It is etiquette.  All current etiquette authorities will tell you that you shouldn't use labels on wedding invitations.

Etiquette authorities?  We all have different preferences, different ideas, different things we find important...and how you address your wedding invites is a personal choice.  I don't think the etiquette authorities are going to come find me if I use labels.  It is really not that serious.

Of course not.   There's a decent chance you can opt to do a ton of inappropriate things and you won't be called out on those choices.    That doesn't change the FACT that the appropriate thing to do is to address your wedding invitations by hand.    You can opt to do something different and you can even like that choice.    That doesn't change the FACT that such a choice would be the incorrect thing. 

dpelkey724

The incorrect thing according to who?  While I understand there is wedding etiquette...the days of following guidelines for weddings are LONG gone.  To each their own.  I don't think my guests will think of my wedding invitations as "incorrect" when they get them in the mail.

banana468

dpelkey724 said:

The incorrect thing according to who?  While I understand there is wedding etiquette...the days of following guidelines for weddings are LONG gone.  To each their own.  I don't think my guests will think of my wedding invitations as "incorrect" when they get them in the mail.

The rules of etiquette have been established. You can choose to ignore them but the days of following those rules are absolutely here. Generally, I find that only those desiring to do the rude thing are those claiming the rules are either gone or no longer apply to them.

CrazyCatLady3

I don't see how envelope addressing by hand or by printer fits under "etiquette"--it in no way affects your guests' comfort.  I am having addresses laser printed in a beautiful font directly onto my envelopes by the stationer doing my invites.  Non-professional hand addressing looks sloppy IMO and done by a professional is at least $3 per envelope.  The laser printing directly on the envelope costs 80 cents per envelope, and I thought it was a good compromise since I am splurging so much on my actual invitations.  I agree that labels don't look ideal (clear labels would look nicer if you have to do them), but I still think it will look cleaner than hand writing.

I will in fact hand write all the addresses on my TY notes, but the TY notes themselves will also be handwritten.  (Also, part of the point of a TY note is to show you put in a modicum of effort.)  My wedding invitations are being custom printed, so I think custom printing the addresses with a matching font is going to be the most aesthetically pleasing while at the same time not hurting my guests in any way.

majesty318

I was planning to hand-write them, but the invitation suite we are ordering from Etsy offers labels printed in the same design as the invitation. FI LOVED them and said the hand writing rule is stupid. Although I do in general follow the traditional etiquette rules, I decided to give this battle to FI. I also consider it a victimless crime.

CMGragain

Nobody on this board is going to tell you to do something that is incorrect according to etiquette.  You can address your invitations correctly (by hand), or you can choose to do them incorrectly.  Just don't try to justify it.  Tell Aunt Sophie, "I know I was supposed to address my invitations by hand, but I decided not to do it."  No excuses.

dpelkey724

I am sure Aunt Sophie will be happy to get an invitation to celebrate two lives becoming one.  And besides, is the wedding really about the label that comes on an envelope?

CrazyCatLady3

CMGragain said:

Nobody on this board is going to tell you to do something that is incorrect according to etiquette.  You can address your invitations correctly (by hand), or you can choose to do them incorrectly.  Just don't try to justify it.  Tell Aunt Sophie, "I know I was supposed to address my invitations by hand, but I decided not to do it."  No excuses.

Please explain how hand vs. printing implicates etiquette.  (Tradition, maybe, but not etiquette).  How does it negatively impact your guests if their address is printed?

ETA: I would also argue that if you have bad handwriting, it looks like you care more if you print, i.e. you wanted it to look clean, than send something with poor handwriting.

CMGragain

Sorry, I should have used footnotes.  Emily Post, Amy Vanderbilt, Miss Manners.  This is not a personal opinion.  If you want to do it incorrectly, then go ahead, but at least admit it and stop making excuses.  People with terrible handwriting have the option of asking or paying someone else to do it for them.

CrazyCatLady3

CMGragain said:

Sorry, I should have used footnotes.  Emily Post, Amy Vanderbilt, Miss Manners.  This is not a personal opinion.  If you want to do it incorrectly, then go ahead, but at least admit it and stop making excuses.  People with terrible handwriting have the option of asking or paying someone else to do it for them.

double post

CrazyCatLady3

CMGragain said:

Sorry, I should have used footnotes.  Emily Post, Amy Vanderbilt, Miss Manners.  This is not a personal opinion.  If you want to do it incorrectly, then go ahead, but at least admit it and stop making excuses.  People with terrible handwriting have the option of asking or paying someone else to do it for them.

No citations necessary.  Just wanted an explanation as to how this issue affects guests' comfort, which is the standard put forth on the etiquette board in evaluating etiquette issues.