Bridesmaid using all my ideas in her wedding....?

theninjapanda

Really? 

I live in a very small town. There really are not that many venues to have the wedding at. One of my good friends whom I have known for over 10 years just got engaged and is now planning her wedding. I am really excited for her and love her fiance. Before she even got engaged she was helping me out plan my wedding. Found the perfect venue, and I have almost all the details down. Even though I am getting marred in 2015 after the baby is born. 

Come to find out almost every idea I had, except for the colors, she is using. She is getting married in August. I am getting married 7 months after her. It just really irks me. She already booked the venue. And now has asked for my help with the decor since as she puts it, "we have the same ideas." I really just don't want to at this moment and I told her that. All the table decor. Everything is exactly the same. 

Am I being petty? 

zitiqueen

theninjapanda said:

Really? 

I live in a very small town. There really are not that many venues to have the wedding at. One of my good friends whom I have known for over 10 years just got engaged and is now planning her wedding. I am really excited for her and love her fiance. Before she even got engaged she was helping me out plan my wedding. Found the perfect venue, and I have almost all the details down. Even though I am getting marred in 2015 after the baby is born. 

Come to find out almost every idea I had, except for the colors, she is using. She is getting married in August. I am getting married 7 months after her. It just really irks me. She already booked the venue. And now has asked for my help with the decor since as she puts it, "we have the same ideas." I really just don't want to at this moment and I told her that. All the table decor. Everything is exactly the same. 

Am I being petty? 

I guarantee you nobody will remember anything about her wedding when yours rolls around.

theninjapanda

Thanks ladies. It just really irked me. Maybe just hormones. I will just relax and let it go. 

Rebl90

I had a similar situation, so I just made changes and didn't tell the BM. If yours is 7 months later than everyone will be admiring everything you've done to make your day special, her day will be old news

RebeccaB88

I would just stop telling her your ideas. And then find new ideas after she's married that you like better.

RebeccaB88

DP

firebabe6519

I agree with PP. Don't share your plans / ideas with her in the future if you want to avoid further similarities. I'm sure guests will simply be admiring your special day and how beautiful a couple you are to nitpick any similarities.

CaliMel11

I wouldn't share your ideas that you have for your own wedding with her. But really if you think about it, most weddings are very similar to one another. Just have her share her ideas with you and give your honest input on those, but I wouldn't give her ideas if that makes sense?

HaileyDancingbear

Honestly, most weddings look alike anyways.  I wouldn't attend both weddings and upon arriving at yours think "Wow these weddings look too similar" I'd think "Wow these weddings look like weddings."  

You also have to keep in mind that you can't really claim an idea, and you wouldn't want your friend to have a wedding that she doesn't like as much because she's trying too hard to avoid things she likes because they're too similar.  

That said, if they're really identical, down to the table settings, then I can see why you'd be annoyed.  If I were you I'd stop telling her about your ideas and change them up a bit so they're not identical.

MyNameIsNot

There are really only a finite number of decor options for weddings.  You can be sure that every idea you've had has been done before.  You still have more than a year to go.  You'll have plenty more ideas and inspiration between now and then.  Putting planning details on the back burner for a while.

If you don't want her to copy your ideas, don't tell her about them.  There's no reason she should know what your table settings are going to look like more than a year before your wedding.