Anyone not planning a formal sit-down, assigned-seating dinner?

abaron3

Our venue is somewhat limited in space, but we had really fallen in love with the location, the convenience and etc. If we did more of a small-plate idea where appetizer-sized portions would be served through most of the reception, permitting more movement, would that sound "worth it" to a guest? The disparity in the size of our families is so large (he has 5x the number of family members invited) that the formal sit-down meal would seem a little out of place. Thoughts? Suggestions? Is anyone else planning something alternative to traditional dinner?

mysticl

My sister throws parties like this and they are great (she really knows how to pick a caterer).  But there is a ton of food at them.  Way more than if she just served everyone dinner because to do it right you have to assume everyone will take at least one of everything.  So to make sure that everyone gets enough to eat it will probably end up costing you way more than dinner.  Also, even with "just" appetizers everyone still needs a place to sit.  You cannot expect them to stand all night, even if you provide high top tables.  

I'm not sure what the difference in family size has to do with not having a sit down meal. My husband had a lot more family attend than I did.  We still did a buffet with assigned tables and there was nothing odd about it.  

Liatris2010

What time is your reception?
If it is dinner-time, there needs to be enough food to constitute dinner. Stations would be fine, but I don't think most people could make a dinner out of passed appetizers.

I'm not sure why you think different sized families means you can't have a sit-down dinner.

abaron3

I guess I was hoping that even with seating, that there could be more mingling between the families rather than sit my entire on an island (table). The reception would start around 4 or 5 and go through dinner time. I was thinking that there would be enough food to constitute a meal. Seating takes up less space than 8-top tables though, which was the hope...

abaron3

@mysticl That's what I had in mind! Just a ton of different passed appetizers, but with more than enough to fill up on. The idea was sort of a global, food trip around the world idea with shooters of gaspacho, sushi, spanakopita, kefta kabobs, shot glasses with cocktail sauce and a single jumbo shrimp, etc. Too nuts for a wedding reception?

mysticl

My sister's parties are awesome but I don't mingle at them.  I hang with family members unless she is specifically introducing me to someone.  As the hosts she and her husband are all over the place but not the rest of us.  Everyone pretty much finds their group and stays there unless they are headed to the bar or a food station.  She does mostly passed items with a couple of stations.  

When you say "seating" do you mean just chairs or are you including tables in that?  Because people need tables.  They need to put their drink down, their food, their camera, their phone, etc.  Trying to balance and drink and an appetizer does not work well, trust me.  

Don't worry about your families becoming friends and spending time together.  It is entirely possible they will never see each other again.  My mom and mil didn't even see each other when my son was born.  They staggered their visits.  

AprilH81

abaron3 said:

@mysticl That's what I had in mind! Just a ton of different passed appetizers, but with more than enough to fill up on. The idea was sort of a global, food trip around the world idea with shooters of gaspacho, sushi, spanakopita, kefta kabobs, shot glasses with cocktail sauce and a single jumbo shrimp, etc. Too nuts for a wedding reception?

As long as you have enough for everyone to have a "meal" you are okay.  The primary  concern will be about seating.  Eating while standing and holding a plate and drink is near impossible and not having enough seats will just encourage people to find a seat and NOT get up again in case they lose out.  There must be as many seats as guests (and don't forget to include yourselves and any vendors you are feeding in that count).

abaron3

mysticlAprilH81 You both make a good point about seating and where food and beverage can be rested. I guess that's the next challenge. 

AprilH81

abaron3 said:

mysticlAprilH81 You both make a good point about seating and where food and beverage can be rested. I guess that's the next challenge. 

If you don't want something as formal as round banquet tables you can have a mix of lounge seating (with coordinating tables so you can sit food/drinks down) bar tables with bar stools and different size banquet tables and seating. 

Maggie0829

AprilH81 said:

abaron3 said:

mysticlAprilH81 You both make a good point about seating and where food and beverage can be rested. I guess that's the next challenge. 

If you don't want something as formal as round banquet tables you can have a mix of lounge seating (with coordinating tables so you can sit food/drinks down) bar tables with bar stools and different size banquet tables and seating. 

This.  And this would also promote that mingling cocktail party feel you seem to be going for.

abaron3

You guys are great!  A better-thought-out plan is coming together. Thanks for the help!