Am I a Bridezilla if I am the only one to get my hair done?

LarraO2530

I have a little time to decide, as I haven't even asked my prospective maids to be my maids yet. I just wanted to get some insight into what you all thought. We are all nursing students, and all my girls are very good at doing their own hair and make-up...actually much better at it than I can do for myself. (kinda makes me a little jealous hehe) What I want is a pretty simple style for myself, because I want to look like me on my wedding day, not a fairytale princess or a magazine page...But I know it's just enough out of my realm of ponytail and straightening iron for me to do on my own. My concern is, do you think I am being a bridezilla by telling my girls that they can feel free to do their own hair and make-up however they choose? I know they would probably appreciate not having to spend the extra money as we are all paying for $1000s in books/tuition right now, but I don't want them to take it the wrong way, as if I'm saying I'm the bride and I deserve to have pro hair but not you. I'm not saying that at all, but I don't want to make it a requirement. By all means, if they choose to get their hair done by a professional, that is perfectly fine, my girls are all gorgeous and I want them to feel that way too. I just don't want to seem like I'm being bitchy or that I don't care by telling them it's their decision. Help?

ScoutF

Not a bridezilla move at all. I told my BMs they could do their hair and makeup however they wanted, and they were all going to get them both professionally done. I checked budgets and made appointments with the same people doing mine. I actually ended up paying for their makeup in the end. 

MobKaz

What you do for yourself has nothing to do with the other girls in your wedding party.  If you chose to have your nails done, would it make you question that?  Of course not.

If you demand that your BM's get their hair and make up professionally done (sadly, there are too many examples of this precedent to cite) then you are obliged to pay for it.  Many brides will tell their BM's something along these lines.........."I am having my hair and make up done at XYZ salon.  None of you are under any obligation to do the same.  However, if it is something you are interested in, and would like to make an appointment at the same salon, I can give you the information."  If they know you well, you can simply make a joke about how style challenged you are and want to play it safe.   Congratulate them on having better skills!

Some of my daughters BM's joined for hair, or just make up, or both.  One friend opted out of doing any, but joined them for the fun and food that followed.

LarraO2530

Haha, oh yeah, the extent of my make up is a little black mascara and chap stick!! I made an attempt at a smokey eye once and looked like I had been punched in the face! My hair is also tricky to curl, as it likes to fall by the time the other side of my head is curled. They did take me once to have a "make over" at the Clinique counter, and oh Lord it was bad. The make-up artist had so much concealer and foundation caked on my face that you couldn't even see me blushing from all the attention. I felt like I looked like Mimi from the Drew Carey show...

Thanks for the input! I feel like they may opt to come with me, which is great, I'm all for a little group pampering. I just don't want them to feel obligated, nor left out. They'll all understand the joke about my style challange!! Luckily there are no pictures of these unfortunate events LOL.

climbingsingle

Not a bridezilla move at all. I'm also seriously challenged when it comes to doing my own hair and makeup. 

I'm sure your BMs will be happy that you're giving them the freedom to do what they want with their hair and makeup. 

OBX2011

I applaud you for not requiring your girls to have pro hair and make-up done  A lot of brides require this of their BM's and then expect them to pay for it, which is a big no-no.  

Honestly, it never came up in conversation with my girls until it was time for me to make my appointments.  The salon asked if any of my girls wanted theirs done and I completely left it up to them.  

Good for you for letting them make the choice!

princessleia22

Not at all. When I was going to set appointment for my hair/makeup, I let my BM's know prices and asked if they would be interested or if they'd rather do their own. I also asked MOB & MOG if they wanted appointment (pampering is always nice). All BM's opted for hair only. Mom's both said they could do their own. But I left it totally up to them.

Marzipan13

Nope!  I'm doing a similar thing.  I told my BMs and moms that I'd be getting my hair & makeup done at a certain salon, told them the prices, and left the choice up to them.  They all ended up opting for pampering anyhow :P   I'm excited to spend the morning with all the ladies!

LarraO2530

Thanks for the input! I'm sure they will all appreciate the option, and my FMIL will love coming to be pampered as well, she was thinking of suggesting a spa day for my bachelorette party instead of greasy men with socks in their bikini pants LOL!

[Deleted User]

Not a bridezilla move at all. I was the same way because I couldn't afford to pay for all of them to get their hair done & I didn't want to require a certain thing. They all have good taste so I trusted them to do what was right for them. One of my girls has a pixie cut and there isn't anything a stylist can to for her that she couldn't do at home. For my wedding I told the girls that they could do their hair & makeup however they wanted to but if they wanted to come to the salon, this is what the prices would be & to let me know so I could book a stylist for them. If you did that then if your BM didn't want to spend the money then they don't have to, but if they want to splurge and be pampered some, they can.

PS...since you are all students and on budgets, consider looking at Target under Bridesmaid dresses for some possible cute options at good prices. They don't carry these dresses in the store unfortunatley but they would qualify for free shipping.

vmj23

Nope, not at all!   I am going to a salon that I always go to, and when setting my appointment I emailed the BMs, let them know I was going there, told them prices for this place, and told them they can do/go whever  they'd like, but if they wanted me to schedule appointments for them, just let me know.  I am getting my hair and makeup.  2 Of the girls asked me to schedule hair appointments for them, and a third asked me if it was okay for her to go somewhere else, which I have no problem with at all. 

LarraO2530

Awesome, thanks for all the great advice! I only have 3 relatives weddings that I've been in to go by, and all 3 required me to pay for dress, matching shoes, hair at a specific salon. It's great to be thought of as a BM consciousbride and not a bridezilla for giving the girls a choice!