Dear Prudence, In the heat of an argument with my wife I
often detach myself from my emotions and try to look at what is
happening objectively. This inevitably irritates her because she thinks I
am both acting morally superior and not really being objective because
too often I side with myself. But if I can objectively pick apart and
present both sides of my wife’s and my arguments, and it turns out I’m
right, shouldn’t this help? If not, what is a better way of ending our
arguments and stopping future ones? —Neurotic
Dear Neurotic,
Oh, so it’s your fault that the objective, unassailable, and
wholly knowable reality of life on Planet Earth—a reality which you,
uniquely, can understand because of your singular ability to slough off
the ponderous haircoat of human bias—just happens to totally
accidentally more closely mirror your personal experience than it does
your over-emotional, hysterical wife’s? Puh-fucking-lease.