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Ask bridesmaids/maid of honor all at once or individually?

Lee+AndrewLee+Andrew member
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edited April 2014 in Wedding Party
Hello my fellow brides to be!

My fiance and I are having an Engagement party and we invited our immediate family members and the friends we have chosen to be in our wedding. I made individual things for them to open with the question, "Will you be my...?" but I don't know how to go about handing it to them? Should it be individually throughout the day of the party or all at once? Any ideas or advice is appreciated. Thanks!
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Re: Ask bridesmaids/maid of honor all at once or individually?

  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    DO NOT ask them together. That would make it very hard for one of them to decline if they wanted to or needed to. 

    These are your closest friends, right? They deserved to be asked separately. 
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
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    I agree that they should be asked individually.  In a group setting they will all feel pressured to say yes when one or more may want to say no.

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  • Lee+AndrewLee+Andrew member
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    Okay, thanks!
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its

    Lee+Andrew said:
    Hello my fellow brides to be!

    My fiance and I are having an Engagement BBQ in May and we invited our immediate family members and the friends we have chosen to be in our wedding. I made individual things for them to open with the question, "Will you be my...?" but I don't know how to go about handing it to them? Should it be individually throughout the day of the party or all at once? Any ideas or advice is appreciated. Thanks!
    I'm sorry if this isn't the answer you are looking for, but...

    Ask them separately and privately, without giving them gifts or other gestures.  They may have to say no, due to scheduling conflicts, financial issues, or other reasons, and asking them in a group, along with a gift, may make them feel pressured into saying yes.  Even if they would have said yes anyway, making too big a production of asking them could really make them uncomfortable, and that's not what you really want to do to people you are asking a really huge favor from.
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  • Lee+AndrewLee+Andrew member
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    No, it's not a gift. It's just a cute way of asking. I'll figure out a way to ask them privately. Thanks for the advice.
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  • mysticlmysticl member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Lee+Andrew said:
    No, it's not a gift. It's just a cute way of asking. I'll figure out a way to ask them privately. Thanks for the advice.
    "Susie, would you be my bridesmaid?" It's that simple.  

    Now my MOH and I did not ask each other to be in our weddings.  It was absolutely understood we would be.  
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