Uninvited Guest

gladyscf

We've sent our STD to a couple that we are friends with who have a 20-21 year old daughter who just had a baby and lives at home with them. I addressed the envelope to Mr & Mrs. Guest. I did not include the daughter's name nor did I include "and family." 

I received an email from Mrs. Guest saying how excited they are and how excited their daughter is also. Then went on to say they weren't sure how daughter was going to get to wedding (it's in Las Vegas) and how they were going to drive but thought that it might be too long of a drive for daughter and new baby. 

How do I politely tell her that daughter isn't invited? We really don't want to extend an invitation to the daughter as then I'm thinking they would want boyfriend/baby's father to attend and then I feel like we should extend the invitation to their other two kids which would put us at potentially 6 extra people we weren't counting on to begin with. The hard part is that they are close friends. 

Thanks in advance!

KatWAG

mrsstatic2b said:

We've sent our STD to a couple that we are friends with who have a 20-21 year old daughter who just had a baby and lives at home with them. I addressed the envelope to Mr & Mrs. Guest. I did not include the daughter's name nor did I include "and family." 

I received an email from Mrs. Guest saying how excited they are and how excited their daughter is also. Then went on to say they weren't sure how daughter was going to get to wedding (it's in Las Vegas) and how they were going to drive but thought that it might be too long of a drive for daughter and new baby. 

How do I politely tell her that daughter isn't invited? We really don't want to extend an invitation to the daughter as then I'm thinking they would want boyfriend/baby's father to attend and then I feel like we should extend the invitation to their other two kids which would put us at potentially 6 extra people we weren't counting on to begin with. The hard part is that they are close friends. 

Thanks in advance!

"Hi Sally,

I am so happy to hear you plan to attend our wedding. Unfortunately, the invite is only for you and H. I apologize for the confusion. Hope to see you soon!

Mrsstatic2b

Maggie0829

mrsstatic2b said:

We've sent our STD to a couple that we are friends with who have a 20-21 year old daughter who just had a baby and lives at home with them. I addressed the envelope to Mr & Mrs. Guest. I did not include the daughter's name nor did I include "and family." 

I received an email from Mrs. Guest saying how excited they are and how excited their daughter is also. Then went on to say they weren't sure how daughter was going to get to wedding (it's in Las Vegas) and how they were going to drive but thought that it might be too long of a drive for daughter and new baby. 

How do I politely tell her that daughter isn't invited? We really don't want to extend an invitation to the daughter as then I'm thinking they would want boyfriend/baby's father to attend and then I feel like we should extend the invitation to their other two kids which would put us at potentially 6 extra people we weren't counting on to begin with. The hard part is that they are close friends. 

Thanks in advance!

Call them up and say "I am sorry if there was any confusion but the invite was only for your and your SO. We unfortunately cannot accommodate your daughter. I hope that we will still see you there."

Jen4948

Call them and tell them, "We are looking forward to seeing you, but there seems to be some confusion as to who is invited.  The invitation is for you and your SO only.  It is not possible for us to accommodate your daughter."

Emmy1493

I think all the above responses are how it needs to be said. I had a few like that and pretty much told them what PP's have said. If they don't like it, they don't have to go. Close or not.

phira

"I'm so sorry for the misunderstanding ..."

Even though the misunderstanding was obviously not your fault.

theexactlee

Sad...it's so unfortunate when people can't read. It wasn't even big words.

gladyscf

Thanks ladies!

I was kind of surprised because she reminds us all the time that she is a teacher and the proper way of doing this and that. 

After my initial horror of having to correct her, I did kind of giggle, but that's only the snark coming out.

short+sassy

Of course, I wouldn't really say this, but the first response that popped in my head was:

"The long drive?  Not a problem at all!  Your daughter and granddaughter aren't invited anyway." (Said with a happy, perky, helpful tone.

ifeelgoodifeelgreatifeelwonderful

It's just a save the date, unless the daughter is planning on booking a flight I might ignore this until the invites get sent out. Then hopefully she realizes the daughter isn't invited, but if not I would address it then.

gladyscf

In her email she had addressed the idea of having the daughter and grandchild fly to Vegas and then have them ride back with them as they were planning on driving. I couldn't risk them buying a ticket. 

I haven't heard back from her since I sent the reply but that's not unusual. I will say that I'm a little nervous every time I hear my email notification because I didn't want to hurt any feelings. 

@short+sassy: I had a lot of things go through my mind along those lines!

cammy923

I hope all works out for you! I was just thinking that I might run into the same thing with a person on my GL. Hopefully your friend (as well as my guest) get the picture and don't just show up with the extra guests!!

slothiegal

Zombie thread, gonna close!