Advice on Timeline of wedding day

Knottie20965786

Hello!

This is my first post and.. I am hoping I posted it the right place !

Anyways, my boyfriend and I are planning our future wedding. (Don't judge!)

We have been together for 2 years and would like to have a wedding with his grandmother, who is turning 80 (the longest to live in her side of te family)

So we are just planning for now.

I want to have a Vietnamese wedding and tradition Western-culture wedding. However, I am not sure if I am giving enough time for photographs, and such. I usually get ready very quickly and for the Vietnamese wedding will simply put my hair in a bun, wear foundation, fake lashes, and eyeliner. For the wedding, create loose curls, smokey eyeshadow, fake lashes, and eyeliner, so I feel like it will be fairly quick. 

Everything will be at the same place.

We are inviting 170 guests. 35 are my family (out of town, except for 7) and the rest are his who are local to where the event will be.

His parents are divorce so we would like to take seperate pictures and pictures with both his parents.

Would 

9:00am	Get Ready/Makeup
10am-11pm	Vietnamese Wedding
11-11:30pm	Take pic with BM GM
11:30-12:30pm	Bride and Groom
1-3pm	Hair/make-up
3-4pm	Photography
4:15pm	Doors open/pre-ceremony
4:45pm	Invite time
5:00pm	Wedding Ceremony
5:00pm-6:30pm	Photography
6:00pm	Reception
6-7pm	Pictures/Cocktails
7:00pm	Reception
9pm

Thank you!

Maggie0829

Knottie20965786 said:

Hello!

This is my first post and.. I am hoping I posted it the right place !

Anyways, my boyfriend and I are planning our future wedding. (Don't judge!)

We have been together for 2 years and would like to have a wedding with his grandmother, who is turning 80 (the longest to live in her side of te family)

So we are just planning for now.

I want to have a Vietnamese wedding and tradition Western-culture wedding. However, I am not sure if I am giving enough time for photographs, and such. I usually get ready very quickly and for the Vietnamese wedding will simply put my hair in a bun, wear foundation, fake lashes, and eyeliner. For the wedding, create loose curls, smokey eyeshadow, fake lashes, and eyeliner, so I feel like it will be fairly quick. 

Everything will be at the same place.

We are inviting 170 guests. 35 are my family (out of town, except for 7) and the rest are his who are local to where the event will be.

His parents are divorce so we would like to take seperate pictures and pictures with both his parents.

Would 

9:00am	Get Ready/Makeup
10am-11pm	Vietnamese Wedding
11-11:30pm	Take pic with BM GM
11:30-12:30pm	Bride and Groom
1-3pm	Hair/make-up
3-4pm	Photography
4:15pm	Doors open/pre-ceremony
4:45pm	Invite time
5:00pm	Wedding Ceremony
5:00pm-6:30pm	Photography
6:00pm	Reception
6-7pm	Pictures/Cocktails
7:00pm	Reception
9pm

Thank you!

So are you two actually engaged or are you just planning this just because?  I am confused.

Also you are doing two ceremonies but what are your guests going to do in between the ceremonies? You need to provide them with something.  Also I feel that having the second ceremony is a bit much.  Would you not be truly married after the first ceremony?

And to the bolded.  What?

singinchick13

This makes no sense at all. And to me it looks like you have at least 3 hours of photography....how is that not enough?

KGold80

Are you planning a wedding (or two) or are you from a major fashion house and planning your next big campaign? It seems like you're more concerned with pictures than the wedding. That's concerning.

Why are you planning if you're not actually engaged?

NYCMercedes

What is 4:45 invite time?

Maggie0829

NYCMercedes said:

What is 4:45 invite time?

I am guessing the time they are going to put on the invite to make sure that people aren't late to their second ceremony of the day.

Viczaesar

This sounds like a godawful mess.  First, I don't think it's appropriate to expect your wedding party to be "on" from 9 am to 9 pm (if I'm reading it correctly that your reception ends at 9).  Second, what the hell kind of photographs are you taking that you think it'll take so long throughout the day?  Third, why are you having two ceremonies?  Who is invited to both of them?  If you're inviting anyone to the Vietnamese ceremony you need to host something afterward, but really, that's the least of your issues.  Fourth, your timeline makes no sense as it stands.

9:00am	Get Ready/Makeup -Who?
10am-11pm	Vietnamese Wedding -Who is invited?  How/when are you hosting them?
11-11:30pm	Take pic with BM GM
11:30-12:30pm	Bride and Groom -What does this mean?
1-3pm	Hair/make-up -Who?
3-4pm	Photography -Again?
4:15pm	Doors open/pre-ceremony -Why?
4:45pm	Invite time -This is rude.  Do not put a different start time on your invitations than the actual start time
5:00pm	Wedding Ceremony -How long will it last?
5:00pm-6:30pm	Photography - Yet AGAIN?
6:00pm	Reception -When does your ceremony end?  You need to host something starting at that time.  If your ceremony ends at 5:30 and it's in the same location as the reception, the reception needs to start at 5:30
6-7pm	Pictures/Cocktails -What on earth?  Why are you doing pictures for a FOURTH time?  This is just bizarre.  And rude to your guests.
7:00pm	Reception
9pm

ei34

One of my cousins married a Vietnamese woman, and they had one ceremony that combined her culture with his (Irish/Italian).  It was unique and beautiful.  Any chance you and your BF/FI (?) could do that?  Two ceremonies is one too many.  And do you realize with your proposed timeline you'd be asking your guests to spend almost 12 hours of their time at your wedding(s)?!
My suggestion would be one multicultural wedding (here in NYC I see them ALL the time), maybe around 4p, and then cocktail hour immediately following- while guests are eating and drinking you could take pictures...they don't take more than an hour.  Then reception.

MyNameIsNot

Step 1) Get engaged.  Step 2) begin planning wedding.  Step 3) Cut down on the photography.  What you are planning is excessive.  

It sounds like the wedding is an afterthought on your planned day of photography.  Save yourself the headache and just hire a photographer and do a photo shoot.  Bonus, you don't have to get engaged.  

manateehugger

How can you even remotely plan a timeline when: 1. You are not engaged. 2. You don't have vendors or venues - including a photographer. 3. You haven't consulted with those vendors or venues. 4. You don't have a budget, so you don't know what kind of reception you are hosting. And what PP's said - the number of photo shoot sessions is insane and your bridal party will not be happy campers. You don't need separate huge photo sessions for divorced parents and separate families. You need one in which your photog directs people to switch in and out of the shot; if you had consulted with a photographer, he/she would clue you in on this. ETA: TK doesn't think I need to use paragraphs apparently. Also, I think (or hope, rather) you're confused about how wedding photography works. Most photos are posed in the moment or they are candid. So while you're getting ready, your photographer will actively be shooting and directing people around. You don't need separate hour-long sessions.

Emmy1493

I get thinking ahead on what you two are going to do culture wise....but a timeline is a bit too much. Actually, it's way too much right now. I didn't even have that all down untill last week. AND I am getting married next week. Slow your roll hun and just focus on now.

P.S. I do judge. At least this whole bit...sorrynotsorry.

mysticl

Maybe she means the photographer will be shooting while these things are going on?

OP you are putting the cart before the horse.  Get engaged first. Then rethink all of your planning. Twelve hours is a very long day.  You may not find a venue that will let you be there that long.  Many of the ones I looked at had 4 or 5 hour limits on them.  Sometimes you could get a 30-60 minute extension….for an extra fee.  I can't imagine what a photographer would charge for 12 hours.  

ETA:  This isn't really a question for the wedding party board.  This board is for questions about the wedding party i.e. the people who are in your wedding.  

cthuyn

I know a lot of commenters here think 2 ceremonies is a bit much, and I myself am opting to just have one interracial wedding, but my sister had the vietnamese ceremony in the morning and western wedding in the evening. You do seem to have an excessive number of photo blocks scheduled, though. From what I remember of her wedding, it went something like:

early morning: hair and makeup for the day

mid-morning: vietnamese ceremony only with family and very close friends at home

immediately following: pictures with family (I think more receiving line style) and casual catered lunch

After lunch, most of the family I think hung out at the house, but their hotel was also super close so they could go back and take a nap or something for a few hours until the evening ceremony. Having talked to some other international people, having a gap like this isn't entirely unusual.

Early afternoon, she got ready for the western ceremony. She did not do first look photos with the groom before the ceremony, but my photographer has suggested booking a couple hours for that. Then the rest of her schedule was something like

5:30 ceremony

6:00 cocktail hour while taking pics with extended family

7:00 reception

11:00 end

I'm not sure why you have an hour blocked off during the reception for additional pictures and cocktails. My photographer likes to steal the couple for maybe 20 minutes for some nighttime photos, but I feel like with the number of guests you're going to have, you won't have an hour during the reception for private photos. You might have meant that for the photographer to take pics of guests during the reception, but they're going to do that anyway if you've hired them for that length of time.

Anyway, hope that helps. Things will probably be easier to solidify when you actually start booking vendors, though.

cassgh

Don't plan so much time for pictures!!!  The natural pictures of everyone just doing their thing look so much better than ones that are staged or where you are posing for the camera.  The only time for pics you should "budget" into your schedule of events is right after the ceremony for pictures with your family and wedding party, but that won't take nearly as much as time as you are planning for.

[Deleted User]

Would the same people be invited to the first ceremony & the second. My concern is that since there is a six hour gap between ceremonies that many of your guests might skip the first one and just attend the second one.

Also I'm not sure if you have alloted enough time to change your hair from a bun to the down style you want to do for the American Cermony. You may want to do a trial of that before setting times to see realistically how long that takes.

What I would consider doing is doing any photos you want for the vietnames wedding prior to the ceremony. That will knock out some time for photos in between. That would also give you the freedom of doing photos not at the ceremony location. Have a ceremony maybe around 2-3pm then. Then while you are off changing into your American Ceremony attire, host a cake & punch reception to entertain your guests. Then you can have your american ceremony & then guests can move on to cocktail hour while you do any additional photos.

Also plan out your photos very well, there is no need to do all the same photos with all the same people in both outfits. The last thing I'm going to suggest is to take into consideration the following items when it comes to expense:

-Will you be requiring your bridal party to have two different outfits? If so you need to disclose that to them when asking them & when asking them what their budgets are

-Will you be doing different flowers for each ceremony

-Will the parents be getting changed too

-Is there any way to combine the two cultures into a one ceremony, even if it's slightly longer?

Strawberry211chicago

Stop it. Really get engaged then re-evaluate as PP have said. 80 year old grandmother or not, you just need to take a step back.

Jen4948

Well, first, get engaged so you'll have something real to plan.

You have 4 photography sessions.  Cut at least 2 of those out-the session with cocktails in the middle of the reception makes no sense.  Also, a 90 minute gap between the ceremony and reception is rude to your guests.  What are they supposed to do while you're taking photos?

What is "Bride and Groom" between 11am and 12:30pm? Private time together?

And what is the "pre-ceremony" ? 

Regardless of an 80 year old grandmother and divorced parents, there are too many photo sessions here and too much time between events where apparently guests are not provided any hospitality but are expected to wait for the couple and family to finish taking photos or whatever they're doing to become available.

jennyforbes

Wow. Way to be seriously rude. 

Instead of assuming anything, maybe ask some questions, learn about other people's culture, and broaden your horizons. 

OP, are you referring to a Vietnamese tea ceremony? If so, this "timeline" is what a majority of Vietnamese (and Asian/interracial couples) do when they have a LONG DAY of tradition. This timeline is very vague so, I understand that you all don't understand, but you are obnoxious. I do agree with those that are saying plan when you are actually engaged. Enjoy your courting time, and then plan when the time is right.