How do I respond to this?

queenfinch

A few years ago, my old friend from elementary school got married. We were very close until about fifth grade, when I still loved books more than boys. No hard feelings there, we just grew apart. Well, I was invited to her wedding a few years ago, but I couldn't attend. I had just graduated college and started a new job out of state. Instead, I sent her a card. We hadn't really been in contact for years, save the one photo for old time's sake at our HS graduation.

Well, now it's my turn to get married and she's now working as a wedding coordinator. She was very sweet when I got engaged, and I planned on inviting her to the wedding. A few days ago, I got a very long facebook message from her asking me to hire her as my coordinator. She gave me the whole spiel - wedding magazines her company was featured in, that I should follow them on instagram, all that jazz. I feel like I've been put on the spot. The weddings she designs are incredible, but the price of just coordination is more than we had planned for the whole wedding! 

How do I respond to her? Do I respond at all, or just send the save the date as planned?

ladyamanuet

I would thank her for the offer, but let her know that you are planning a simpler affair and handling the planning yourself, and that you hope she will be able to attend.

sofakingmad

"Thank you for the offer, but we aren't hiring a wedding planner."

huskypuppy14

Don't do it. Just invite her as a guest. I had a similar issue when my sister's boyfriend wanted to do our wedding photography. I just didn't feel comfortable having a friend and guest do a job that intense. I wanted him to come as a guest, not work on our wedding day, so I declined. 

Also, what if something goes wrong it can ruin your friendship. It also seems like she's out of your price range anyway.

RebeccaFlower

Say it with me: NO. It sounds like she's being sweet so she can hit you up for money later. 

queenfinch

We're definitely not hiring her (or anyone!), I just want to say it nicely to not damage the relationship. 

Inkdancer

"You are so sweet for thinking of me! Unfortunately our budget is very limited and we would be unable to pay you what you deserve."

JCbride2015

I like @Inkdancer's wording.  Because you actually like the quality of her work-- it's just way outside your budget.  I would just add at the end "We hope you can attend as a guest!"

offensivekitten2

Yeah, she's going to lose interest if you mention a tiny budget. If for some freaky reson she still insists or lowers her price, tell her no anyway. Something like "I could never enjoy my wedding knowing you were working instead of relaxing and having fun".

cupcait927

I would be careful about saying that you wouldn't be able to afford her services. This might open the door for her to offer a discount or reduced pricing on certain services, making it even harder to say no. I like @DragonBlood 13 and @ladyamanuet's wording. Simple and doesn't leave room for argument or negotiation.

queenfinch

Thanks so much, ladies! I went a modified version of all that, thanking her for thinking of me and mentioning that we aren't hiring a planner at this time, but we hope to see her and her husband at the wedding!