Opening and Using Gifts?

jamiebrooke19

My fiance and I are getting married in September and we have 3 showers in August. I'm also moving into our new place in August and it's the first time I'm living without a roommate (at least until he moves in after the wedding). The majority of the gifts on our registry are the basic things we need for our kitchen and home. I know that you shouldn't use your gifts until after the wedding, but I will be living in basically an empty apartment with no appliances (toaster, microwave, or blender) because all those items are on our registry. If we get those items in August, would it be okay to open and use them before the wedding, or is it just tacky/bad to do that?

princessleia22

The general consensus seems to be that it is okay to use them ONLY IF you have the ability/funds to replace them, if needed.  If you use the gifts before wedding and something were to happen to cancel the wedding, you should purchase an identical item to return to sender.  If you are unable to do so, you shouldn't use the gift until after wedding.

Nobody plans to have wedding called off or have to return gifts, but it can and does happen, even if you are absolutely sure it could never happen to you. 

MyNameIsNot

There's two things about using the gifts. One, if the worst happens and the wedding doesn't happen, you'd have to return all those things. If you can afford to replace them, fine. If you would be returning used items, leave them in the box. Thing two, people say it's bad luck. I don't believe in luck, but some people do.

LondonLisa

jamiebrooke19 said:

My fiance and I are getting married in September and we have 3 showers in August. I'm also moving into our new place in August and it's the first time I'm living without a roommate (at least until he moves in after the wedding). The majority of the gifts on our registry are the basic things we need for our kitchen and home. I know that you shouldn't use your gifts until after the wedding, but I will be living in basically an empty apartment with no appliances (toaster, microwave, or blender) because all those items are on our registry. If we get those items in August, would it be okay to open and use them before the wedding, or is it just tacky/bad to do that?

I agree with PP- use them only if you can afford to pay back the giver in full immediately if, god forbid, the wedding doesn't go ahead. Also, with your three showers, there should be no guest overlap- ie, no one should be invited to more than 1 shower, and everyone invited to these 3 showers must be invited to the wedding. 

jamiebrooke19

Thank you so much for your reply! That makes a lot of sense about replacing the items if anything were to happen. I'll probably just wait because I do feel a little weird using them when they are for both my fiance and I. And since he won't be moving in until after the wedding, he won't get to enjoy everything with me, and enjoy the fun of having all new stuff!

All of my showers are with different groups/different cities, so I don't think I have any crossover. I am inviting all my bridesmaids and my mom to each one but letting them know they don't need to bring a gift! They have already done enough with buying their dresses and being apart of our big day

huskypuppy14

For the most part, I did not use any of the items we received as gifts. However, my FI birthday was last week, and I made him a cake, so I used the cake platter and a serving knife.  I wasn't going to not use them, because we weren't married yet (2 days!).  I think it's a use your judgement answer.  

Question for all you ladies: Has anyone received a gift back for a wedding that didn't happen?