So, I'm really considering firing my maid of honor. I would still like her to be a bridesmaid but im not sure how to go about this. When i told her i was getting married and starting to plan a wedding she was very excited for me and when i asked how she felt about possibly being the maid of honor all she said was, " i guess, if you want me to". When i called her back saying i thought it would be better if she would be a bridesmaid because i dint think she seemed excited or up to the task and that may be better suited for her she suddenly was like oh i am so excited and would love to be your maid of honor! However sense then, I've only gotten her to come hangout twice and its been two months. She will barely talk about wedding stuff and keeps making empty promises to help me. Shes always terribly busy and she does live 45 minutes away. Shes already told me that she looked it up online and that she doesn't need to plan or help with the wedding shower. I had already told her when she said she wanted to be my maid of honor that, that would be expected of her as well as the bachelorette party, a speech at the wedding, and helping me with picking things out like the venue, dresses, cake, etc. She doesn't have a job right now, and when i asked her what she was thinking about doing for the bachelorette party she said she wasn't sure. I suggested getting a limo and just going to a bar or maybe a trip to instead to Florida or California. Due to her lack of funds she told me a limo would be out of the question, let alone going out of state(Michigan). Lately I've been dropping hints of, maybe it would easier if you were a bridesmaid sense you live far, are pretty busy right now, and don't have the budget for a lot of things. She didn't seem to get any of my hints and keeps responding with its okay, well figure it out. I want this to be a big thing, I mean you (hopefully) only get married once. I don't feel comfortable coming out and saying "hey, your not cutting it, your fired" but ive said it so many ways and suggestions and hints that I'm not sure what to do. I don't want to loose her as a friend, or hurt her feelings but i just think that she cant handle this and my party might end up being on 9 mile in some dump. She seems to try to get out of as many responsibilities as possible, and its all looking a little overwhelming to me because for everything she doesn't want to do, that means more work for me, and that's getting hard because i have a 11 month old at home, collage classes still, a birthday party to plan and i just cant do it all. I just need someone who will help me plan things and be able to come and do things as least once a week but i can only get her out like twice or once a month if im lucky and when she does come, nothing gets done. Again, I've told her whats expected of her, but she still doesn't seem to understand what that means. Mind you none of my friends have gotten married and they're all pretty young, but i think i have a newer friend who would be much better at the task. Originally i dint ask her because i was worried my other friend would take offense sense we've been friends longer, but the fact that she didn't even seem excited has me worried! HELP! HELP! HELP!!