rethinking...everything!

ashwise

So I'm having major wedding issues lately. I was on a good path, was getting stuff done but now I'm rethinking everything and second guessing myself. I've been planning for over a year now, and a lot of my decisions like centerpieces, and favors etc. have all been made for almost a year. Now that I'm only 3 months out I'm beginning to second guess everything!!! Is this/has this happened to anyone else recently?? What did you do to get over it? Did you make changes???

jayjaay

Same here - I'm so outta of it. I'm just like done, not excited just don't care anymore. I'm hoping I'll feel better after my 1st fitting, blah

kebebb

I've convinced myself no less than five times in the past three weeks that I chose the wrong dress and the wrong shoes. I'm not going to get a different dress, I'm not that crazy, but I may end up buying different shoes. I'm in that place where I either don't give a crap about anything wedding related, or I can't stop thinking and obsessing over it. That's why we will never have everything ready. Because I'll go for weeks not caring.

Pepperally

Even though I haven't even been engaged that long, I think what you could be experiencing a sort of "wedding planning lull"...you have accomplished so much that you are ahead of the game and now you don't know what to do with yourself, so you start reconfiguring things in your mind just to stay in that planning/doing mindframe.  It does get sort of addicting to be planning and such and just busy doing things WR.  I'm in a lull myself.  Stay your course!  Keep your vision! 

beachyone15

Pepperally said:

Even though I haven't even been engaged that long, I think what you could be experiencing a sort of "wedding planning lull"...you have accomplished so much that you are ahead of the game and now you don't know what to do with yourself, so you start reconfiguring things in your mind just to stay in that planning/doing mindframe.  It does get sort of addicting to be planning and such and just busy doing things WR.  I'm in a lull myself.  Stay your course!  Keep your vision! 

This is me! Sometimes when I start to second guess things, I tell myself that everything will be beautiful, no one will notice the details as much as me, and that I get to marry my best friend which is the whole point!

TeddiD34

Stop overthinking it. Take a break from it. Know that the choices you've made we made for a reason. First instinct is always best. Don't bother wasting the $$ for something "better".

I agree with Pepperally. Stick to your guns, ladies  

rsbloom

I'm in the same boat, been planning for over a year and now starting to second guess the things we've decided on at the beginning.  I'm still doing other things, there's not a lull, but  that I'm trying to figure out how to make everything come together in the details, like does it match? does it matter if it matches perfectly or not?  Things like that.  

I keep telling myself, it would be $ wasted and more $ spent if I changed things now, which helps me stay on track.  

Pepperally

@rsbloom - I think that sometimes things can be too matchy-matchy...like a little bit overkill. And yeah, the extra $$ you might have to put in could definitely reinforce staying the course.

rsbloom

Exactly what I was thinking, which is why I'm trying to focus on things that aren't planned yet

jennhughes13

I'm so glad to hear that I'm not alone and I agree that it's got to be the wedding planning lull.  I'm so far ahead of the game that with nothing on my immediate "to do" list makes me start to over analyze and second guess everything I've done so far.  Deep breath, deep breath!  LOL!

Lauramae980

Sometimes I get panicked that I made odd choices. (Venue, family style food, big, poofy dress, etc) but then I remember that all my guests will care about is the food, music and booze. And getting a chance to talk to me and my FI. And then it's done! Day over and I am MARRIED. I cannot wait to be married!!!

des9724

This has happened to me several times over the past few months!  At one point, I was ready to throw everything out and start over.  NOT an option when you already put down deposits!  If I ever start to rethink, I just remind myself that I chose what I did for a particular reason.  I loved it at the time of decision-making, so there is a reason for it! 

tigger75

We've been engaged for over 2 years and I have always second guessed everything. But there are reasons behind my madness...my family is putting alot of pressure on me that everything is "just right" in their eyes so I haven't ever really felt like the day was about us as a couple. I'm trying to get to that point though. My advice to you is to stop second guessing! You made the choices you made because it was what YOU wanted! I'm sure it will be beautiful!

kebebb

Lauramae980 said:

Sometimes I get panicked that I made odd choices. (Venue, family style food, big, poofy dress, etc) but then I remember that all my guests will care about is the food, music and booze. And getting a chance to talk to me and my FI. And then it's done! Day over and I am MARRIED. I cannot wait to be married!!!

I've had the same thoughts about our reception venue and food choices, but in the end, it's us and that's what matters. We're having our reception at a racing museum that overlooks the racetrack where we met, and simple foods (pulled pork, bacon mac n cheese, scalloped potatoes, fresh veggies). I've gotten side-eye a couple times over the bacon mac n cheese, but whatever. We love us some bacon.

beachyone15

@kebebb Anyone who side-eyes you over bacon mac n' cheese is a damn fool. I'd be happy to eat their portion!

Pepperally

Indeed, @kebebb‌ , bacon Mac n cheese should never, ever be doubted or side eyed!!!

Lowell14

Pepperally said:

Indeed, @kebebb‌ , bacon Mac n cheese should never, ever be doubted or side eyed!!!

Agreed! If there is any side-eyeing of bacon Mac and cheese those people should be uninvited, etiquette be damned!

kebebb

Just means there will be more bacon mac n cheese for me!

ReturnToTiffany

It's perfectly natural to second guess yourself. I've done it and am sure most brides do. Don't worry, everything will turn out wonderful. The more you worry, the more you miss the point of enjoying one of the best days of your life. You won't be worrying about any of these things the day of and afterward you won't even care if things didn't match perfectly. Beauty is in the imperfections. Did someone say bacon Mac n cheese? Ooh yeah!