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Is this rude?

suorangesuorange member
First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
in Snarky Brides

I went to an event last Saturday with FH's coworkers. One of his coworker's girlfriends asked me how many carats my ring is. I have never met this girl or her boyfriend before! To me, this is the equivalent of asking someone how much the ring cost. I was taken aback and said I didn't know because it was my mother's diamond. Is this extremely rude or am I overreacting??

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Re: Is this rude?

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    emmaaaemmaaa mod
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    I think this is entirely rude and very presumptuous. That is not anyone's business as the carat size of a ring is not important. I will be honest when I say that I have no clue the carat size of my ring because it doesn't effect the importance of it. 

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    JasperandOpalJasperandOpal member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer First Comment
    It is very rude.  I like to tilt my head to the side and in my sweetest voice say "Carrots? I'm not a rabbit, its a diamond"  like I really don't know what they mean by their question.  
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    Marzipan13Marzipan13 member
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    slothiegal said:
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    I really don't know what it is about weddings/pregnancies that make people's manners go out the window.  Gee, thanks coworker for pointing out how "small" my ring is; no, I'm not going to "upgrade" when we're more "financially stable".  (I love my ring, thank you very much and oh, when did you start paying our bills and know our situation?  Oh, you didn't and you don't?  My bad.)  

    Also, so help me if/when I ever get pregnant and someone touches my belly.  I ain't got time to be going to court on an assault charge.
    FI and I talk about this all the time, now that our wedding is right around the corner.  Some people have no class!!  And I hear you about belly-touching - fingers / wrists / elbows will be broken if you touch my belly and we're not very close relatives or very close friends. 
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    AddieCakeAddieCake member
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    Yes.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Yes, it is rude.  The proper response is, "I'm so pleased that you like it."  As a teacher, students would occasionally ask me if my jewelry was "real".  (It usually was.)  This was the enigmatic response I gave them.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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    suorangesuorange member
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    Thanks everyone! I have some good ideas now if she and I happen to cross paths again...
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    larrygagalarrygaga member
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    goldchocobo said:
    You should be all like "I dunno.  How much do you weigh?  Oh, sorry, thought we were having contest to see who could ask the rudest question.  Wait!  Don't run away!  How's your finances and sex life?  I thought we were besties!!"  
    OMG I am so asking the next person who asks me how much they weigh. I love that. 

    You aren't rude and your response was fine! People are dumb. The only thing other people are ever allowed to say about your ring is how pretty it is. That's it!
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    goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 member
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    I always wonder why they want to know.  Like, are they an international diamond dealer or something?  Do they even understand what they are asking?  You could have a 50 carat ring but if it's cracked and flawed it's money wasted.  To me, cut and clarity are far more important.  Watch it sparkle, girl!  Enjoy your ring :)
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    suburbanstepmomsuburbanstepmom member
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    I believe this is rude.

    Furthermore, if someone asked me how many carats my ring was I would probably just look at them like they were dumb. Should I know the answer to that question? I guess it never occurred to me that I should know - all I know is that my FI gave it to me, it's pretty, and I love it. So whatever!

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    KatieinBklnKatieinBkln member
    First Answer First Comment First Anniversary 5 Love Its
    People suck. 

    Not the people here, though! I'm stealing @goldchocobo's phrasing henceforth. (I say that like people say rude shit to me all the time. The truth is, my resting bitchface usually preempts any strangers speaking to me out of turn).
    image
    This baby knows exactly how I feel
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    debbeaudebbeau member
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    I honestly did not know until I had to get the ring appraised for insurance and I loved it no matter what size it was. What do you way is a great come back. Wish I had it back then.
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    debbeaudebbeau member
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    I meant weigh.
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    thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I think it's rude that a complete stranger asked.  I will admit, I asked a coworker once, and I prefaced it by saying, "I know this is really tacky of me to ask so you don't have to answer, but I can't stop admiring your ring- how many carats is that?"  (It was over 2.)  She actually said she didn't mind answering since I wasn't a stranger, haha.  This was before I got engaged, and she knew my man and I were on that path, so truthfully it was coming from a need to have a frame of reference for my own ring shopping. She knew I wasn't judging or jealous--- it was a really fabulous ring. 
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    bananasplit472001bananasplit472001 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    Yes, it is incredibly rude.  Only those who care about materialistic things would ask that question.  The size of the ring does not equal how long a marriage will last.
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