Wednesday Chatter

Peaseblossom55

@swazzle sounds like so much fun I really want to do a road trip like that since I've never been up that way before.

LizzyTish88

My morning has been completely weird. 

First I killed a HUGE spider with Febreze. 

Then I get to work and my boss has completely emptied out his office? He had nic-nacks and pictures on the walls, and they are all gone! No one knows anything and he is supposed to be at a conferenceuntil next week so we won't know anything until Monday. It's SO weird. Like did he quit? And his chair is still in the bathroom... HAHA.

And today is the day I book Disney!! I'm so excited! 

labro

@buddysmom80 I'm sorry to hear you and FI are going through a rough time. These conversations are important to have whether you are married or not and it's definitely not BSC to talk about them now. I think counseling (for both of you) would be a great idea. FI and I are just now finishing up pre-marital counseling and we've really enjoyed it. There have been some things that will be difficult for us in the future (like we disagree about parents helping kids pay for college, I want to help and he doesn't) but a big part of the counseling is finding strategies to work through arguments and disagreements. Maybe the person officiating your wedding offers marriage counseling as well? It doesn't have to be religious (ours isn't).

@severmilli12 I hope your FI feels better soon! The stomach pains sound scary!

Today is just a regular work day for me. After work I'm going home and FI and I are going to paint two of our hallway doors and then go to the gym while they dry. So exciting right? Yesterday I bought wedding stamps for our invitations (yay!) and also picked up a form for our officiant to complete to certify that we've completed pre-marital counseling with him so we don't have to pay $60 for our marriage license. I really need to get back on track with addressing invitations. I've only done about 30 and I still have 50 left. I feel like we've been super busy lately and I just haven't had the time.

[Deleted User]

awww, I'm sorry you're having a rough patch, @buddysmom80.  *hugs*  I know when H and I hit a snag like that, I feel like it's the END OF THE WORLD...  but you guys will be able to work through it.  you both love each other and are committed to each other and want the absolute best for the other person, so you've just got to figure out some compromises.  hope you get to feeling better about everything soon!

how are the kittens, by the way??

justbeingme93

caseface5 said:

My morning has been completely weird. 

First I killed a HUGE spider with Febreze. 

Then I get to work and my boss has completely emptied out his office? He had nic-nacks and pictures on the walls, and they are all gone! No one knows anything and he is supposed to be at a conferenceuntil next week so we won't know anything until Monday. It's SO weird. Like did he quit? And his chair is still in the bathroom... HAHA.

And today is the day I book Disney!! I'm so excited! 

 Yes. You just made me laugh out loud in my office. I hate anything creepy crawly too. 

LizzyTish88

@justbeingme93 I thought about taking fire to him, but I like my house and wanted to keep it intact! 

Dignity100

@caseface5 - YAY Disney!!!!  I can't wait to book our next trip )

buddysmom80

@swazzle thanks for the love, it's okay about BB you guys are on a winning streak with bocce, so I forgive you.

@lapeanut1018 thanks for the advice. My JOP does not offer any sort of pre-marital counseling, there's an employee assistance program here at work where you can call a number, tell them what you need (it's actually pretty helpful, I got rates on discounted car rentals for when we go to Florida next year) and they'll hook you up with someone. I'll call them later when I have a chance. I think you're right about finding a way to come to an agreement. I always default to it being his way because to me, I think "well he's smarter, and he's the bread-winner in the house, so it's probably a good choice". Last night I told FI the last choice I've been able to make on my own was deciding which town to live in, and that was two years ago. So yeah, I mean we need to reach agreements together, but I shouldn't just default to what he wants to do.

@cocobellaf thanks for the hugs. The kittens are doing really well and they're getting big already, it's so sad! Quigley thinks our one kitten is a squirrel so he's going crazy trying to get to him, it should be interesting when everyone is integrated in the house.

ETA: thanks @twodimes I hope we get on the same page too!

KeptInStitches

@buddysmom80, I'm sorry you and FI are having problems. I hope you can get some help through counseling!

phira

I am so tired zzzzzz. A couple of experiments have been delayed till tomorrow, which sort of sucks and sort of doesn't; my boss might be less than happy, but regardless of the results, I won't be able to start up the next experiments till next week anyway, so ...

J is out for the night, so I'm going to go to the gym after work, and when I get home, I'm going to watch Hell's Kitchen with my best friend.

@severmilli12 I hope that your FI is okay. Is it early enough for him to maybe get an urgent care appointment instead of going to the ER? Honestly, the worst thing that could happen would be for him to go to Canada for four days and need medical attention up there. J's family has had that problem, and it usually ends up being SO difficult to do that they've sometimes driven all the way back to the states for medical care.

luckya23

That's a good idea, @phira - I love urgent care!

ShallowSeas

@phira Thanks.  I think we may try that. FI said that if he still had sharp, stabbing pains today while at work that he would go get checked out.  There is an urgent care across the street from his work so that may be where he goes.

bookishgiraffes

I didn't sleep well last night or something, because everything is sore like I slept in all of the wrong positions. So that combined with being sore from C25k is not fun. But the good news is I get to have lunch with one of my friends from school who still lives up here, so I'm not just waiting around for BF to get home. Then after lunch, I'm probably going to take a nice long walk (legs are too sore for running/jogging) and then send out more resumes. 

@severmilli12 I hope that your FI is okay! And I agree with going to urgent care. That's what I did with my stomach pains and they were great with figuring out what was wrong. 

[Deleted User]

stomach pains are nothing to mess with...  he really should go, ASAP!

ShallowSeas

@cocobellaf I agree but he is being stubborn because he doesn't want a huge ER bill   He thinks that because he doesn't have a fever, diarrhea, and isn't vomiting that its probably not appendicitis and so he doesnt really want to go get checked out. But it could also be his gallbladder. And even though he doesnt have a fever or vomiting yet, what if he gets those symptoms when he's on his way to Canada or in Canada? I wish health care didn't suck so much.

Blue & White

Happy Wednesday, all!  Lots of vibes to all the pains and sick SOs too!

I'm starting to apply for new jobs on Friday.  I'm pretty nervous about that, but hope that I'll figure that out soon.  I'm very excited to get out of retail though, so I can only hope for the best.

[Deleted User]

I'm just gonna say that I love all of you. I don't even know you, but it's nice being able to have anonymous-esque conversations with you.

Having said that. . . today blows.
- My dad is having heart surgery and I'm not there due to a meeting with VPs.
- My dog is an absolute sweetheart, but apparently yesterday his play put a wound in his daycare attendant's arm. They didn't give any info about him, so it's not on his record, but I'm not going to take him back. . . And it was SO NICE having him tired for at least one night a week. This young dog is wearing me out! . . Wish they could have told me this yesterday when I picked him up instead of calling me at work this morning!
- BF is insanely stressed about his job. I took him to an amazing (expensive) dinner last night and he couldn't even pretend to enjoy himself. Definitely didn't want to have sex. I don't know how to help him. He wants to vent, but then will get upset if I ask too many questions because he doesn't want to dwell on it or something. I wish I could help him relax. I wish he would get a new job! And I'll probably be meeting the boss causing all of this stress on Sunday and I don't know how in the hell I can force myself to be nice.

I just kind of want a hug. My BFF at work is gone today, so I don't know who to ask for one.

ShallowSeas

@TwoDimes I'm currently emailing back and forth with FI trying to convince him to go! I really really really hope he does. He's worried about the money but seriously, health > money.  I think i've almost got him talked in to going to the ER.

loves2shop4shoes

@buddysmom80, Big hugs to you.  All relationships go through peaks and valleys, so try not to stress out about it too much.  Get on the same page, and try to remember that you love each other and can work through differences of opinion.

I don't have much to add.  I got very little sleep last night.  I kept tossing and turning.  Things have been going really well in my marriage.  And last night, as I was trying to fall asleep, I was thinking about how happy I am with DH.  And then I started to freak out because you never really know how much time you really have on this Earth.  If something were to happen to DH, I really truly don't know what I would do.  I don't know how I'd live without him.  And it's just a scary thought.  I realize that this is morbid and likely unnecessary panicking.  We're both under 30, and at least statistically, we have many, MANY years together yet.  But you just never know.

Am I the only one that ever worries about this?

KeptInStitches

@EisleyJoGo and anyone else who needs it:

LizzyTish88

loves2shop4shoes said:

@buddysmom80, Big hugs to you.  All relationships go through peaks and valleys, so try not to stress out about it too much.  Get on the same page, and try to remember that you love each other and can work through differences of opinion.

I don't have much to add.  I got very little sleep last night.  I kept tossing and turning.  Things have been going really well in my marriage.  And last night, as I was trying to fall asleep, I was thinking about how happy I am with DH.  And then I started to freak out because you never really know how much time you really have on this Earth.  If something were to happen to DH, I really truly don't know what I would do.  I don't know how I'd live without him.  And it's just a scary thought.  I realize that this is morbid and likely unnecessary panicking.  We're both under 30, and at least statistically, we have many, MANY years together yet.  But you just never know.

Am I the only one that ever worries about this?

@loves2shop4shoes I have this worry sometimes too. I try to not let it bother me but it is very scary to think about. BF has those thoughts too, but more so about the dog. He is always asking me "how long do you think we have with her?" and I always tell him to make the time we do have with her count and not to worry about it. It's one of those facts of life things that just plain SUCK. 

loves2shop4shoes

@caseface5, I try to tell myself not to focus on it...and to just enjoy the time we have together.  But it's scary.  DH's father got sick and died at 38.  I really can't imagine being in my MIL's shoes.  And it scares the hell out of me.  The only downside of having something so great is the fear that one day, you'll lose it.

LizzyTish88

@loves2shop4shoes I hear that 100%. BF's dad and uncle both died in their early 50's so BF thinks he is doomed. They both had cancer so he is convinced that he is going to have cancer and die in his 50's. I have no idea what I would do with myself if that were to ever happen.

eilis1228

@loves2shop4shoes I have those thoughts too. I can't imagine life without FI, and it scares me to think about what I would do if he passed away unexpectedly. We should both be around for quite some time, but I'm always worried one of us will have some sudden medical emergency or car wreck or something. I think you phrased it well though when you said that the only downside to having something so great is the fear that one day you'll lose it. I think the dying issue especially rings true today though since so many people are posting about health problems. :-\

Peaseblossom55

@loves2shop4shoes I try not to think about it at all.  I couldn't imagine life without H, I don't know what I would without him. 

Blue & White

@caseface5 every male relative of my dad's died before they were 53. My dad is pushing 61. The main difference? My dad doesn't smoke 2 packs a day. So while genetics plays a huge role in life expectancy, so do life habits. Here's hoping your BF defies the odds too (plus by the time he's in his 50s, we will hopefully have a bit better medicine too!)

Blackbird230

First of all, all the hearts and hugs out to @severmilli12, @imcooper, @buddysmom80 and everyone else who needs it.

FI had his interview this morning for a school photography job. It's minimum wage and TONS of driving and a good amount of overtime, but it's a job and he could possibly move in with me if I don't lose my job myself. I'm calmer about it than I was yesterday. It's at a wait a see what the company does kind of time now.

phira

Look, everyone, I'm just going to declare today Officially Bullshit because so many of us are going through some really rough shit.

Blue & White

@phira SERIOUSLY!  I don't think I got the math teaching job so I just applied for a "science" one in hopes that it's for chemistry (BECAUSE WHY DON'T YOU POST THAT WITH THE JOB DESCRIPTION!?) because that's the only science I have taken the FL teaching test for yet, lol.  WINE FOR EVERYONE!!!!!

Also, I got my stitches out yesterday and now I have a gnarly looking scar on my ass.  So if anyone asks, I got bit by a shark on my ass or something.

eilis1228

@phira Agreed! Today is Bullshit Day! 

Hugs to everyone here who is dealing with a ton of stress today. I hope health improves, jobs are offered, and relationships are filled with lots of love and sex!