Dear Prudence,
A couple that my husband and I are friends with, “Steve” and “Jill,” have a disturbing habit of driving after drinking. They live pretty far out in the suburbs and often we’ll meet in the city for dinner. I’m not talking about one or two glasses of wine, but several bottles. There is no question that they are over the legal limit to drive. We’ve offered to drive, suggested hiring Uber, but they always insist on driving home. One year we took a group vacation to the beach and I was terrified to let them drive our family home after dinner one night and insisted we walk. My husband works with Steve at a small company, so we’ve never addressed this situation directly because it would make things awkward at work. But it’s gotten to a point where we don’t feel comfortable going out with them. There are lots of work-related social functions that we all attend, and it will become obvious that we’re avoiding them if we don’t make plans with them, plus we genuinely like them. They are otherwise responsible, conscientious, healthy people. What should we do?