Little kids and Facebook.

climbingsingle

I just received a friend request from FI's step-niece. She is 11 years old. Now, I really don't post anything too terrible on FB. I'm not uploading half naked pictures of myself. I'm not sharing videos that are inappropriate. But sometimes I curse. Sometimes I share a an article or something that wouldn't be appropriate for an 11 year old to read or see. Sometimes I comment on something or get tagged in things I would not want her to see. 

She's adorable and I love her, but that doesn't mean I want her to see everything on my Facebook page, you know? And also, isn't 11 really young to be on Facebook? Am I just old and out of touch? 

KeptInStitches

I agree that 11 is too young, but if you want to add her, could you add her to a list like acquaintances where she doesn't see everything you do, or block her from seeing your posts altogether? That's if you want to, of course.

beethery

I think 11 is actually against fb TOS if I remember right.

MegEn1

Lists are your friend.

I have a 'family' list that includes grandparents, aunts, uncles, older cousins for just that reason.

southernbelle0915

I have a group named "co-workers" in my privacy settings where they can see VERY limited information. I haven't gotten any requests like this, but if I did, they'd go straight into that category.

manateehugger

Yeah, I also have a "family" group that includes my 13 year old niece, my nosy annoying brother, and H's family members. They get shoved in there and basically only see what I want them to see. 

Marzipan13

I agree, 11 is way too young for some of the shit that can be dug up on Facebook (and why expose them to "Facebook drama" that early?).

I'd do what PPs suggested - put her in a list that has limited visibility.

lurkergirl

beethery said:

I think 11 is actually against fb TOS if I remember right.

This.  You're supposed to be 13. 

I'm surprised an 11 year old wants fb anymore.  My little sister wanted it, but my parents wouldn't let her have one early.  When she turned 13 last year, I was like, "So, are you getting your fb set up?"  She was like, "What kind of kid wants to hang out at the same place as there parents and grandparents?"  Point taken, sis!

climbingsingle

I'll put her in her own group. That's a good idea.

ifeelgoodifeelgreatifeelwonderful

I just wouldn't accept her. I coach kids and I won't let any of them add me on facebook. Like you, I'm not posting anything inappropriate but there's just so much info there and who knows what a friend will post to my wall, etc. Most of the girls (middle school age) though don't even use facebook so they talked me into signing into instagram to keep in touch, which I don't mind because I don't use it much. However, when I do sign into instagram, the types of posts teenage girls make are normally super annoying so I'm glad to not see it in my newsfeed on facebook

levioosa

I was a camp counselor for a bit and was in charge of a Jr. High age group. After the summer ended they all tried to add me on facebook. Like you I don't have anything "scandalous" on my timeline, but I still felt uncomfortable with it. I didn't accept them as friends. I did keep in touch with a few of my campers via email because it was camp policy to provide our campers with our emails in case they needed any advice or prayer, and a few of the girls really opened up over the course of the summer about issues they were going through.

Simply Fated

STFU did a series of posts where the moms asked their FB to tone it down because sometimes their snowflakes used their account.

I wouldn't accept, personally. I don't post anything scandalous, but I wouldn't risk a slip up.

climbingsingle

Simply Fated said:

STFU did a series of posts where the moms asked their FB to tone it down because sometimes their snowflakes used their account.

I wouldn't accept, personally. I don't post anything scandalous, but I wouldn't risk a slip up.

Yeah, that's totally bananas. I used to be part of a different forum, and some ladies decided to ask us to keep the cursing down to a minimum because sometimes their kids would read the forum. Uh, how about your just stop your kids from reading it? Why should I have to sensor myself? 

wrigleyville

I would accept if it were family, because I wouldn't want to hurt their feelings, but they'd go straight into my "Family" list. Most of my updates have a custom filter that excludes family. They only get to see the truly vanilla stuff.

yogablossom

I don't post anything insidious either, but my cousin's wife and her daughter (11 at the time) had friended me a while back so I accepted, thinking it would be a great chance to keep in touch since we live far away from each other.  Well, months later, I find that they both unfriended me. Uh...okay? I apparently had a profanity in one of my posts. I felt like messaging my cousin's wife being like "Good lord people, get over yourselves! And why the hell are you letting your 11 year old daughter use facebook anyway?!"

beethery

yogablossom said:

I don't post anything insidious either, but my cousin's wife and her daughter (11 at the time) had friended me a while back so I accepted, thinking it would be a great chance to keep in touch since we live far away from each other.  Well, months later, I find that they both unfriended me. Uh...okay? I apparently had a profanity in one of my posts. I felt like messaging my cousin's wife being like "Good lord people, get over yourselves! And why the hell are you letting your 11 year old daughter use facebook anyway?!"

Alert the popos! That's ridiculous!

hellohkb

Yeah, I don't quite understand younger kids on social media either. I have a few younger kids on my page. One girl in particular is kind of inappropriate with her usage. She is my sisters boyfriends little sister who I've known almost all her life. She is about 12 and apparently just got her first period, as she felt the need to alert every one on her Facebook about it. She also makes posts about her cramps and how people not to stop caring if she uses curse words in her posts, that she's old enough to do what she wants. Her mother seems to think it's cute. I have no problem accepting friend requests from younger kids I know irl because I dont want to hurt their feelings. It's just best to put them on a list so they can't see all of my posts. (ETA, TK just ate all my paragraphs)

AddieCake

I've had adults unfriend me for my FB profanity on my own page. Fuck you, then. It's not like you don't know me in real life. 11 is too young for social media.

KatieinBkln

Honestly, I wouldn't want to see what the KID posts. You'd have access to their entire social life/social set. The horrible spelling and grammar ALONE would have me blocking them. That and kids are notoriously bad at filtering themselves on social media, to their detriment. (Not that I don't know plenty of grown-ass adults who can't seem to stop themselves from posting stupid, rash, passive-aggressive, or otherwise unwise shit on a daily basis).

WinstonsGirl

I created a "teacher" FB just for this reason.  My students don't need to see my real FB, but they always want to add me.  I basically use it to promote school stuff (ie. don't forget it's PJ day tomorrow!!) and post some videos of me cheering and tumbling.  It gives them a glimpse into my life that give them a feeling of connection that still keeps them at an appropriate distance from my real life.  Only students and former students are on that account.  It's actually a nice way to keep in touch with some of them and see what they're up to after they leave my school