Combining thank you notes - yay or nay?

theartistformerlyknownas

FI and I got a wedding gift from his aunt and uncle within days of receiving the shower gift. Is it OK to thank them for both gifts in one card, or should I send a separate card for each gift since they were for different occasions? I feel like it would be strange to get two identical cards in the mail on the same day.

ETA if you skip the comments, I'm sending two.

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lolo883 said:

FI and I got a wedding gift from his aunt and uncle within days of receiving the shower gift. Is it OK to thank them for both gifts in one card, or should I send a separate card for each gift since they were for different occasions? I feel like it would be strange to get two identical cards in the mail on the same day.

Did the aunt attend the shower?  Were both gifts mailed?  How were the cards signed?   I need more info.

theartistformerlyknownas

PineapplePopsicles said:

lolo883 said:

FI and I got a wedding gift from his aunt and uncle within days of receiving the shower gift. Is it OK to thank them for both gifts in one card, or should I send a separate card for each gift since they were for different occasions? I feel like it would be strange to get two identical cards in the mail on the same day.

Did the aunt attend the shower?  Were both gifts mailed?  How were the cards signed?   I need more info.

Aunt attended the shower and brought the gift in person. I don't remember how she signed the shower card.  Wedding gift arrived in the mail, signed from both of them. The wedding gift actually arrived a day or two before the shower.

I thought I could say something like "thank you both for the wonderful shower and wedding gifts. Bla bla about the wedding gift bowls, much fancy. S, it was so lovely to see you at the shower, and bla bla about that gift. FI and I are looking forward to seeing you both at the wedding. Love, Lolo and FI"

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@lolo883  I would send the aunt a separate card, thanking her for the shower gift.  Make it a little more girly.  Then a joint thank-you for the wedding gift.  This way, the uncle feels like he wasn't just an add-on to the shower thank you, and the aunt feels properly thanked for "both" gifts.   I would love receiving 2 cards. i love mail.

[Deleted User]

PineapplePopsicles said:

@lolo883  I would send the aunt a separate card, thanking her for the shower gift.  Make it a little more girly.  Then a joint thank-you for the wedding gift.  This way, the uncle feels like he wasn't just an add-on to the shower thank you, and the aunt feels properly thanked for "both" gifts.   I would love receiving 2 cards. i love mail.

ditto this.  "Aunt, thanks for the shower gift.  Can't wait to use it doing this.  Thanks for coming to my shower.  The food was delish, wasn't it?  I'm going to have to get that recipe.  See you in a few weeks!"  and "Aunt and Uncle, thanks for the wedding gift.  It arrived safely in the mail a few days ago.  Can't wait to use it doing this.  Looking forward to celebrating with both of you at the wedding.  See you soon with your dancing shoes on."

theartistformerlyknownas

butterscotchjbeans said:

I have no idea how to proceed, but while I was lurking to learn a bit,  I realized you get married in 3 weeks! AHHHHHHH! I am excited for you, since you are so active and funny, can't wait to hear more. 

Sorry I couldn't help! 

Aww thank you!! That's so sweet.

Le sigh. OK, two cards it is.

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lolo883 said:

butterscotchjbeans said:

I have no idea how to proceed, but while I was lurking to learn a bit,  I realized you get married in 3 weeks! AHHHHHHH! I am excited for you, since you are so active and funny, can't wait to hear more. 

Sorry I couldn't help! 

Aww thank you!! That's so sweet.

Le sigh. OK, two cards it is.

**********

This is a FWP

theartistformerlyknownas

PineapplePopsicles said:

lolo883 said:

butterscotchjbeans said:

I have no idea how to proceed, but while I was lurking to learn a bit,  I realized you get married in 3 weeks! AHHHHHHH! I am excited for you, since you are so active and funny, can't wait to hear more. 

Sorry I couldn't help! 

Aww thank you!! That's so sweet.

Le sigh. OK, two cards it is.

**********

This is a FWP

COMPLETELY. Whiny bride who needs to STFU problem. Thanks for calling me on it.

PineapplePopsicles

@lolo883 i wasn't calling you whiny at all!!!  I was just saying, this is such a fun problem to have!  "Geez, I have so many presents... how many thank you notes do I write?".  Being a bride can be so fun sometimes!

theartistformerlyknownas

PineapplePopsicles said:

@lolo883 i wasn't calling you whiny at all!!!  I was just saying, this is such a fun problem to have!  "Geez, I have so many presents... how many thank you notes do I write?".  Being a bride can be so fun sometimes!

Oh I'm totally calling myself whiny! It's a great problem to have, especially considering they bought all 12 pieces of our fine china soup bowls. That totally deserves its own thank you card that I got for free and however-much-stamps-cost-now stamp.

ETF spelling

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@lolo883 mmmm soup

Jen4948

I'd send separate thank-you notes, since you received the gifts for separate occasions.

tigersgirlgv

You can always hold one of the thank you notes for a couple of days, so that they don't get delivered the same day.

huskypuppy14

I had a similar situation for 2 different people/ couples and I did 2 different things. 

Aunt A came to my shower and gave a small gift. On the shower card it said your real shower and wedding gift will arrive in the mail. 2 days later I received the rest of my china from her and her husband. I wrote them a nice long note thanking them for the china, it was nice to see Aunt A at the shower blah blah blah. I didn't see anything wrong with this because the presents were combined.

Now Aunt B had sent a gift (also china) about a week prior to the shower. I didn't know if she was coming or not, so I wrote a thank you note right away. Then at the shower she gave me another gift so I sent her another thank you note thanking her for coming to the shower, thanks for the gift that she gave at the shower, and thanking her again for the china she sent the week before. 

Now for my parents I ended up writing them 3 different thank you notes. One to my mom for her shower gift and helping host the shower. One long one to my parents prior to the wedding that we gave them at the rehearsal dinner. And another shorter one after we got some pictures back and gave them an album. They paid for the majority of our wedding and helped with a lot of things, so I thought it was appropriate to thank them profusely for their generosity. 

ETA: Now that I think about it, for my parents it was actually 3 separate gifts at different times, so I had to write 3 separate notes anyway.

 The shower gift thank you, the wedding thank you, and they also gave us a substantial amount of money for a wedding gift in addition to the wedding money. So three notes. 

RebeccaB88

While I do think that 2 notes is the most proper thing to do, as a guest I honestly would not care if I got a combined note or not. I'd be just so happy that I GOT a thank you note, you could thank me for anything and I'd be happy. I wouldn't even care if you wrote it on notebook paper with crayon. If I get a note, it's all good.

theartistformerlyknownas

I have already sent my dad 3 thank you notes - for my dress and invitations, an early wedding gift, and shower gift. He'll get at least one more. They were all spread out though!

lovesclimbing

Honestly, I would just send one.  I had a shower that was just four days before the wedding.  I sent combined thank yous to everyone who gave a shower gift and a wedding gift.

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

I don't think there's a wrong way to do it per se, unless your aunt and uncle were living apart or something.  I'd sent one note with a longer message inside acknowledging both shower and wedding gifts.  Two notes is fine too but I'm just thinking about how if it was me and I got two cards, I'd wonder why this all couldn't be put on one card (but I'm all about saving stamps so yeah...