Snarky Brides

Unprofessional Vendor Vent

edited October 2014 in Snarky Brides
When it comes to wedding gown shopping (or any kind of shopping that involves people helping me), I'm a pretty laid-back, easygoing person. If possible, I like to get in and out of a store without too much assistance. Of course, you do need some extra help when shopping for wedding wardrobe, but my point is that I don't expect to be waited on by consultants or treated like a princess. I also don't need excessive compliments or want anyone to gush over me. I get that I'm just "another bride" and not some special wedding snowflake. However, I do expect common courtesy from people who want me to give them money for their services and product.

In search of the perfect dress for my wedding, I visited a few boutiques (ranging from well-known bridal stores like Kleinfeld to small ma-and-pa operations in the middle of nowhere, all offering different dress prices, designers, etc.) I'd like to think that I've had some varied (but mostly very positive) experience when it comes to bridal shopping that by the time I went into this place (also somewhat higher-end and well-known - or so I've been told) I knew what to expect. That's why I was completely shocked by the unprofessional attitude of this consultant (I'm not sure if I can even call her this).

I gave her a budget. What did she do? Bring a dress way over budget and actually tried to convince me that my budget didn't really matter because it was a perfect dress for me. It wasn't really, by the way. Which I told her. Then what did she do? Just kept pushing that dress over and over again without presenting me with any other options. Well, there were a few others, all of which didn't meet my criteria of dress I was looking for, so...

She wasn't simply pushing the pricey dress it in an overly enthusiastic, fake manner, but she was actually rude about it, telling me I would make a mistake if I didn't buy the dress right now because it was a big mistake to wait so long and no other store would accommodate my timeline (yes, I'm pushing it, but all other stores had no problem accommodating an 8+ month timeline). 

Not once did she smile the entire appointment and rolled her eyes as if she had somewhere else to be - which considering the phone attached to her hand, she clearly did. I would tell her something I was concerned about (they made custom dresses so I assumed we could talk about making changes for a cost, of course) and she would tell me that I had no idea what I was talking about. 

The biggest issue that made me decide to leave came in the changing room. She was already super unhelpful, so it didn't surprise me that she didn't bother helping me get out of my dress or failed to answer when I asked for help with the clamps I couldn't reach. But then I turned around (in my undies and nothing else in front of a floor-length mirror, by the way) and she was texting on her phone. After telling us that we're not allowed to use our phones in fear that we might try to steal the designer's design. How about the fact that you may very well be texting my photo to whomever you're talking to right now, lady?! Okay, I know that she most likely (and hopefully!) wasn't, but still...ugh. Texting on the phone while your client is struggling in and out of dresses is crappy enough, but while I'm standing there in the changing room with you, practically naked? Blech!

Of course, she wouldn't let us leave until we committed to the dress. OF COURSE, we didn't! The good news? I did go to another place and found my dress with the help of a consultant I absolutely loved. She went above and beyond what I expected, was so down-to-earth, honest, kind, understanding, fun...a crappy experience thankfully turned into something positive. 

Anyway, I hope this was the right place to vent about such a silly thing. Do you guys have any unprofessional vendor stories that are hopefully just a distant memory now? ;)

EDITED B/C paragraphs decided to vanish - yikes.
Also, I just realized...HOLY BRACKETS. Sorry peeps.

Re: Unprofessional Vendor Vent

  • Was she the owner or manager?  If not, I'd complain to whoever is about your experience. 

    If she is, I'd also consider giving the place a bad review.
  • Ugh, either way I'd give the place a bad review.

    My worst was also a bridal shop - the consultant asked me what style I was looking for. Didn't ask about price point. Every time I brought it up, she said it wasn't important. Really now?
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  • Leave reviews EVERYWHERE!  And I would call the manager about the person; they should know their "consultants" are driving away customers.

    My worst experience was at David's Bridal.  First, they couldn't find my appointment in the system, but I could "look around" until someone opens up.  I waited 30 mins then rescheduled.  

    Take two: my "consultant" was assigned 2 other customers for the same time slot, so there was a looong wait between dresses, made even longer by her disappearing in the back to "get something real quick" which resulted in an extra 6-8 min wait, we were timing, just for her to come back with something for a different bride, or nothing at all, so she had to go back because she "forgot."

    So, after 4 hours, I found a dress I LOVED, but I wanted my mom to see it first.  BUT when we went back with my mom a week later, a different consultant told me it was a "preview dress" and no longer available for order.  WHY WAS I NOT TOLD LAST WEEK!?!?

    Needless to say, I complained to the manager and left terrible reviews about that "consultant."
  • edited October 2014
    Jen4948allispain, @rsbloom - I was just writing up a review, but thought it would be a good idea to vent a little first and post a more coherent review. I will also get in touch with the manager - no one was there on the day.

    allispain, apparently we had the same consultant. It's all those million we have to spend on our dress - who cares, right?

    Sorry to hear about your negative experience, rsbloom. Bad service is horrible enough, but then to find the dress of your dreams and be told you can't have it...grr. Did you manage to find it somewhere else or did you go with a different one?

  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited October 2014
     walked into 2 places.  I said "I'm having a beach wedding.  I do not want a train, beading, bling, lace or a veil.  I would like a strapless with a corset back"     Both places showed me dresses that had everything I didn't want.    Because you know, I didn't mean I didn't want all that stuff.    They were all "just try it on. You really do want all that stuff".  Umm, no. I know that I do not want a cathedral length train with full sleeves and tons of beading for my beach wedding.   Talk about being hot from all that stuff?  Geez.  

    The 3rd place I went to I said the same thing.   The consulted brought over my dress.  It was EVERYTHING I asked for.   It did have a small train.  Know what she said?   "We can easily put in a permanent bustle for you."   SOLD!

       Now it was a few hundred over our semi-budget.  I say semi because it was nothing really set in stone, more like a guideline.    She did try to sell me a veil. I don't blame her, she works on commission.  I put it on and she said "no, veils are not really you".   That was the end of the discussion.  






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • lyndausvi said:
     walked into 2 places.  I said "I'm having a beach wedding.  I do not want a train, beading, bling, lace or a veil.  I would like a strapless with a corset back"     Both places showed me dresses that had everything I didn't want.    Because you know, I didn't mean I didn't want all that stuff.    They were all "just try it on. You really do want all that stuff".  Umm, no. I know that I do not want a cathedral length train with full sleeves and tons of beading for my beach wedding.   Talk about being hot from all that stuff?  Geez.  

    The 3rd place I went to I said the same thing.   The consulted brought over my dress.  It was EVERYTHING I asked for.   It did have a small train.  Know what she said?   "We can easily put in a permanent bustle for you."   SOLD!

       Now it was a few hundred over our semi-budget.  I say semi because it was nothing really set in stone, more like a guideline.    She did try to sell me a veil. I don't blame her, she works on commission.  I put it on and she said "no, veils are not really you".   That was the end of the discussion.  

    SITB

    This is what all places should be like. The place where I bought my dress, the consultant was super respectful of my budget - she wouldn't even let me look at the racks that were outside of it, and when she brought in the second dress for me to try on (which is the one I chose) she prefaced it with - "Just so you know, this one is only half your budget normally, and it's on sale for the next two weeks, so it's even less!" The one time she had me try on a dress that was at my budget (not even over, but at my max) she warned me before she pulled it out of the bag and asked if that was even okay. Then she was the first one to say "I don't think it's you" to that one (which I totally agreed with - I only even tried it on because it was a style my friend who was with me thought I should try).
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  • edited October 2014
    lyndausvi said:
     walked into 2 places.  I said "I'm having a beach wedding.  I do not want a train, beading, bling, lace or a veil.  I would like a strapless with a corset back"     Both places showed me dresses that had everything I didn't want.    Because you know, I didn't mean I didn't want all that stuff.    They were all "just try it on. You really do want all that stuff".  Umm, no. I know that I do not want a cathedral length train with full sleeves and tons of beading for my beach wedding.   Talk about being hot from all that stuff?  Geez.

    Yay for beach weddings. Boo for consultants who don't listen. I couldn't even imagine dragging a train on the beach! PS: I love corset backs.

    The 3rd place I went to I said the same thing.   The consulted brought over my dress.  It was EVERYTHING I asked for.   It did have a small train.  Know what she said?   "We can easily put in a permanent bustle for you."   SOLD!

    I feel that the right consultant can really make a huge difference. And, honestly, how hard is it to just listen? Sure, they might not have anything you want in the store, but there is no reason that they should push dresses you don't want onto you.

    Now it was a few hundred over our semi-budget.  I say semi because it was nothing really set in stone, more like a guideline.    She did try to sell me a veil. I don't blame her, she works on commission.  I put it on and she said "no, veils are not really you".   That was the end of the discussion.

    The consultant I ended up buying from presented a dress twice the cost of the one I was going to get and a completely different style (after checking with us price-wise and saying we were going to humor my family who really wanted to see me in that style) and we all actually loved it, but it simply wasn't the one. It would have been my second choice and I could totally see how a bad consultant might try to push for it since it did look great and we were all gushing over it, but then she said to us that I looked much happier in mine and should go with that instead. Just like with you and the veil - it made me feel so good about buying from her. She wanted me to be happy and comfortable, not just to make a sale.

    I also had a semi-budget, but was very firm about it at that fishy place as I just had a feeling she would try to go much higher.
  • Why didn't you leave after like ten seconds of that shit??? They clearly don't want your business!
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  • edited October 2014
    larrygaga said:
    Why didn't you leave after like ten seconds of that shit??? They clearly don't want your business!
    I have a problem of being too ppolite that I'm working on overcoming in situations where I'm very clearly being taken advantage of. :S

    However, I did leave after ten minutes (when the phone thing occurred), so at least I didn't stay for the full appointment.

    It was clearly ten minutes too long. The whole time I was like "Run, Forrest, Run!" in my head.
  • That consultant deserves to be fired. Unbelievably unprofessional.  Why was she even in the dressing room if she wasn't helping you. Did you have anyone with you (a friend or your mom?)

    I had a wonderful bridal consultant at the only store I went to.  


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  • edited October 2014
    That consultant deserves to be fired. Unbelievably unprofessional.  Why was she even in the dressing room if she wasn't helping you. Did you have anyone with you (a friend or your mom?)

    I had a wonderful bridal consultant at the only store I went to.  


    Yes, my mom was there and she felt the same way.

    She was fairly stern and straightforward when it came to the lady's B.S., but I think she held back a little because:

    1.) She didn't want to embarrass me. <- This lady was embarrassing herself enough for all of us.

    2.) She didn't want to prevent me from getting the dress by being negative in case it turned out to be my "dream dress" (it was nice enough, but we both said when we left the store that it wouldn't have been worth dealing with that mess even for the perfect dress).

    3.) She was only witness to the lady's rudeness outside of the change room - which wasenough to leave a horrible bad impression on her.

    I'm so happy with my current consultant. She's a gem. Glad you found someone good as well. :D
  • lyndausvi said:
     The 3rd place I went to I said the same thing.   The consulted brought over my dress.  It was EVERYTHING I asked for.   It did have a small train.  Know what she said?   "We can easily put in a permanent bustle for you."   SOLD!

    I feel that the right consultant can really make a huge difference. And, honestly, how hard is it to just listen? Sure, they might not have anything you want in the store, but there is no reason that they should push dresses you don't want onto you.

    So much this. The right consultant can make such a difference.

    I went to the same store on two different days, the first to try on stuff and the second with my Mom to make a decision. The first time we went we had this really great consultant who picked things not exactly my style, but they looked great on me. And they were things I liked, just not things I would have picked for myself. 

    The second time we had a perfectly nice lady, but she obviously had a very different idea of style (and possibly didn't read my preferences/listen to my words). Nothing she pulled for me (other than the one I wanted to re-try on) was what I was looking for. I was amazed how two different people could change the experience so much. And neither was bad, mean, or rude.
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  • I can understand the idea behind bringing out dresses that deviate from a bride's stated preferences. I certainly tried a few dresses in different silhouettes/fabrics than I originally envisioned myself in. But I think there's a limit, and I think you have to show that you made a good faith effort to listen by bringing the bride a few dresses that completely conform to her stated wishes at first.

    Then, I would have (and did have) no problem with hearing, "okay, this one is slightly more A-line (or has cap sleeves, or has a train but don't worry, we can remove or shorten it) but I have a feeling you might really like it, do you want to try it on?" I had several excellent consultants who did this for me, and they were always very nice dresses and I could tell why they picked them, AND they left it to me whether I wanted to try it on or not. 

    Regardless, the OP's consultant sounds like a total idiot and was completely unprofessional. Blast that shizz on Yelp!
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    This baby knows exactly how I feel
  • I had a great consultant at David's Bridal. She was super busy and had other brides also, but her timing for when I needed her was impeccable.  I initially told her I did not want anything strapless.  She suggested I at least try on one strapless dress because I might be surprised.  Well...lo and behold...I was so glad I listened to her.  The strapless styles with an A-line skirt were absolutely the most flattering on me, lol.

    Although not wedding related, I had a similar experience to the OP when I was looking for a short-term rental in Miami.  My real estate agent was SO intent on trying to SELL me a condo...even though he knew full well I would only be in Miami for a few months...that I felt like I had entered some alternate reality every time I talked to him.  An alternate reality where "I have no interest in buying, I am only looking for a rental"...really meant "Of course I want to buy a condo!  Tell me all about the base bottom prices you have for any one of the five new developments you have already mentioned to me, ad nauseam."

    It was just astounding!  He was just so focused on what HE wanted to sell me...he did not listen to one word I said about what I needed or wanted.

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  • I had a great consultant at David's Bridal. She was super busy and had other brides also, but her timing for when I needed her was impeccable.  I initially told her I did not want anything strapless.  She suggested I at least try on one strapless dress because I might be surprised.  Well...lo and behold...I was so glad I listened to her.  The strapless styles with an A-line skirt were absolutely the most flattering on me, lol.

    Although not wedding related, I had a similar experience to the OP when I was looking for a short-term rental in Miami.  My real estate agent was SO intent on trying to SELL me a condo...even though he knew full well I would only be in Miami for a few months...that I felt like I had entered some alternate reality every time I talked to him.  An alternate reality where "I have no interest in buying, I am only looking for a rental"...really meant "Of course I want to buy a condo!  Tell me all about the base bottom prices you have for any one of the five new developments you have already mentioned to me, ad nauseam."

    It was just astounding!  He was just so focused on what HE wanted to sell me...he did not listen to one word I said about what I needed or wanted.

    I had a similar experience about 5 years ago when I was looking for an apartment to rent.

    I wanted a 1st or 2nd floor in a two or three family house (not an apartment/condo building) with an outdoor space and laundry in the building.

    I get shown an apartment in a apartment building on the 3rd floor with no laundry and no deck. Seriously, you gave me nothing I wanted!  I actually told they guy, why are you showing me this?

    I ended up using another real estate agent. It only hurts them.
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  • I had a great consultant at David's Bridal. She was super busy and had other brides also, but her timing for when I needed her was impeccable.  I initially told her I did not want anything strapless.  She suggested I at least try on one strapless dress because I might be surprised.  Well...lo and behold...I was so glad I listened to her.  The strapless styles with an A-line skirt were absolutely the most flattering on me, lol.

    Although not wedding related, I had a similar experience to the OP when I was looking for a short-term rental in Miami.  My real estate agent was SO intent on trying to SELL me a condo...even though he knew full well I would only be in Miami for a few months...that I felt like I had entered some alternate reality every time I talked to him.  An alternate reality where "I have no interest in buying, I am only looking for a rental"...really meant "Of course I want to buy a condo!  Tell me all about the base bottom prices you have for any one of the five new developments you have already mentioned to me, ad nauseam."

    It was just astounding!  He was just so focused on what HE wanted to sell me...he did not listen to one word I said about what I needed or wanted.

    I had a similar experience about 5 years ago when I was looking for an apartment to rent.

    I wanted a 1st or 2nd floor in a two or three family house (not an apartment/condo building) with an outdoor space and laundry in the building.

    I get shown an apartment in a apartment building on the 3rd floor with no laundry and no deck. Seriously, you gave me nothing I wanted!  I actually told they guy, why are you showing me this?

    I ended up using another real estate agent. It only hurts them.
    Come on, ladies! The condo that doesn't meet any of your wishes also comes with a complimentary wedding dress that doesn't match your style. It's SUCH A GOOD DEAL! ;)

    I'm sure you can tell I feel a lot better after venting and hearing I wasn't the only one with psycho consultant/confused realtor/insert-someone-trying-to-get-your-money-here.

    Thank you all for sharing your stories!
  • The BEST consultant that I worked with and bought my dress from didn't even ask me what I liked. Instead she asked what I hated. That worked out so much better for me.
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