Looking for some feedback....

marg1046

I'm not necessarily looking to find an answer for my...."dilemma". Although, its not quite to dilemma stage yet, but I could see it getting there as the "big day" approaches, or after it's done.  I'm really looking for anyone who would be willing to share their story, or thoughts on mine.

 I am a medium build woman.  I am shorter (5'3") and I've always been on the chunkier side, ever since I can remember. I eat well most days, stay quite active (bowling, walks, working out), but my metabolism just likes to stay and the slow and easy pace for some reason.  Like I'm sure any other person, I have my good days and my bad days.  There's days where I'm like "yeahhh I look goood" and there's days where, well usually when i see myself in a picture and I'm like "My arms look like THAT?!?!"

So here's what I'm mainly struggling with: On a day to day basis, I enjoy myself and my looks.  But I dont know what it is....but when I see myself in a picture I just do not like how I look.  I feel like the way I see myself even in a mirror, is not a bad image. But as soon as that camera takes a shot, my arms are the size of elephants and I have 4 chins. I'm wondering, do I just have a skewed self perception of myself...and I really only see what I "really" look like when I can look at myself from the outside? (like in a picture) Or is it that I'm just being overly critical of myself in a photo.

Does anyone else deal with this or am I just weird? ha ha, could be both.

Thanks in advance for any feedback.

Maggie0829

First, hi name twin!!

Second, I get where you are coming from.  I rarely like how I look in pictures.  I always look like I have dark circles under my eyes and my hair is so blah and my face looks fat, etc, etc.  We are always the hardest on ourselves, aren't we?  So most likely you are being overly critical of yourself in photos because the photo doesn't move and you have the time to really look at it and analyze every single thing and then you start seeing things that really aren't there.

Anyway, I was worried about my dislike of myself in pictures when my wedding was approaching. I loved our photographer and the pictures she takes but I was still worried about how I was going to look in them.  Well, I loved and still love how I look in them.  I have very rarely felt uber pretty in my life but my wedding day was one of those rare occurrences.  My hair was done, my makeup was done, I was wearing a dress that I loved and marrying a man that I loved even more then the dress (it was a pretty close call though).  All of that put together equaled me looking and feeling my best ever and that was apparent in the pictures.

So stop stressing and realize that when you really happy and feel really pretty (which you will because all brides are glowing and beautiful on their wedding day) that the pictures will capture that.

peachy13

I absolutely loathe the way I look in photos and am nervous about this as well, but like Maggie said, you're all done up with pretty hair and makeup in a pretty dress, and with a natural glow since it's your wedding and you're happy. Your photographer will absolutely capture your beauty.

I honestly have yet to see wedding pictures where the bride looks "bad."

weddingcactus

Oh I absolutely deal with this. My most common problem is looking at a picture and think "Ugh, I look fat.", but sometimes it's just "Why did I squint my eyes so much there?" or "What was going on with my hair that day?" I'm sorry I don't have all the answers, but I can sympathize and maybe give a few suggestions. 

I could be wrong, but I really do think that sometimes a picture distorts an image. Whether it's capturing light/shadow as my eye isn't seeing it (such as a big shadow under my belly in a wedding dress sample) or simply making me look more broad than I really think I am. I think a professional photographer (especially a wedding photographer) is going to be skilled and equipped to take much better pictures than my phone or point and shoot camera. They know how to manipulate lighting with proper camera settings and flash and should be able to take beautiful pictures of anyone.

Finally I think sometimes you have to learn to pose for the camera. If you're seeing multiple chins, maybe you need to keep your chin up/out more when you're posing. Trust me when I say that just about anyone can make themselves look like they have multiple chins if they are tucking their chin down/in while smiling. Find your favorite angles for your face and try to use them to your advantage. Try holding your arms a little away from your body. If they're slack and against your body, sometimes even muscle can make the arms look fat. Similarly, positioning your hips and legs a certain way will look more or less slim. I'd recommend practicing posing in a full length mirror or having a friend take pictures while you pose and looking at them. Hopefully a good photographer will help coach you in this, but you might try practicing on your own. 

All in all, I think you're going to love your wedding pictures. Try not to stress too much and trust your photographer.