Cut Colleagues?

raeyle

Please bear with me while I explain. I am a teacher. I work in a small school and have been there for the past 4 years. At any one time, there are only 8 teachers(including me), 3 persons in admin, and 5 in auxiliary. 

I know all members of staff but am not close to all of them. Out of the 7 other teachers, I am closer to 5( as in we hang out outside of work), and 2 transferred in at the beginning of this school year. Now I don't think the auxiliary staff would be too put out if I don't invite them since we have a friendly relationship but are not "friends". But the other teachers I am not too sure about. 

Do you think it is okay to invite the 5 teachers I am close to, plus the admin- principal, deputy principal and curriculum coordinator? Or should I just invite all of the teaching staff and admin? I don't know what to do. I do have a budget as well and i'm trying to have some control over numbers.

yates2015

I feel like these are people you would never speak to if you weren't working with them, therefore there is no reason to have them at your wedding. 

penguin44

I would invite the 5 teachers. I would not invite admin you don't see outside of work. 

theartistformerlyknownas

Ditto PPs. Invite those you are close to. This isn't a "circle" you need to invite all of. Just make sure you keep the wedding talk to a minimum in front of those who aren't invited.

JoanE2012

raeyle said:

Please bear with me while I explain. I am a teacher. I work in a small school and have been there for the past 4 years. At any one time, there are only 8 teachers(including me), 3 persons in admin, and 5 in auxiliary. 

I know all members of staff but am not close to all of them. Out of the 7 other teachers, I am closer to 5( as in we hang out outside of work), and 2 transferred in at the beginning of this school year. Now I don't think the auxiliary staff would be too put out if I don't invite them since we have a friendly relationship but are not "friends". But the other teachers I am not too sure about. 

Do you think it is okay to invite the 5 teachers I am close to, plus the admin- principal, deputy principal and curriculum coordinator? Or should I just invite all of the teaching staff and admin? I don't know what to do. I do have a budget as well and i'm trying to have some control over numbers.

Invite the people you are close too.  As long as you're not excluding just one or two people, you're fine.  Don't forget that you need to include any significant others of the coworkers you invite.  

thisismynickname2

Probably for most people's budgets, if you don't socialize with someone outside of work, don't invite them. 

abbyj700

I had a similar issue as I work in a very small office. I eventually decided if they haven't been to my home, they aren't close enough to be invited. And it worked perfectly. No one seems upset about not being invited - though I work with a bunch of really awesome dudes who like hearing about my wedding but really don't care that they aren't invite. 

danamw

Putting myself in the place of the non-close, uninvited people:

I would be surprised if you asked me to your wedding, as we are not close. I would feel you were inviting me to be polite, not because you really want me there.

I would think nothing negative if I was not invited. I would understand inviting only people you are close to.

[Deleted User]

For my wedding, I only invited co-workers that I hang out with outside of the office. I didn't feel obligated to invite any of the management as I don't talk to them outside of work. I have plenty of co-workers who have gotten married to that I talk to every day but didn't get invitied to their weddings. I wasn't upset at all because I figured, we're not friends outside of the office, we only talk because of our jobs, so why would I get invited. Once in a great while, someone will feel the need to say, I'm sorry I wish I could invite you but we're limited and my response is, that's ok I totally understand, just bring in some photos so I can see how great you looked.

AddieCake

Initially, I planned to invite only the teachers in my department so the lines would be clear and nobody's feelings could get hurt. But then I said fuck it because I am friends with and did things outside of school with people from other departments. So I invited any of the teachers I am close to and didn't invite the others. And I don't regret it at all.

WinstonsGirl

I also invited only the teaching staff and spouses of the people I hang out with outside of work.  That was 1 teacher and no one else - dept colleagues, admin, support staff, etc.  We've been friends since before we started working at that school too