Reception Ideas

Barn Wedding Questions!

Hello!

My fiance and I are recently engaged and looking to book a barn venue for a rustic wedding. Any bride that has done this before, I'm sure knows the struggles of finding an affordable venue. My question is- most of the venues I have found do not have bathrooms, meaning we would have to rent a port-a-john. Has anybody done this before? It may sound silly, but I can't see myself using a port-a-john at a wedding, especially in a wedding gown.

Has anybody had to deal with this before?

Any input would be appreciated. Thank you! 

Re: Barn Wedding Questions!

  • plainjane0415plainjane0415 The hills of Tennessee
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    edited November 2014
    duscraa said:
    Hello!

    My fiance and I are recently engaged and looking to book a barn venue for a rustic wedding. Any bride that has done this before, I'm sure knows the struggles of finding an affordable venue. My question is- most of the venues I have found do not have bathrooms, meaning we would have to rent a port-a-john. Has anybody done this before? It may sound silly, but I can't see myself using a port-a-john at a wedding, especially in a wedding gown.

    Has anybody had to deal with this before?

    Any input would be appreciated. Thank you! 

    I have never personally dealt with something like this, but you will have to have accessible restrooms, whether it be port a pottys or one of those trailer roll away bathroom things.  You have to have them.

    Have you asked the venue about what their restroom situation is?

    image
  • I haven't done this myself, but i have been to an outdoor wedding at a house that they had porta-johns.  they were fancy ones in a little trailer looking thing with full sink and stuff inside.  i didn't feel weird using it as a guest, but it was definitely a more casual type wedding. 
  • plainjane0415plainjane0415 The hills of Tennessee
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    Sorry, I just saw where you are LOOKING at venues!  Forget the last part of my comment about asking about their restroom situation!
    image
  • Why are you looking for barn venue?  Are you a ranch hand?  Did you meet your fiance at a dude ranch?  Is your fiance a farmer?  Are you?  I'm just asking because barn weddings are very trendy right now.  (There was a fairly recent article in the Onion [a satirical newspaper] making jokes about this very thing.  http://www.theonion.com/articles/farmer-chases-fifth-wedding-party-out-of-barn-this,36787/ )  I mean, if you're sure it's what you want, go for it.  I just don't think driving out to the boonies, hiking up a dress to your knees in order to avoid dragging the dress through the mud, getting poked in the ass by pieces of straw, and peeing in a port-a-john are really many peoples' idea of a good time.
    southernbelle0915esstee33fwtx5815japrincess24
  • Thanks! I just can't see my guests using a porta john no matter how casual (we were planning on something more laid back). All of the venues near us require rental of bathrooms as there is no running water on site, except for a few that are 10s of thousands out of our price range. (im talking over 10 grand just to rent the barn with nothing included).
  • duscraaduscraa
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    edited November 2014
    Hoping to figure it all out! :-)
  • wrigleyvillewrigleyville Chicago
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    duscraa said:
    Thanks! I just can't see my guests using a porta john no matter how casual (we were planning on something more laid back). All of the venues near us require rental of bathrooms as there is no running water on site, except for a few that are 10s of thousands out of our price range. (im talking over 10 grand just to rent the barn with nothing included).
    Since the barns near you do require renting bathrooms, perhaps you need to change the location while keeping the feel you're looking for.

    My friend had her wedding at a state park. They had a building (with bathrooms and a huge fireplace) that looked like a log cabin. It still had that outdoorsy, rustic feel she wanted without sacrificing comfort.

    Also, some port-a-potties are actually quite nice, all things considered. The other ladies mentioned the ones on trailers that have sinks and stalls. They look like this:

    image

    image

    image

    As you can see, they're much better and have more room than a typical port-a-potty.

    I'm not sure how much they cost, though. I went to a few of those websites, and they all say to call and request a quote. (They probably base it on distance and how many guests you have.)

  • CMGragainCMGragain
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    edited November 2014
    You have obviously never lived in he country.  Do you have any idea what happens when country plumbing (septic tank) is stressed?  It clogs very quickly.  EW!
    IF you are having a country wedding in a barn, you MUST provide adequate toilet facilities.  If you are not willing to do this, then find a venue that has adequate plumbing for a big event, like a country club.

    Why is it that city girls think barn weddings are romantic?  Farm girls have a very different point of view!  Mooooo!
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Those trailer port-a-potties are EXPENSIVE...as in $2k-4k expensive.  When we first started wedding planning, DH *lusted* after the barn wedding scene, and I was wanting something more on the ocean bluffs (both types of venues are literally within feet of one another where we live).  After looking at all of the things we'd have to pay for in order to accommodate our guests decently, it became prohibitively expensive (not to mention, it would have been colder than anyone would have liked), so we ended up doing our ceremony on the bluffs and the doing the reception in a hall with real bathrooms.  It worked out really well.
  • CMGragainCMGragain
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    edited November 2014
    duscraa said:
    Thanks! I just can't see my guests using a porta john no matter how casual (we were planning on something more laid back). All of the venues near us require rental of bathrooms as there is no running water on site, except for a few that are 10s of thousands out of our price range. (im talking over 10 grand just to rent the barn with nothing included).
    This is insane!  The upscale country club my daughter chose near Washington, DC, was only $1000 for the facility, and that included linens, dance floor, china, silver and crystal!  For heaven's sake, find another venue!
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    japrincess24
  • beetherybeethery So sayeth the fuckin' Pope.
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    edited November 2014
    If you really, REALLY REALLY must have a barn, you should look into your local 4H grounds. They might have something set up like that.

    The one out by me was just about $900 for my FSIL to rent it for the entire day. It had tons of parking, and clean, sufficient bathrooms that were not port-a-johns.
    --

    I'm the fuck out.

    image
  • charlieyankee03charlieyankee03 Atlanta
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    edited November 2014

    Because barn weddings are "in" right now, they are VERY expensive. FI have joked about buying a plot of land, throwing a barn on it, and renting it out for weddings. The thing would pay for itself after the first year.

    The only solution is to rent the fancy trailer restrooms or choose a different venue. I have seen them for about $2K and up, but it depends on your area.

    ETA: The bolded.

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  •  
     
    Since the barns near you do require renting bathrooms, perhaps you need to change the location while keeping the feel you're looking for.

    My friend had her wedding at a state park. They had a building (with bathrooms and a huge fireplace) that looked like a log cabin. It still had that outdoorsy, rustic feel she wanted
     
    I would agree with this, looking into some other venues that are that rustic feel but with plumbing.  I started out looking at some  winery's but the site fee alone was in that 5000-7500 range.  I ended up having it at lodge at a start park.  We had the gorgeous views, overlooking a lake, but it was all inclusive with plumbing.   It still gave me the look I liked but at a more upscale location (and a lot less work involved in planning) .  You can be creative and still get the look you are going for. 
  • I was a guest at this type of wedding. The couple rented the nicer trailer type port a johns. I had no problem using them, what so ever. Although, I do know that they were REALLY expensive... And , honestly, I don't think the bride used them at all. I know my wedding dress would not have worked in that type of restroom! Where are you located? Maybe your local board will have some more specific advice?
  • penguin44penguin44 Kansas City
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    I second the suggestion of looking at local parks. We wanted a barn or industrial style venue, and I found a great venue through my local parks department for much cheaper with restrooms and great parking. I found multiple places through local parks departments and lodges that were much cheaper than the trendier places. And I still got the same vibe. I'm attaching a picture to show you what I got for less than $2,000. Tables and chairs included. image

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    Anniversary

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    CMGragainesstee33Gerbertmcwayjaprincess24
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston
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    There's no reason the OP can't have a barn wedding, provided that the guests' needs are met. It may not be everyone's cuppa, but neither is it against etiquette.

    That said, OP, make sure their needs, including working restroom facilities, are met. If you need to rent port-a-johns, please do that. And your guests will appreciate it if you rent the nicer ones, like in the photos above, rather than the normal outdoor ones like you might see at a construction site or outdoor concert.
    wrigleyville
  • One other thing to think about when renting them is the lighting situation.  My friend rented port a potties, slightly bigger than your standard, but definitely not as nice or spacious as the ones pictured above.  And then forgot about lighting because the only lights at the venue were your standard outdoor bulbs right at the entrance of the barn door.  The potties were placed a little ways behind the barn.  It was ok at best (not great) when the sun was still up.  But after the sun went down, we had to have a buddy system to make it across the small, but uneven field to get there and then ended up doing our business in the complete dark.  It was horrible. 

    Personally, I think I'm giving an excuse on the next barn wedding invite I get (I have another acquaintance planning one in the Spring).  I've been to two and that was enough.  I was served cold food at both (the sites were a very lengthy drive from the caterer, there were no kitchen facilities onsite, and by the time I was served - at one of the last tables each time, my food was cold) and both required peeing in less than desirable locations and stumbling around in the dark to find my car at the end of the night. I think there are better ways to achieve country and rustic that don't require peeing in a port a potty.
    japrincess24
  • I rented a restroom trailer.  Each restroom was an individual room with a/c, flat TV, and I put julep cup of flowers on the vanity.  

    This doesn't come cheap though.  If you're doing your budget, budget now for $2,500+.
  • atlastmrsgatlastmrsg
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    edited November 2014
    jacques27 said:
    One other thing to think about when renting them is the lighting situation.  My friend rented port a potties, slightly bigger than your standard, but definitely not as nice or spacious as the ones pictured above.  And then forgot about lighting because the only lights at the venue were your standard outdoor bulbs right at the entrance of the barn door.  The potties were placed a little ways behind the barn.  It was ok at best (not great) when the sun was still up.  But after the sun went down, we had to have a buddy system to make it across the small, but uneven field to get there and then ended up doing our business in the complete dark.  It was horrible. 

    Personally, I think I'm giving an excuse on the next barn wedding invite I get (I have another acquaintance planning one in the Spring).  I've been to two and that was enough.  I was served cold food at both (the sites were a very lengthy drive from the caterer, there were no kitchen facilities onsite, and by the time I was served - at one of the last tables each time, my food was cold) and both required peeing in less than desirable locations and stumbling around in the dark to find my car at the end of the night. I think there are better ways to achieve country and rustic that don't require peeing in a port a potty.

    It doesn't have to be this way.  My caterer had a chef team on site and prep tent to side of venue where they brought in ovens and other equipment and worked.

    Had restroom trailer.

    Had valet parking so no one had to step off sidewalk to get to car.

    Had tent for reception that was well lit, and had landscape lighting company come in to do pathways and uplight trees.

    The catch is that all this was very expensive.  I could've gotten married for much less at a hotel or venue, but it meant a lot to me to get married somewhere that was part of my childhood.

    If you do an outdoor/barn venue, you have to attend to all these details, and pay for them, or you'll end up with the wedding described above.
  • fwtx5815fwtx5815 cowboys nation
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    duscraa said:

    It may sound silly, but I can't see myself using a port-a-john at a wedding, especially in a wedding gown.


    Has anybody had to deal with this before?

    Any input would be appreciated. Thank you! 
    I don't think that sounds silly. And to be honest, if I were attending a wedding with the really basic port-a-john, I might only stay as long as I could hold my bladder. I wouldn't be chatting up other guests if there aren't sinks because I wouldnt be shaking anyone's hand. Just nope.

    I would highly recommend the the nicer trailer restrooms if this is the type of venue you're set on. I've used them at PGA tournament events and thought they were perfectly fine.

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     fka dallasbetch 


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