Friday vs. Saturday

kdunners

Hi all!

I am newly engaged and new to the knot!!  We have just started our wedding planning & have looked at 12 venues already!  I am clearly very picky haha but this past weekend, we came across a venue we LOVED!!  Only issue is that it is $3,000 above budget for a Saturday wedding.  We could definitely make it work on a Friday.  I am just nervous about the Friday wedding at a destination location.  There will be lots of traffic if people are leaving work Friday afternoon which would force people to take the day off.  Although it will be the summer in Newport, so people may want to take the day off or have the day off anyways.  I am going back and forth and not sure if it is worth going over budget for a Saturday. 

Would any of you attend a Friday night wedding in the summer?  Would you be upset about it?  Any advice as a guest of a Friday wedding or a bride who had a Friday wedding?

Thank you!!
K

mlg78

I hate local Friday weddings...to make it a destination Friday wedding makes it even worse.  Usually I skip out of work an hour or two early if it's local...but how far away is it for most of your guests? 

lovegood90

I personally wouldn't attend a Friday out of town wedding unless it was for immediate family. I don't have much vacation time and wouldn't be able to afford to lose a day on travel.

If you have a lot of guests in my position, you could always change your time to later in the evening on Friday, ie ceremony after 6pm and a late night apps/dessert reception at night? That way there's a greater chance more guests could make it depending on how far they live.

It's up to you though, everyone's schedules are different. Just be prepared for the possibility of receiving more declines.

kdunners

@mlg78, Most guests will be traveling over an hour unfortunately.  Or flying.  I went to 10 weddings this past year (all on Saturday) and all I had to travel for, and I took every Friday off.  It didn't bother me since we made it a mini vacation each time.  But, I also know that some people may not be able to take the time. 

@lovegood90, we are inviting 180.  I could definitely move the start time to make it more convenient, that is a good idea!

Thanks for the replies!

Maggie0829

Even if you have your wedding on a Saturday, there will be some guests who can't make it.  So you need to pick a day that works best for you, your VIP guests and your wallet.  And if that means you are going to have a wedding on a Friday then so be it.

I would suggest having a later wedding if you decide on a Friday.  Like start the ceremony at 7pm. That way it will give people time to get home from work, change and get to the venue.  Or if people are driving in that day then they may not have to leave work quite as early if you were having a 4pm wedding, KWIM?

I have only been to maybe 2 or 3 local Friday weddings.  They didn't bother me because I can easily leave work early if I have to.  Now for my H they were difficult because he never knows when he will be done with work (HVAC installer) so he either had to hope he would be off in time to make the ceremony or ask for a half day which he may or may not get.

mikenberger

Personally, I love Friday weddings. I'm having one myself. But I understand not everybody has the flexibility of job that I do. For me, going $3,000 over my venue budget would NOT be okay. Just think of what you could do with the 3k for your guests or yourself? 

Perhaps another venue within budget for a Saturday would be a better option?

peachy13

Totally okay to do a Friday night wedding, but I would just expect that some of your guests might have issues with getting to your wedding on time, and some might even have to miss your ceremony. Yes, some people will probably take the day off, but a lot of people might not be able to. I was once invited to a Friday night wedding and had just started a new job, so couldn't exactly ask for the day off, or even to leave early (it was my third week I think). So I had to haul ass after work and get ready and it was a little stressful. And since I had worked, I was pretty tired during the reception and didn't really want to get my party on... just my two cents as a guest. 

vmj23

I had a Friday evening wedding and there were people that couldn't make it to the ceremony because of work (but still came to the reception) . I totally understood this would happen and was okay with it -  i made sure those closest to me wouldn't have issues/conflicts.   It was a holiday weekend, which did help since many people had half days that day.  (Memorial Day weekend so Monday was the actual holiday).   

PrettyGirlLost

As an OOT guest, I would not attend a Friday wedding unless you were a close relative or my BFF.  I just wouldn't use two vacation days to attend a wedding.

As an in town guest, it might be tricky or too much of a hassle to attend a Friday night wedding depending on what time it began, how far I had to drive, where I would have to drive in relation to rush hour traffic (with or against the flow), how early I would need to leave work to make it, and how formal it was.

levioosa

I am not a fan of Friday weddings.  Is there something you could do to keep you budget in check but still have the Saturday wedding (downgrade the flowers, smaller guest list, wine and beer only instead of full bar, etc.)?

MandyMost

levioosa said:

I am not a fan of Friday weddings.  Is there something you could do to keep you budget in check but still have the Saturday wedding (downgrade the flowers, smaller guest list, wine and beer only instead of full bar, etc.)?

This is what I was going to reccomend. I don't know what you're full budget is, but for a lot of weddings $3000 is just a relatively small proportion of the full budget. I'd much rather give up flowers entirely, or do only wine and beer, to have a Friday wedding.

As you noted, you take Fridays off for Saturday weddings, and even acknowledge that others can't do that (so would just fly in earlier on Saturday). For a Friday wedding you're asking people to use at least one, if not two, vacation days. That's a lot to ask. And do you really want all your guests hustling to get there after work and/or from the airport? Personally, I think this would put a much bigger damper on the party than, say, a DJ instead of a band, no favors, a cheaper cake, a cheaper dress, a much smaller bridal party, a casual and small rehearsal dinner, etc. 

And speaking of the rehearsal dinner, you'd then be having this on a Thursday? So all your VIPs and bridal party would HAVE to take more than a day off from work? Consider that as well. 

Viczaesar

My nephew is having an out of town (plane ride away) Friday wedding, and I most likely will not be able to make it because of a combination of logistics and financial reasons.  It would be much easier to make a Saturday wedding, but there's still a good chance that I would not be able to go.  It makes me really sad that I'm going to have to miss his wedding, as is most of his side of the family.

apromise22

What about a Sunday afternoon wedding? Personally, I hate going out on Fridays--even if it's something much less low key than a wedding. I'm always exhausted by the end of the week and just want to go to bed early. 

wrigleyville

The only way I'd take the day off for a Friday wedding is if it's a sibling or one of my very best friends. I usually decline to attend. I've been to two (out of eleven we've been invited to).

If I'm local, I'd prefer it start at 7:00 so I'd have time to get home, change, and head to the ceremony venue.

That said, there is nothing wrong with having a Friday wedding. You simply have to be prepared for a lot of declines. Personally, I'd rather spend the $3000 to have it on Saturday and see all/most of my friends and family, but I do understand that $3000 is a lot of money.

hellopig

I have been to Friday weddings locally and would do so again. The only way I would go to a Friday wedding that is an hour or more away is if it was my best friend or my brother. 

charcoalandblush

I wouldn't attend a Friday afternoon wedding unless it was immediate family or extremely close friends (I can think of maybe 4 friends I would do this for). Particularly one out of town. I would definitely attend if it was later (7pm-ish) and I didn't have to leave work early.

This is extremely person-specific though. Some people have a lot more flexibility. Before booking, I would suggest confirming that the people that you NEED to be there to make the day feel complete can make it. Parents, grandparents, bridal party, etc.

badbnagdway

It's definitely acceptable to have a Friday wedding. If it was the wedding for a very close friend or a family member I would attend and take that Friday off if I had to travel. I certainly prefer Friday weddings to Sunday weddings. 

That said, people headed to Newport on a Friday afternoon/evening will be facing really bad traffic. Where are they mostly coming from? You said an hour, so I am assuming Providence, because if they are coming from Boston the drive will be much longer than an hour. I am from RI/MA and I think that traffic is going to be an issue because people may not realize how early they need to leave. Certainly do start the ceremony significantly later on a Friday than a Saturday. Also maybe just look at more venues to see if you can find one you can better afford on a more convenient day. 

boxjelly

A friend had a Friday summer wedding.  She was the manager of the restaurant I worked at so, it wasn't a big deal.  And a good majority of our regulars were at her wedding, so it wasn't busy. 

However I probably wouldn't go to a Friday wedding unless it was someone close, or fit better in my schedule. 

Have you thought about doing a Sunday wedding or is that out of the picture.

AddieCake

Depends on how close I am to you if I go to a Friday night wedding. For me, your wedding would be no problem b/c I am a teacher, so if it's in the summer, I'm already off. One of my cousins got married on a Friday night locally, and it was a pain in the ass to get there. Had she not been my cousin, I probably wouldn't have gone. Check with your VIPs first to see if it even works for them before you consider the masses. 

[Deleted User]

I'm getting married on a Friday.  It just worked better for us overall; we are having a relatively small wedding.  We are inviting only 100 people.   Every single venue we looked at within our price range wanted us to have minimum guest count of 130-150 for a Saturday night.   

We just could not commit or afford to invite 150 people.    Our venue only required a minimum of 75 on a Friday; so in the event we have a few decline, we don't have to worry about paying extra money to make the quota.   I know not everyone will make the ceremony because it starts at 5pm, but I know they'll be able to make the reception that starts at 7pm ( a Catholic Mass + travel time, so there is no gap there).   We also had issues with gap on Saturday due to an early ceremony time.  Friday start time = no gap.  

When it comes to the "Can I make  a Friday wedding because of work debate?," I always think about the guests that work on Saturdays that also struggle with this same issue.   We have quite a few family members/friends that work in sales, retail,  law enforcement, nursing, etc that do not have Monday-Friday jobs.     You're always going to have people that can't make it to a wedding on a Saturday for these same reasons.     Ultimately, you have to pick the date/time and venue that works within your budget.    If you pick a Friday, make sure to send Save the Dates in advance so people are aware of the event.  

climbingsingle

It really depends on how far I'd have to travel and how close we are. If you're one of my best friends and I had to drive up to Newport, I'd probably take Friday off of work and drive up the night before. If we're not that close, and I had to travel far, I might skip i t. 

cantwaitforthefuture

We had a Friday wedding, mostly because we had a shorter engagement, and Saturday wedding venues were hard to come by for the summer (I'm a teacher, so a summer wedding was a must if we wanted to go on a honeymoon afterward).  But, we invited 172 people and 154 people attended and we did NOT send out save the dates either.  We did have a later wedding (reception did not start until 7pm).  Based on our numbers, it seemed like a Friday wedding did not deter people from coming.

jacobsmawedding15

I'm doing a Friday wedding because I'm Catholic, and my church only does morning or early afternoon weddings, so there would either have to be a really long gap between ceremony and reception (NO) or a meal at an awkward time of day-and no one would want to drink or dance because it would be really early. So we went with Friday, and I know some people may not be able to make the ceremony and my VIP's will have to take the day off. Just make sure you are considerate for other activities like the rehearsal. I'm going to have to make my rehearsal in the late evening on Thursday, because it's not fair to ask my girls to take off early from work AND miss all day Friday of work.

AuroraRose41

We are having a Friday wedding. Initially I wanted a Saturday wedding, but Friday allowed us to save some money on the catering cost and we realized that we could have a 1.5 year engagement instead of a 2.5 year engagement because of the cost savings. This was really important to us given that we have some relatives who have had some health issues recently (but really want to see us get married), and while it's no guarantee that they will live to that day, we figured doing it sooner rather than later would be better. 

We also have a lot of people local to the area that we are getting married in, and we are starting our ceremony at 6 pm. Many of FI's friends work weekends, so a Saturday wouldn't have been much more convenient. The few people that we do have who are OOT have never been to Upstate NY, and mentioned wanting to spend a week or so there anyways, so it wasn't a big deal to them at all when we mentioned that we were considering a Friday. 

I also don't expect any of my bridesmaids to take an entire day off on Friday. As long as they are ready to go at 6 pm, that's all that matters to me. I am also not dictating anything but a color/length/fabric/designer for the dress, so the rest is all up to them, and that should make it easier for them too since they won't have to get hair and makeup appointments if they don't want to.