So Frustrated Right Now

randomnumber041616

I just need to seriously vent this out.  

We're not getting married until April of 2016.  

We got engaged in October.  

I immediately started looking at a bunch of venues online and making appointments to see about 5 or 6 places after narrowing it down. This one venue really stood out and I had a little trouble getting in touch with the people but I really wanted to see it.  I finally found a phone number for the actual person in charge and got an appointment.  It was perfect.  The right price, had a good indoor option for inclement weather, good space, and was gorgeous.  Not wanting to jump on the very first thing, we looked a couple more places in our budget before deciding that was the one.  

Just before the Christmas holidays, I emailed the woman in charge, asking to make an appointment to go over a contract and put down a deposit.  No reply.  I figured it was close to the holidays and everyone had a lot on their plates, so after the new year, I called.  Scheduled an appointment to meet last Friday at noon.  I figured I would just take a few extra minutes at lunch to go over there since I get an hour and it's about 25 minutes from my work.  No problem.  

I get there at noon. Doors are locked and no one answering.  Call the woman on the phone number that she had told me to call if I had any problems. No answer.  Wait about 10 minutes and try to call again. No answer.  Call FI who wasn't too far away and he comes over while I call again.  Left a voicemail.  

Now it's getting to be about 12:30.  We see someone exit the building (there are offices on the second floor of the building, but the woman that handles the rental of it for weddings and events does not actually work in this building).  FI stops her and asks her if she's seen this woman.  She hasn't but she takes down our name and number and says she'll email her when she gets back and let her know we were waiting for her. 

FI tries the front door again.  It's still locked but a maintenance person lets us in when he hears us trying the door. Maintenance person tells us "Good luck with that" when we tell him who we are supposed to be meeting.  Finally, another woman shows up and tells us that she "forgot the wedding coordinator told her that she was busy and would need her to meet with us".

Okay, fine, not the wedding coordinator's fault.  Except that apparently this woman did not know that we were supposed to be going over a contract and putting down a deposit and did not have the means or the authority to do this and kept insisting on "showing us around" even though we'd already seen the place and been over it all already.  

mikenberger

I probably wouldn't rent this place. You're practically begging them to take your money and they still suck at communication and general follow through. I can't imagine what they'll be like when you're actually needing them. I'd find something else. And yes, that totally sucks that you found your favorite space and this is the turnout. Blech.

randomnumber041616

Yeah. I feel like I'm back at square one now.  FI keeps on saying it's not that big a deal, but I've pretty much given up on this place.  Today, I told him, "Even if we did still want to rent the place, it's not possible to do so since they won't actually LET me give them money."

mikenberger

randomnumber041616 said:

Yeah. I feel like I'm back at square one now.  FI keeps on saying it's not that big a deal, but I've pretty much given up on this place.  Today, I told him, "Even if we did still want to rent the place, it's not possible to do so since they won't actually LET me give them money."

That's okay You've got time. Easy for me to say, I know. But it'll be alright. And by the time your wedding comes around, this'll all be a distant memory.

peachy13

You're doing the right thing by forgetting this venue and moving on. There is plenty of time still, and you'll be happy to find a place with a responsive coordinator. You'll have a lot of questions for your coordinator come crunch time before your wedding, and trust me, you'll want immediate answers.

randomnumber041616

I'm thinking about just letting go of the whole inside/outside thing.  I was planning on an outside wedding and indoor reception and making sure the place had a good indoor option for the ceremony in case of inclement weather, but now I'm starting to lean towards just making sure it has indoor space for both.  A bunch of the places I'm looking at now have separate rooms and charge by the room and for use of the outdoor space.  April is such an iffy month, though, I might just find somewhere that I can rent two rooms, one for the ceremony and one for the reception, and get nice outside pictures. 

Inkdancer

randomnumber041616 said:

I'm thinking about just letting go of the whole inside/outside thing.  I was planning on an outside wedding and indoor reception and making sure the place had a good indoor option for the ceremony in case of inclement weather, but now I'm starting to lean towards just making sure it has indoor space for both.  A bunch of the places I'm looking at now have separate rooms and charge by the room and for use of the outdoor space.  April is such an iffy month, though, I might just find somewhere that I can rent two rooms, one for the ceremony and one for the reception, and get nice outside pictures. 

This is probably the best idea.

We ducked outside during cocktail hour when the rain stopped and took pictures in the cemetery across the street from our chapel. You can't tell it's a cemetery in any of the pictures... all you can see are trees and fence, and the pics look great. Our guests got to stay inside in the AC and we got our pretty pictures.

LadyMillil

randomnumber041616 said:

I'm thinking about just letting go of the whole inside/outside thing.  I was planning on an outside wedding and indoor reception and making sure the place had a good indoor option for the ceremony in case of inclement weather, but now I'm starting to lean towards just making sure it has indoor space for both.  A bunch of the places I'm looking at now have separate rooms and charge by the room and for use of the outdoor space.  April is such an iffy month, though, I might just find somewhere that I can rent two rooms, one for the ceremony and one for the reception, and get nice outside pictures. 

I got married in April. The plan was to have an outdoor ceremony on the venue patio and an indoor reception in the ballroom. It was barely above freezing on my wedding day so we moved everything inside. We just rented the ballroom. The venue staff set it up for the ceremony, we left the room for about 20 minutes while the venue staff did a quick change to dinner seating and came back in. There was a room divider so all the table were set up on the other side of the divider to make the room switch quick. We did a receiving line during this time. There was a smallish conference room we were able to use for free for this purpose. I would definitely recommend asking if potential venues can do something similar so you don't have to pay 2 rental fees.

randomnumber041616

LadyMillil said:

randomnumber041616 said:

I'm thinking about just letting go of the whole inside/outside thing.  I was planning on an outside wedding and indoor reception and making sure the place had a good indoor option for the ceremony in case of inclement weather, but now I'm starting to lean towards just making sure it has indoor space for both.  A bunch of the places I'm looking at now have separate rooms and charge by the room and for use of the outdoor space.  April is such an iffy month, though, I might just find somewhere that I can rent two rooms, one for the ceremony and one for the reception, and get nice outside pictures. 

I got married in April. The plan was to have an outdoor ceremony on the venue patio and an indoor reception in the ballroom. It was barely above freezing on my wedding day so we moved everything inside. We just rented the ballroom. The venue staff set it up for the ceremony, we left the room for about 20 minutes while the venue staff did a quick change to dinner seating and came back in. There was a room divider so all the table were set up on the other side of the divider to make the room switch quick. We did a receiving line during this time. There was a smallish conference room we were able to use for free for this purpose. I would definitely recommend asking if potential venues can do something similar so you don't have to pay 2 rental fees.

I'll check into that. Thanks for the advice.

badbnagdway

I am a go with my gut person with vendors. If someone jerks me around or gives me the sense that they are not organized at the outset, I find someone else. One time flakiness may not be indicative of how they do business but that's all you have to go on. I would probably be less harsh on a venue than other types of vendors though, depending on what you are getting from the venue. For example, our reception venue is just a space with a catering kitchen, tables and chairs. We bring in everything else. All we really need is for the people who run it to have it open at the right time and not be dicks. (They are actually very nice and responsive at our venue). At the opposite end of the spectrum, if the venue is providing things like catering, I would need them to be on top of their $hit. 

climbingsingle

What a mess. Definitely find another venue. 

MandyMost

We went to see a lot of venues. Only one was a "problem". It was over the summer that we were looking, I had set up an appointment over email a couple weeks in advance, and they totally stood me up. They didn't have my phone number to call me. A maintenance guy let us in for like a minute, and I fell in love with the place.

The people apologized, set up another appointment, and were there on time and organized. We booked the venue, because I just loved it. We never had any other issues. After the no-show I learned that it's ALWAYS a good idea to follow-up the day before meeting someone to confirm. 

If you really, really, really love this place I would give them another chance. Make another appointment (or have a friend make an appointment) and see if it was just a fluke issue with you, or if they're consistently a mess. 

porkchops926

Ok, so for me the biggest red flag in that story is the maintenance guy saying "good luck with that" IMHO, the blue collar workers at any place will often tell it like it is. It's not on them to try and sell the place to you, and they still have a good idea of what goes down on a day to day basis. To me, that comment says that the place is generally unreliable.

frenchiekin

OP, have you looked for reviews of this place online?  If this is a venue that regularly does social events and weddings, you should be able to find something online somewhere.  If you can find reviews, they may give you a better indication of how things have gone for other couples/customers in the past.  If anything indicates the same fears you're currently having, I would run.