Non-wedding party guests "making a weekend out of it" ?

peachy13

The STDs have gone out and our guests are booking their hotel rooms, which is great, but a handful of people have been letting me know that they want to "make a weekend out of it" and booked for Fri and Sat night (Sat is the wedding). 

Our close family and wedding party -- who are all staying over Friday night -- are all invited to the rehearsal ceremony and dinner which is nearby our venue. I am a little panicky about the 20 or so other guests who have decided to stay over Friday night, because I really cannot invite to the rehearsal dinner (we are at capacity, my FFIL is paying, etc.). I know it's their choice to come up a night early and I know I'm not obligated to host them Friday night, but I don't really feel right about running into them at the hotel or greeting them on Friday and then spending most of the night with everyone else.

I know I'm probably over-thinking this big time and that these other guests just want to get away for two nights instead of one. I guess I just feel guilty about them all proudly telling me that they booked their hotel room for two nights and are all excited for the weekend and then Friday night I'll be like okay bye going to get dinner everyone else. Anyone else run into this problem? Thanks!

Casadena

We had a lot of people come in the night before, mostly family, and it was not a big deal at all.  Like you said, it was their choice to come in early and I'm sure they understand that if they're not part of the wedding party (plus any other guests you are inviting to the rehearsal/dinner) then they'll be on their own for the evening.  Honestly, that's probably what they want anyway!!!

southernbelle0915

Have you ever made a weekend out of a wedding? Probably. Did you expect that because you made the choice to go a day early that the B&G would host you for dinner on Friday night? Probably not. 

These guests are not going to expect to be hosted. (If they do, that rude on their part.) Let this go and put your energy toward making yourself a margarita.

peachy13

southernbelle0915 said:

Have you ever made a weekend out of a wedding? Probably. Did you expect that because you made the choice to go a day early that the B&G would host you for dinner on Friday night? Probably not. 

These guests are not going to expect to be hosted. (If they do, that rude on their part.) Let this go and put your energy toward making yourself a margarita.

more than anything do I need this. Thank you!

jacques27

Overthinking.  I frequently will make a weekend out of events like this and will frequently say "I'm so excited".  Not because "OMG I'M TOTALLY GOING TO WEDDING IT UP ALL WEEKEND!" but because "Damn, I get take a break and have someone make my bed for me and order eggs benedict from room service instead of eating my usual yogurt, hitting the treadmill, and doing laundry!"

The last wedding I did this and told my friend how excited I was that I'm staying two nights.  Her response was "Cool - what are you doing the first night?" not "Oh, does this mean you need the rehearsal dinner info?"  I spent the night eating at an awesome restaurant at a winery, by the way.

climbingsingle

You're definitely overthinking this. We got married at a resort and a lot of our guests stayed all weekend. We ran into a few people on the way to our rehearsal dinner. It wasn't awkward or weird and they didn't expect anything. Everyone was perfectly fine doing their own thing.

KikiMira

I would leave it alone, you didn't offer any wedding related events that night, so no need to panic. If people ask say you are busy doing wedding stuff because you really are.  

Kahlyla

I can tell you that I LOVE to "make weekends" out of events like this, and that it has NOTHING to do with seeing more of the couple. I love my friends, don't get me wrong, but if I want to take extra time on a getaway it's to be with myself and/or my husband. Granted, I'm an introvert, but still. I'd probably have a particular restaurant in mind already, places I want to check out, have an idea about what munchies to bring back to the hotel room, or be planning to hit up the hotel pool and hot tub (which, by the way, we've never ever had a chance to do when traveling for someone else's event UNLESS we make a weekend out of it).

Don't stress about a thing!

levioosa

I've made "a weekend" out of an OOT wedding before, and I never expected to be hosted the night before the wedding.  It was my choice to fly in a day or two early to have a mini-vacation, and I would never put that on the B&G.  

Don't stress yourself out.  Margaritas all around!  

WhatawagSBNy

They think you chose a nice place to play tourist in, or maybe were ready for a getaway weekend and your wedding is the reason they are here for that getaway time. That's great. Don't worry about it. It would be silly to change plans to invite them, and not nice to add them to a party someone else is hosting. Assume they know that.