Gay Weddings

same sex wedding in a state where same sex marriage is not legal

Hi! My fiancee and I are getting married in Michigan in October, despite it not actually being lawful. We currently live in Boston so are planning on doing the legal part (marriage license) here then just having the ceremony and reception in Michigan (where most of my family is). I don't have a problem with it, but my parents and other relatives seem confused. I'm in the vendor-researching phase and am worried that my business won't be accepted due to not being a hetero couple. I've checked out twobrides.com which was helpful. I hate that I have to ask "oh and just so you know it's a same sex wedding, are you ok with that?" (I also hate that my mother reminds me about needing to ask people that every time we talk about the wedding). Anyway. For those of you who've had weddings in states where it's not yet legal, what kind of issues did you run into? Any advice? (We're getting married at the Henry Ford Museum and they've been totally fine about everything so far).

Re: same sex wedding in a state where same sex marriage is not legal

  • It wasn't married in my state when we got married, but I did tell people.  I expected people would have no problem with it, and if there was any sign they did, I moved on.  But really, only one person gave me a side eye.   I just said "this will be a same sex wedding".  But most people figured it out when I said "partner" instead of "fiance" or "boyfriend".  
  • photokittyphotokitty where I want to be
    Moderator Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    mod
    edited March 2015
    My sister and her wife didn't have any issues in Ohio - sad that anyone does have issues with narrow minded vendors. You could say "my future wife and I would like to see your pricing." Or "My fiancee, Susan, and I" assuming she has a feminine name that would not easily pass for gender neutral. 
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • adk19adk19
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    member
    I know two women who had a wedding ceremony and reception in Michigan.  I'm pretty sure they have 3 anniversaries.  They have the date they got Civilly Unionized in Illinois.  They have their big-todo ceremony and party in Michigan.  They were planning on heading over to Iowa to get legally married, but Illinois was just a few months behind, so they went to the courthouse to get legally married.  I thought that would be their anniversary as well, but I think they retro-dated their civil union to a marriage.
  • My sister and her wife did the legal ceremony in Iowa (it's not legal in MO), and luckily I don't think they ran into any issues with vendors.  Actually their venue proudly posted it on their FB page that this was their first of hopefully many same-sex weddings. 
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    adk19
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