Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

XP: Bridal Shower Help

Hi,

I am a groom posting on the site, hope this is okay :)

My Fiancee and I are getting married in May and I just had to share this story about her bridal shower and would love to hear some other people's thoughts.

Originally, the bridal shower was going to be at the beginning of March but in the early planning stages the MOH and Fiancee's mom realized that date would not work.  At this point only the bridal party and both moms knew of the event so changing the date wasn't a big deal.  It was moved to April 11th.  Only problem is...MOH did not tell my mom the new date!  We found this out because we went out to dinner with my parents tonight and Fiancee mentioned the shower (she found out about it because one of the bridesmaids let it slip by mistake) and my mom did a double take.  Turns out, she is going to be out of town at a conference that day for her work!  Fiancee is pretty steamed (her and my mom are very close so obviously she wants her to be there) and I'm not exactly thrilled either.

We talked to the MOH tonight and after the profuse apologies she decided to talk to the other bridal party and fiancee's mom about possibly rescheduling it to another weekend to accomodate my mom. Thankfully it's being hosted at Fiancee's mom's house so no rental deposits or anything, but Fiancee's mom is pretty resistent to moving the date again.  MOH said invitations only went out a couple days ago so there havent been any RSVP's yet.

Also, I found out that MOH decided that to "keep it small" she didn't invite any of my 3 Aunts who live in the relative area, and only was planning to invite my mom and one cousin who has never even met the Fiancee.  I'm personally a little bothered by this because my Aunts had mentioned the event in the past and were looking forward to coming.

So what do you guys think?  Is it fair to move the shower date to a day that my mom can attend?  Or is it just one of those "too bad, so sad" kind of things that we'll just have to deal with?

Re: XP: Bridal Shower Help

  • I'm not sure what to say about the date, especially if invitations have already gone out. Yes, the MOH should have cleared the date with your mom before switching but that ship has sailed.

    That being said, nobody should ever expect an invitation to a shower. That includes your aunts. The MOH was under no obligation to invite them. If they feel slighted they could always offer to host their own shower for your FI that is just for your side of the family so that would include your mom.
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  • OP if you post the same question on multiple boards, it standard practice to have "XP" for cross post as the subject- ie your post should be titled "XP: Bridal Shower Help"

    I answered your post on etiquette. 
  • PPs have it covered in your other etiquette thread.  I just wanted to add that also in the future, don't delete your post or change the title to "closed thread."  It's poor internet etiquette and it sends out bat signal for people to come and comment on it.  It also prevents lurkers, who might have your same question, from being able to see the conversation and gain good information from it for themselves.  You can't delete a thread here, so it's better to leave it up whole.


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  • levioosa said:

    PPs have it covered in your other etiquette thread.  I just wanted to add that also in the future, don't delete your post or change the title to "closed thread."  It's poor internet etiquette and it sends out bat signal for people to come and comment on it.  It also prevents lurkers, who might have your same question, from being able to see the conversation and gain good information from it for themselves.  You can't delete a thread here, so it's better to leave it up whole.

    Thanks for letting me know, I'll change the title back.
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