clinical depression and your wedding day

TeskeBride24

Hi there.I want to hear from brides who suffer from major or clinical depression, are married and how their wedding day was? I'm looking for feedback from those who were suffering from depression prior, during and after their wedding day, please!

missfrodo

Hello!  Not married yet, but I thought it was interesting to see someone ask about this.  I have clinical depression.  I get so frustrated when I'm depressed, but FI is really good about supporting me.  However, his parents are concerned about us getting married, they think I'm going to go off the deep end someday and he'll be alone or sucked into the madness with me...If I do become more depressed before or after the wedding, I know my FI will be there to support me and help me get through it!  He knows what he's gotten himself into, he's seen me at my worst and he's still here!  

Sorry this didn't answer your question, just wanted to add my 2 cents!  

mhogberg

my depression /anxiety has gotten a ton better since we have gotten together.  But as stated you have to have a partner in life that will support you even if he can't fully understand what you are fighting

TeskeBride24

I appreciate everyone's comments and look forward to hearing more

vikingmom806

Really interesting question! Thanks for asking - reminds me I'm not the only one!

I have major depressive disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder. I haven't gotten married yet, but sometimes the stress of planning does take a toll on me. The upside, though? I have a wonderful life partner in my fiance. He is always supportive and works alongside me so we get through life's hurdles together. He doesn't do the work it takes to manage depression for me, but he doesn't leave me in the dust, either.

I'm not worried about my depression on my wedding day, and one of the main reasons is because of the incredible committment that I'm making to a wonderful man who has already been by my side through so much. I have faith that you can say the same thing about your fiance, and send you lots of blessings and hugs.

-Ellie

ykandi22z

Amazing question! I suffer from a MAJOR disorder and it has impacted my life, marriage, divorce, and upcoming wedding in unimaginable ways.

I have found pray, knowing when to let go, and staying under a doctor's care is the only way to handle marriage. So I will be taking plenty of  my doctor prescribed "Happy Pills" on my big day so that I don't freak out and ruin it.

TallyKyle

Hey there!
Just got married a few weeks ago, and my depression/anxiety did kick in during the wedding. My day started at 6:30 and was go-go-go all day. My emotions didn't really have a chance to catch up with me. I was more excited and antsy then anything else. It wasn't until the reception, and my Uncle brought up my recently deceased Grandfather that I started to feel it. I held back tears and treid to move on. Instantly my appetite disappeared. I started to feel a little nausous, so I went to the bathroom. I continued to feel worse and worse until I felt like I couldn't breathe. A few of my friends came in and gave me the advice to take off my waist-cincher. I instantly felt a little better. My new husband came into the bathroom and he let me get everything out that I needed to. I cried a little (ok a lot) and went back out to dinner. I didn't eat anything else, but my H stayed by my side the entire night and I had a blast.
Now, after everything is done, I'm feeling more of a letdown then anything else. I miss my family, my friends, and I wish I could remember more of the wedding- everything went by so fast. I know it will get better as I get back into my routine, but I do miss the wedding!

erollis

I had drama coming from our Best Man and one of the bridesmaids (best mans girlfriend). That plus the normal stress of planning a wedding did not help my depression at all. I broke down after the rehearsal dinner because I couldn't take it anymore. Thankfully I had a fantastic support system that helped me cope and make the rest of the night enjoyable. The next day I was pulled in a million directions and started to get bad again. My Moh helped me out by getting rid of the problem. Once it quieted down around me and when it was just me and my dad, waiting alone to walk down the aisle, I felt much better. Then the rest of the day was so enjoyable I had no more problems. The overwhelming joy and charge of the day helped me to feel good. I miss our wedding day because that was the best I have felt in a while.

TeskeBride24

;

rswan412

I may not have Major Depressive Disorder, but I can say that I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder about 10 years ago, and have been fighting with it ever since. I have gone through two rounds of therapy for it, just finishing my last one about two weeks ago. I have to say that I have had to use tons of coping skills during this process, but I have survived! I am nervous about the big day- when I get anxious I throw up, have panic attacks and break out in hives (really random), but I have been in control for so long that I am hoping it's not too bad. I'll let you know how it goes after the big day

neolagu

Hi I was married in Oct. We like being married, it brings a sense of satisfaction and joy. It was hard to get married, I used a lot of sleeping pills, headache pills, and  a lot of tears,  with waves of fear  coming over me, oh it was awful. My hands shook so badly when I was doing the invitations, I called a friend, who came over the next day to get the invitations out. 
Since then, I have entered a phase of getting to know me. I had horrible headaches, feeling afraid often and not understanding what was happening, so I have weekly talks with my trainer friend, who is a MFT. The headaches have stopped, hurrah, feeling scared  is not so bad. I have a lot more empathy for brides. It was a big deal, but things have calmed down. I should mention that we are an older couple who had never married, we were both confirmed  bachelor and bachelorette. And thankfully we are enjoying the good life.
Mimsie

samiamagirl

Not married yet but can definitely relate- I was wrongly diagnosed years ago with clinical depression.  Then, last year, after my father's death, I was diagnosed with bipolar and was put on proper medication as well as therapy.  Between therapy, medication, and the wonderful man that is soon to be my husband I've been doing pretty great, but like all of you have had my stressed and depressed episodes.

One thing I've discussed with my fiance is that he's going to do some therapy with me so he also has coping mechanisms in place should I have a major depressive/anxiety episode and he doesn't feel completely lost.

bellabananas

As a clinician, I would like to remind everyone that just because you have a diagnosis doesn't mean that is who you are. You are a bride on your wedding day! If you have a meltdown, you are simply joining the club of millions of brides! You don't have to be diagnosed with GAD or MDD in order to have spikes of anxiety or crying. I sincerely doubt that I won't cry at my wedding. Not to discount anyone's experiences (seriously, I have NO idea what your experiences are and I fully recognize that), but if you read the posts without thinking "mental illness" it sounds like stress. Give yourselves a break and recognize stress, not symptoms!  And many many many people feel letdown after the wedding, so much planning and then nothing!
I hope everyone is able to enjoy their day, and recognize that sometimes, crying is just crying, not depression. Stress hits everyone and very few of us are immune to it! Air hugs to everyone!

oldbride56

I was diagnosed with clinical depression and post-traumatic stress disorder years ago -- thankfully, my primary care doctor is really good about "hearing me" and monitoring my meds.

I've had some really stressed out days (lots of changes in my life in the past year), but overall, I'm really excited and have done pretty well with handling the stress.  My fiance is an absolute sweetheart and always listens when I'm having a "moment".  I think that makes a huge difference in how I'm handling things when a wrench gets thrown into the works!

I'm really looking forward to my big day -- not anticipating any melt-downs at all, but I'm sure I'll have at least a few happy tears - just like any other bride!