My cousin got engaged 6 months after me, but is getting married before me.

spockforprez

And I'm totally excited! We may even double up on prewedding events, possibly a joint family shower. We are very close in age and friendship and it's incredibly exciting to be going through this with her. She is my bridesmaid and I am hers, and we can carry on long text message conversations about wedding stuff without feeling self-conscious.

Plus, my fiancé and I chose to have a very long (18 month) engagement for personal and financial reasons, and she chose her date for personal and academic reasons. There's no "thunder" to be stolen because we both made decisions that work for us.

With my long engagement, there are long periods of drought where I (sometimes even intentionally) don't have anything going on with planning or vendors. Planning her wedding in 9 months (although that's not THAT short!) means things are moving quickly and it's a LOT more fun for me than my own wedding!

Okay, I gotcha with the clickbait title. I've just seen this topic numerous times and it's usually for the opposite reason, so I figured AW or not, I would share my positive feelings about the situation.  

twoleighs

Yup, you got me hook line and sinker.  

That's awesome that you have a great relationship and are planning together!

Thanks for sharing!

randomslove

That's awesome! My sister and I are both engaged. She got engaged a few months before me and she's getting married in September (we think... she's had to change her date for medical reasons several times, but this may be it!), and my FI and I are getting married next December.

Far from being upset when I got engaged, my sister was thrilled. She'd told me a few weeks before that she created Sims of my FI and I and made us have babies. She's happy we're engaged together, because we can discuss wedding stuff together and see ideas we would never use, but love, get some use. She's having a tropical "summer" wedding (it's in Florida, so it's almost always summer), and I'm having a cozy winter wedding.

Isn't it nice to have a close family with whom you can joyfully share these things?

thisismynickname2

That's great! Being engaged along with other people is fun, to share ideas and excitement

simcal18

Isn't that awesome?  It's almost like there's enough happiness in the world for more than one person or something.

princessleia22

Yay! My sister got married 2 months after me (she got engaged 12 months after we did) and it was great.  It was nice having someone who actually kind of cares about wedding talk (because most people don't give a rats ass about wedding details).  It was great to bounce ideas off of.  Luckily we have different styles, so we didn't have to worry much about stealing ideas or our weddings looking like copies.  And we were even able to reuse some items for both weddings to save costs. 

arrrghmatey

One of my bridesmaids got engaged a month after me and is getting married next weekend. We've been having a lot of fun helping each other out, exchanging useful info, and talking about wedding planning. Once she's married next weekend, I'm on my own! Well, there's FI….hahahaha.

JaniV123

We got engaged Dec 14, 2013, my cousin got engaged May 25, 2014. They got married May 2 and our wedding is in 4 days. We were always super excited and talked weddings. Our showers were 1 week apart! 

Only down side is we had about 5 declines from family who had to travel since they came to my cousins wedding.

But we are happy anyways!!! 

madamerwin

You got me! I was expecting some Speshul Snowflake shitshow, but it's refreshing that your post was not what I thought it would be.

I'm with ya on the excitement - my sister got engaged a month before me, and she's getting married two months after me. It has been fun to talk about our plans and bounce ideas off of each other. No thunder stolen here either! 

I had a 15 month engagement, so there were definitely periods of time where there was nothing wedding-related to do. Now we're in to the final countdown (10 days!), and the stress is only now starting to hit me. The great thing about a long engagement is that you have so much time to prepare (or procrastinate, of that's your thing).

[Deleted User]

Am I a bad person for reading the title of this post and then being disappointed because OP is actually happy about this situation? Thought it was someone else in my exact situation. My cousin got engaged 6 months after me and is getting married before me too. They picked the date exactly one month before mine. So I changed mine- not because I'm a brat but because this cousin's mother is a brat and I just didn't want to hear it. So now my family flying in from out of state will have to choose- spend the money to come to both weddings within a month and a half of each other, or choose which cousin they'd rather celebrate with. It's just frustrating... I don't even want to spend the money on an invitation for people that have already said, "yeah... I'm going to Will's wedding instead. Hope yours is good!" I just want to scream thinking about it again...

Jen4948

You got me. That's totally cool!

ShesSoCold

jgrace8611 said:

Am I a bad person for reading the title of this post and then being disappointed because OP is actually happy about this situation? Thought it was someone else in my exact situation. My cousin got engaged 6 months after me and is getting married before me too. They picked the date exactly one month before mine. So I changed mine- not because I'm a brat but because this cousin's mother is a brat and I just didn't want to hear it. So now my family flying in from out of state will have to choose- spend the money to come to both weddings within a month and a half of each other, or choose which cousin they'd rather celebrate with. It's just frustrating... I don't even want to spend the money on an invitation for people that have already said, "yeah... I'm going to Will's wedding instead. Hope yours is good!" I just want to scream thinking about it again...

To the bolded - did you move your wedding to be before your cousin's? Regardless, moving your date because someone else picked a date somewhat close to your date just sounds ridiculous to me. 

spockforprez

jgrace8611 said:

Am I a bad person for reading the title of this post and then being disappointed because OP is actually happy about this situation? Thought it was someone else in my exact situation. My cousin got engaged 6 months after me and is getting married before me too. They picked the date exactly one month before mine. So I changed mine- not because I'm a brat but because this cousin's mother is a brat and I just didn't want to hear it. So now my family flying in from out of state will have to choose- spend the money to come to both weddings within a month and a half of each other, or choose which cousin they'd rather celebrate with. It's just frustrating... I don't even want to spend the money on an invitation for people that have already said, "yeah... I'm going to Will's wedding instead. Hope yours is good!" I just want to scream thinking about it again...

I'm sorry the post upset you! I guess things are more complicated when you have family out of town; our family is all local, so we won't have the issue of duplicating huge expenses. I would hope that your family loves you enough to attend your wedding and not choose between them! Did you move your date later or earlier?

downtondiva

Thank you for restoring my faith in humanity. Happy wedding planning!

randomslove

So my sister broke it off with her FI (really bad situation... pretty much all his fault, and my pregnant sister and her son and dog are now living with my mom). I know she was excited to get married and have her family official before the baby was born.

spockforprez

randomslove said:

So my sister broke it off with her FI (really bad situation... pretty much all his fault, and my pregnant sister and her son and dog are now living with my mom). I know she was excited to get married and have her family official before the baby was born.

Aww, that really sucks. I'm sorry! I'm glad she has a place to go and that you're there to support her. It will be rough for her, especially with you getting married. Hopefully she will be okay!

randomslove

@dreadpirateroberts -- Thank you for your kind words. I worry how she'll feel with me getting married, excited, etc. Whereas before we would talk about wedding plans together, I'll probably just not mention mine unless she asks until it's time to ask her WP questions (what's your budget for a dress? do you have any issues with xyz type of dress? and that's... pretty much it).

The good news is that my wedding is seventeen months away! So there is plenty of time before I need to ask her any questions, if she is feeling up to standing next to me at my wedding.