Snarky Brides

Do people really get this wrapped up in the details?

Hi snarky brides,

  I need help - every time I think I'm making progress something else comes up. This is no big deal at all in the scheme of things but I'm knee deep in wedding details at the moment.... FMIL asked him the other day what they would be doing for her and FFIL's "entrance." I thought they were just seated...MOB last obv. I'm not at all "all about me" in any way but I can't help but feel like this is such a bizarre request. Apparently she wants to walk Fi down the aisle and have FFIL walk behind. This feels slightly awk to me - am I off base? I know Jewish ceremonies often do this with Fi walking with FFIL and FMIL but our wedding is Christian and pretty informal...outdoors by a pond. Gorg reception, but not incredibly traditional whatsoever.

I haven't been to a wedding since I was 6 and clearly have no idea. Fi also has no idea - I care most about what he wants to do but he just wants to go with the flow and do what makes sense. HELP?! Ideas?

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Re: Do people really get this wrapped up in the details?

  • In weddings I've been to the MOG is usually seated like this (by the groom, with his father behind them) but there's no special song just for the MOG. There's either one song for family being seated and one for the bridal party processional, or just one song for the family and the bridal party processional. No special songs just for MOG and MOG.

    Is your mom picky about the prelude song? If not, you can just go with whatever MOG picks and make that the song for the whole family (grandparents, if any, and parents). If there aren't many immediate family members to be seated and the song is longer, you can have that song play almost to the end and have MOG and MOB seated in the last minute or so of the song and then immediately go into the bridal party processional.

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  • Hi snarky brides,

      I need help - every time I think I'm making progress something else comes up. This is no big deal at all in the scheme of things but I'm knee deep in wedding details at the moment.... FMIL asked him the other day what they would be doing for her and FFIL's "entrance." I thought they were just seated...MOB last obv. I'm not at all "all about me" in any way but I can't help but feel like this is such a bizarre request. Apparently she wants to walk Fi down the aisle and have FFIL walk behind. This feels slightly awk to me - am I off base? I know Jewish ceremonies often do this with Fi walking with FFIL and FMIL but our wedding is Christian and pretty informal...outdoors by a pond. Gorg reception, but not incredibly traditional whatsoever.

    I haven't been to a wedding since I was 6 and clearly have no idea. Fi also has no idea - I care most about what he wants to do but he just wants to go with the flow and do what makes sense. HELP?! Ideas?

    I don't think anyone should worry about the musical selections except you and FI.  I have yet to be at a wedding where music changed based on who was walking up the aisle, save for when the bride entranced. 

    If you don't care how the process up, leave it for your FI to figure out.  The way your FMIL is describing her entrance, it doesn't sound unusual.  Most weddings I have attended, the groom is already at the altar when the wedding party processes, but I don't think it would be unusual for the MOG to process with her son, as long as your FI is OK with it.  FWIW, I don't think denomination has anything to do with the way a wedding party processes, unless you are in a very traditional or orthodox church.
  • Does your FI want to walk his parents in/be walked in by his parents?  I'd try to get him to weigh in on this since there really isn't a right or a wrong way to stage an entrance.  I've seen grooms escorted by their parents, grooms walk in with the officiant, and grooms "appear" from a side aisle or hallway rather than using the main aisle.

    And I agree with PP.  If you aren't required by your venue/officiant to use certain songs, then if MOG has a preference for the processional, you could go with that for all of the family you are including (we did grandparents and our parents).  We had two song snippets for our entrance: one for family and bridal party, and one for me. 

    Our entrance order was:
    Groom, groomsmen and officiant
    Paternal Grandmother of the bride w/escort
    Maternal Grandfather of the bride w/escort
    Parents of the groom, together, no additional escort
    Bridal party
    Bride, with mom and dad

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    Anniversary


  • Thanks ladies! That's super helpful.

    There's some awkward family issues and Fi had originally planned to just come in on his own but then we had to rethink everything. We've had our fair share of issues throughout the planning process and I want everything as simple as possible. I think because Fi didn't ask or feel strongly about walking in with his parents I didn't want him to feel pushed into a corner...

    My Mom could care less about her "entrance" and would never really put it that way so I guess I had a little side eye ;)

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  • So at ours and the ones I've been to the groom walks in grandparents, his parents, brides mom then stands waiting for bride... But it's all in what you want.
  • I think it's all in what makes sense.   I have seen some of the moms get a little more into the details that involve them but I think that's all depending on the personality type.   My mom didn't give two hoots about what happened.   My MIL was VERY specific.   
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