Snarky Brides

"Helpful Hint"s from local wedding facebook page

I have missed you guys so much! Anyways... Get a load of this list from someone posting on a wedding consignment buy/sell page (my favorites are 1,2,13, 17,the condescension of 18, 20, 22, 25 

"So, I compiled a list of things I wish I was told before I started planning my wedding. Maybe this list will help a future bride or groom.

1. When picking your bridal party/groomsman list, pick individuals that are financially stable. There are other tasks you can give friends that may find is challenging to purchase bridal party attire or participate in events. This will save friendships.

2. DO NOT allow your bridal party to stress you out. If someone is showing you that they don’t TRULY want to be in your bridal party let them go and don’t look back. As much as you may want certain people to be a part of your day, if they are not showing how happy they are for you… let it go. Don’t hold grudges, just focus on your upcoming wedding, that’s what it important.

3. When picking your guest list, if you have ANY doubt at all about them attending.. REMOVE THEM. Only invite family and friends that you know care about you the most.

4. Leave the gossipers home. You will see peoples true colors throughout the process and some people will ONLY come to your wedding to talk about you. You know who these people are, leave them home.

5. Plan ahead. Pay for as much as you can ahead of time. Do not allow yourself and your future spouse to become financially stressed. It’s about the marriage, not the wedding.

6. Research all vendors. All reviews are not accurate or truthful. If they take too long to respond to you, or customer service is not A+… move on to the next one.

7. UNDERSTAND THAT YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR.
8. Yes, the DJ needs that amount of money. The DJ controls the biggest party of your life… PAY THEM. A lot more goes into being a DJ than just playing music.

9. It’s okay to have a long engagement. Do not rush yourself. Take time for detail… in most cases, you will only do this once.

10. At your wedding, please take a second to look around and take it all in. The evening will FLY by. If you don’t take that second.. it will be over before you know it.

11. First look photos are a good idea. It allows the videographer and photographer to capture more moments with you and your future spouse.

12. Catering will be one of your biggest bills. It’s okay to have one meal option and a veggie selection.

13. EVERY WEDDING NEEDS A PLANNER. DON’T SKIP IT. NO, AUNTIE CAN NOT DO IT. Pay a company that has experience with wedding planning. They will know sooooo much more than you or auntie Bertha.

14. Understand that there is still a mortgage and other bills after the wedding. Stay away from loans. You still have to live after you say I do

15. DO NOT STRESS. Another reason why you need a planner.

16. A reception dress isn’t a necessity, but it’s a great idea, If it’s in your budget… get one

17. Understand that it’s okay to lose some “friends” during the wedding planning process. Everyone is not meant to enter the next chapter of life with you.

18. If you have a groomzilla… (cough… LOUIE) allow him to be involved. Yes, most brides think it’s all about themselves that day… but it’s their day too

19. Understand that just because they are an inexpensive vendor, does not mean they are a good one. sometimes you have to dig a little deeper in your pockets to get the quality you are looking for.

20. Provide nail polish & accessories to your bridal party. This will ensure that everyone is uniform.

21. You, the bride, should get your bridal parties shoe sizes and order all bridal shoes at the same time online. It’s better than searching for sizes individually.

22. Let the bridal party/groomsman know in advance what the expenses are for attire, make up, hair, bachelorette, bachelor party… everything… in as much advance as possible. Allow them to make payments. It’s not easy to be a part of someone’s wedding. It can be expensive. This way, if they can’t pay for it, they can let you know in advance which will avoid confusion later.

23. WALK SLOWLY DOWN THE ASILE! I practically ran... Lol

24. Everyone will not bring you a gift. Accept it.

25. Lastly, make your wedding day about you and your spouse. All music, décor, moments.. should be about the both of you and what matters to you most! Your wedding Is not the one you saw on TCL…. It’s YOUR wedding.




Re: "Helpful Hint"s from local wedding facebook page

  • I agree with 23. I also practically ran, but most everything else is sooo entitled and gross.
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  • Is it terrible that I don't think this list is that bad? Though, I hope she didn't send it to anyone she knows...

    1. may not be entirely true, but she has a point. A wedding can be expensive and if a person is dealing with other financial issues, it's not fair to burden them with wedding expenses. 

    I don't see a problem with the list as long as she doesn't post it somewhere where people she knows might see it. 

    As brides, there's so much pressure to impress people you may not even like! Sounds like to me she's just saying, don't waste your time on those people. * shrug * 

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  • AJC430 said:
    Is it terrible that I don't think this list is that bad? Though, I hope she didn't send it to anyone she knows...

    1. may not be entirely true, but she has a point. A wedding can be expensive and if a person is dealing with other financial issues, it's not fair to burden them with wedding expenses. 

    I don't see a problem with the list as long as she doesn't post it somewhere where people she knows might see it. 

    As brides, there's so much pressure to impress people you may not even like! Sounds like to me she's just saying, don't waste your time on those people. * shrug * 
    But that isn't the brides decision to make for them. If I am asked to be a BM and can't afford it, I'll let the bride know thanks but no thanks. I'm an adult, I don't need someone else deciding that I don't have the money for x,y,z.
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  • justsie said:
    AJC430 said:
    Is it terrible that I don't think this list is that bad? Though, I hope she didn't send it to anyone she knows...

    1. may not be entirely true, but she has a point. A wedding can be expensive and if a person is dealing with other financial issues, it's not fair to burden them with wedding expenses. 

    I don't see a problem with the list as long as she doesn't post it somewhere where people she knows might see it. 

    As brides, there's so much pressure to impress people you may not even like! Sounds like to me she's just saying, don't waste your time on those people. * shrug * 
    But that isn't the brides decision to make for them. If I am asked to be a BM and can't afford it, I'll let the bride know thanks but no thanks. I'm an adult, I don't need someone else deciding that I don't have the money for x,y,z.
    Understood, but if a person's financial situation will cause me stress in the future, I can decide not to deal with that. 

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  • AJC430 said:
    justsie said:
    AJC430 said:
    Is it terrible that I don't think this list is that bad? Though, I hope she didn't send it to anyone she knows...

    1. may not be entirely true, but she has a point. A wedding can be expensive and if a person is dealing with other financial issues, it's not fair to burden them with wedding expenses. 

    I don't see a problem with the list as long as she doesn't post it somewhere where people she knows might see it. 

    As brides, there's so much pressure to impress people you may not even like! Sounds like to me she's just saying, don't waste your time on those people. * shrug * 
    But that isn't the brides decision to make for them. If I am asked to be a BM and can't afford it, I'll let the bride know thanks but no thanks. I'm an adult, I don't need someone else deciding that I don't have the money for x,y,z.
    Understood, but if a person's financial situation will cause me stress in the future, I can decide not to deal with that. 
    Why would someone else's finances cause you stress? Unless you are asking them to pay for things that are outside their budget, which if you are selecting your nearest and dearest because they can afford a more expensive dress to match your wedding vision.
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  • justsie said:
    AJC430 said:
    justsie said:
    AJC430 said:
    Is it terrible that I don't think this list is that bad? Though, I hope she didn't send it to anyone she knows...

    1. may not be entirely true, but she has a point. A wedding can be expensive and if a person is dealing with other financial issues, it's not fair to burden them with wedding expenses. 

    I don't see a problem with the list as long as she doesn't post it somewhere where people she knows might see it. 

    As brides, there's so much pressure to impress people you may not even like! Sounds like to me she's just saying, don't waste your time on those people. * shrug * 
    But that isn't the brides decision to make for them. If I am asked to be a BM and can't afford it, I'll let the bride know thanks but no thanks. I'm an adult, I don't need someone else deciding that I don't have the money for x,y,z.
    Understood, but if a person's financial situation will cause me stress in the future, I can decide not to deal with that. 
    Why would someone else's finances cause you stress? Unless you are asking them to pay for things that are outside their budget, which if you are selecting your nearest and dearest because they can afford a more expensive dress to match your wedding vision.
    Agreed. Unless the person has a history of saying they can afford something, then flaking or asking someone else to cover for them at the last minute, I generally trust my adult friends to balance their own budget and and be honest about what they can afford.
  • .... No one noticed that in the same list that she gave advice to, like, remember you have bills and a mortgage, she also advocated getting a wedding planner, a second dress, and paying a lot for vendors?
  • #17: OK, WOW just WOW, I feel as though this was an entitled, Bridezilla just with this one statement alone... I had a bridesmaid back out (actually MOH) 4 months before b/c of time and $$ and it was only disappointing, that she will not be up there with me, not stressful... have not lost her as a friend and we are 3 weeks away!

    #3: again childish "invite only the ones that care about you the most" what the what?

    #13 and #15: No wedding planner here just a descriptive timeline, and a pushy mom who photographs weddings and can keep people moving..

    #21: sounds like she had a uniform for her Maid Army!
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  • Is it an American thing for bridesmaids to pay for their own outfits? I'm English and every time I've been a bridesmaid the bride has paid for our dresses, shoes, hair and make up. I feel like if you're asking people to do it (and it is an honour) they should be part of the wedding budget.
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  • Sherbie25 said:
    Is it an American thing for bridesmaids to pay for their own outfits? I'm English and every time I've been a bridesmaid the bride has paid for our dresses, shoes, hair and make up. I feel like if you're asking people to do it (and it is an honour) they should be part of the wedding budget.
    Yes, that seems to be a UK thing. I agree with the policy and think if you are going to require a uniform you should pay for it, but I doubt that will ever change in the US. 

    I gave a general guideline (floral sundress) so they can wear whatever works for them. Honestly the more I think about it the more I wish I had asked them to wear whatever they want, but they are currently insisting I have to see and approve the sundresses beforehand (lolwut) so that may have caused them more headache rather than less.

    I would love for the UK trend to catch on here. I've probably spent close to $1k in the last 7 years on bridesmaid dresses and will have another $3-500 to spend based on my current circle of friends. When I was younger in particular and working 2-3 retail jobs, it REALLY sucked. My mom had to buy the dress for the first wedding I was ever in. I was 18 and didn't know at the time I could decline due to being poor haha.
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