Wedding Invitations & Paper

Forgot to send an invite!

Hello all I have a little bit of a problem.

We sent out invites almost two weeks ago and have started getting RSVPs in. I don't keep track of how old my cousins are and I just realized she's over 18. Her parents have sent back their RSVP without her (she lives with them). I know I shouldn't have missed her or expected her parents to RSVP with her, but I don't talk to my family much and it didn't cross my mind til I started getting RSVPs. Do I call and apologize and explain she's invited? Do I send an invite now? The RSVP due date isn't until next week, but I'd feel awful if she thought she was second tier by receiving a late invite!

Thanks for any advice!

Re: Forgot to send an invite!

  • Was this person always supposed to be invited?

  • I am just confused by your "I just realized she was over 18" line.  It seems like you are having an "adults only" wedding and she is only now going to make the list because you just realized her age.

  • I am just confused by your "I just realized she was over 18" line.  It seems like you are having an "adults only" wedding and she is only now going to make the list because you just realized her age.

    No it's as in I forgot since she's over 18 she needs her own invite and her parents didn't add her to theirs. I thought that was proper etiquette to receive your own invite over 18 regardless if you were living with your parents or not and I didn't remember she was over 18 until her parents sent their RSVP back.

    Even if I was having an adults only wedding and she was or wasn't over 18 I would be within etiquette to not invite her right? Yes she was always meant to be invited, she just slipped through the cracks is all.
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited September 2015
    ashtsb said:
    I am just confused by your "I just realized she was over 18" line.  It seems like you are having an "adults only" wedding and she is only now going to make the list because you just realized her age.

    No it's as in I forgot since she's over 18 she needs her own invite and her parents didn't add her to theirs. I thought that was proper etiquette to receive your own invite over 18 regardless if you were living with your parents or not and I didn't remember she was over 18 until her parents sent their RSVP back.

    Even if I was having an adults only wedding and she was or wasn't over 18 I would be within etiquette to not invite her right? Yes she was always meant to be invited, she just slipped through the cracks is all.
    I'm confused. If you thought she was under 18, why didn't you list her on her parents' invite? 

    It would have been really rude for her parents to add her if she wasn't listed. 
  • Was she on the list or not?  If she was to be invited regardless then just send out the invite now.  

    Mistakes happen. 






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 

  • lyndausvi said:
    Was she on the list or not?  If she was to be invited regardless then just send out the invite now.  

    Mistakes happen. 

    Yes she was on the invite list. I will send the invite out ASAP. Thank you!
  • ashtsb said:

    lyndausvi said:
    Was she on the list or not?  If she was to be invited regardless then just send out the invite now.  

    Mistakes happen. 

    Yes she was on the invite list. I will send the invite out ASAP. Thank you!
    Just send the invite out now. It's only been a couple weeks. I had 4 invites not get delivered because one reason or another, and we had to resend them. One was a friend of FH and all of his other friends got their invites and we didn't know his didn't get delivered until someone had brought up and asked if this guy was invited. We just reached out to him to let him know the invite was kicked back to us and that it was on his way and we were sorry for the delay. People, especialy your friends and family in the case of a wedding, are generally understanding of these small hiccups.
  • ashtsb said:
    I am just confused by your "I just realized she was over 18" line.  It seems like you are having an "adults only" wedding and she is only now going to make the list because you just realized her age.

    No it's as in I forgot since she's over 18 she needs her own invite and her parents didn't add her to theirs. I thought that was proper etiquette to receive your own invite over 18 regardless if you were living with your parents or not and I didn't remember she was over 18 until her parents sent their RSVP back.

    Even if I was having an adults only wedding and she was or wasn't over 18 I would be within etiquette to not invite her right? Yes she was always meant to be invited, she just slipped through the cracks is all.
    I'm confused. If you thought she was under 18, why didn't you list her on her parents' invite? 

    It would have been really rude for her parents to add her if she wasn't listed. 
    Yeah this is why I was confused.  If you didn't realize she was 18 then you would have listed her on her parents invite.

  • I would just call her and explain your mistake. Chalk it up to wedding craziness and hope she understands.
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