AMA

Swazzle

In all the years that I've been here, I've never done one of these. And right now, I am staring at the clock in desperate need of some entertainment so at the risk of it being the most boring thread with the least amount of posts in the history of TK, A(sk)M(e)A(nything). 

AlPacina

WHY DON'T YOU HAVE YOUR CUPCAKES YET?!?

Swazzle

AlPacina said:

WHY DON'T YOU HAVE YOUR CUPCAKES YET?!?

YOU TELL ME. 

When they do arrive, I will post a picture of me eating each and every one of them. 

[Deleted User]

What should I wear to the Thursday-night-mountain-top-but-moved-inside-a-La-Quinta wedding tonight?

Favorite trip ever?

Chocolate or vanilla?

Only one topping (besides cheese) on your pizza... what do you choose?

Red, white, pink, or other sauce on your pasta?

Swazzle

@CocoBellaF - 

What should I wear to the Thursday-night-mountain-top-but-moved-inside-a-La-Quinta wedding tonight?

You should wear cozy jams on your body and a couch under your butt. Aka STAY HOME! 

Favorite trip ever?

My honeymoon to South Africa. Nothing will ever compare! 

Chocolate or vanilla?

CHOCOLATE FO' LYFE

Only one topping (besides cheese) on your pizza... what do you choose?

Pepperoni. Sometimes extra pepperoni if I'm feeling fancy. 

Red, white, pink, or other sauce on your pasta?

Extra vodka sauce, hold the pasta, please! 

speakeasy14

How many times a day do you poop?

How many times a day do you trip over flat surfaces?

What is the most White Castle burgers you've eaten in one sitting?

Do you ever not leave a tip for someone?

How many pics of your boobs are there on your phone?

What's the last picture you took on your phone?

speakeasy14

Why are you slacking?

Swazzle

@speakeasy14 - 

How many times a day do you poop?

Usually at lest once a day but this week, I'm all screwed up. I didn't go for a few days and then yesterday I went constantly but they weren't good poops. You're welcome. 

How many times a day do you trip over flat surfaces?

At least once. I'm pretty clumsy. Not a flat surface but last week I tripped trying to go over a hip-high fence to get to my car after work (so, I was completely sober) and I twisted my ankle and have a massive bruise on my thigh from it. 

What is the most White Castle burgers you've eaten in one sitting?

Like... 2? I can't deal with the fact that they're fucking grey. H loves White Castle so I'll cave and have it like once a year. 

Do you ever not leave a tip for someone?

I've left a $0 tip exactly one time in my life. H and I went to eat near our old apartment. It was a fairly fancy restaurant. We got there early, around 5 and we were the only people in the restaurant until about 6:30 which is when our appetizers finally came out. Our entrees took another hour. We hadn't ordered anything fancy and our waitress was completely MIA. Like, didn't even check on us, give an update, nothing. When our entrees finally came out, she reappeared, I called her over to the table and was basically like WTF? She apologized, giving no reason for the ridiculous delay and offered us free dessert which we accepted and which then took another hour to come out while our waitress was completely MIA again. It was seriously horrific. I'm a firm believer that when I sit down to eat, the waiter starts at a 20% tip and it's up to them to go above and beyond or completely suck to change that amount. 

How many pics of your boobs are there on your phone?

LOL I have over 2000 pictures on my phone so I'm going to estimate 10. None are full boob/nip shots, though. 

What's the last picture you took on your phone?

I'm buying Lucy a velociraptor costume for Halloween and had the idea for H and I to dress up as JP rangers. I took a pic of these from some website to see if H approves (he does): 

Swazzle

speakeasy14 said:

Why are you slacking?

eilis1228

speakeasy14 said:

Why are you slacking?

speakeasy14

eilis1228

If you could do anything at all in this moment instead of work, what would you do?

Dream vacation?

Choose your favorite fur baby! Mwahahaha

Favorite sex position?

Please tell me the most epic thing you've ever done while intoxicated.

Swazzle

eilis1228 said:

speakeasy14 said:

Why are you slacking?

speakeasy14

Swazzle said:

How many times a day do you poop?

Usually at lest once a day but this week, I'm all screwed up. I didn't go for a few days and then yesterday I went constantly but they weren't good poops. You're welcome. 

I'm lacking anymore creative questions, so I'll stick with gifs to entertain you. 

Swazzle

@eilis1228 - 

If you could do anything at all in this moment instead of work, what would you do?

I would be at home, snuggling on the couch with H and the babies. I'm so jealous of how early he gets home. It's just not fair. (Except it is, he gets to work at 5am)

Dream vacation?

I'm dying to go to Alaska 

Choose your favorite fur baby! Mwahahaha

Omg out of my own? 

Favorite sex position?

Me on top

Please tell me the most epic thing you've ever done while intoxicated.

Oh god. OK this is a pretty good one: I went out in the city with my aunt (who I'm appropriately named after, go figure) and some of her coworkers and clients. Drinking/entertaining is big in our industry. So we discovered some new shot that night and had about a billion of them without eating. I went into the bathroom and came out and my aunt was gone. She got in the company car and left without me even though she was supposed to have them drop me off at my apartment on the way home. So instead of paying the $40ish to take a cab back to Jersey City, I pay $10ish and take it to the Path train which runs between NYC and Jersey City. I called H before I went down to the train platform to let him know that I was getting on and to pick me up in about 20 minutes. I get on the train and apparently dozed off for a little but when I opened my eyes, I was at my stop. PERFECT TIMING! I walk upstairs and H is charging at me, screaming, "WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!" And I'm all "Dude, I can't make the train go any faster." And that's when I found out that I fell asleep on the Path train and rode it back and forth between the World Trade Center and Newark for about 3 hours. The next day, I found out that my aunt told the driver her neighbor's address and when he dropped her off, she tried to break into the house thinking it was her own. The cops were called and it was sorted out and she sent the neighbors flowers and the police department cookies to apologize. 

ETF grammar

AlPacina

If you could trade lives with someone for a day, who would it be?

Same question, but choose someone from NEY?

What made you want to know about our butt hair?

Would you take a bath in guacamole for 15 minutes if it meant you got free freshly-made guacamole for the rest of your life?

What's the farthest you've gone (with a boy) in a movie theater?

Is it okay that I'm only posting on here? I'm really busy today and am using this post for a break.

Swazzle

@AlPacina - 

If you could trade lives with someone for a day, who would it be?

Jennifer Lawrence

Same question, but choose someone from NEY?

@cu97tiger because I want to see how it feels to be so bad ass at working out and maybe then I can adapt it into my own life. Plus she's pretty

What made you want to know about our butt hair?

I asked that question on here a long time ago and some people said they don't have butt hair (like, naturally -- not from waxing) and I don't like lying liars. 

Would you take a bath in guacamole for 15 minutes if it meant you got free freshly-made guacamole for the rest of your life?

I would do that in a heartbeat, no questions asked. 

What's the farthest you've gone (with a boy) in a movie theater?

I think I touched a naked peen once in the movies when I was a wee lass. 

Is it okay that I'm only posting on here? I'm really busy today and am using this post for a break.

wink0erin

Do you do any crafty type activities?

How many states have you visited?

Which one is your fave?

If you had to choose whether to skydive or bungee jump, which would you do?

 

Swazzle

@wink0erin - 

Do you do any crafty type activities?

Does coloring in my coloring books count? If yes, then yes! If not, then no. Sadly, I'm not very creative. 

How many states have you visited?

20 

Which one is your fave?

Ohhh good question. I like a lot of them for different reasons. I actually really like New Jersey because it's in a great location. We have the ocean, mountains (small ones, that is), and I can be in 4 major cities (NYC, Philly, Boston, DC) within 5 hours. And my family lives here H and I went through New England last year on a roadtrip and I really fell in love with Maine and New Hampshire. 

If you had to choose whether to skydive or bungee jump, which would you do?

I honestly couldn't do either. I'm afraid of heights. Even thinking about it makes me want to puke! 

jenjen047

@swazzle - That story about falling asleep on the train is hiarious!!

I am blanking and can only think of 1 question:

What's your worst habit?

jenna8984

Do you guys want kids? If so, do you have a timeline for starting? (have never really heard you mention it yet)

In the winter do you shave your entire leg, below the knee only, or not even bother?

What did you do with your wedding gown? How many did you try on until you found that one?

Do you own any tv shows on DVD? Or do you have a go-to DVD that you watch on a sick day/ snow day? (for me it's the same)

Do you remember what your SAT score was? Did you get into your top college choice?

Swazzle

@jenjen047 - 

What's your worst habit?

I am so lazy! I would live (have lived) on the couch in front of the TV for-ev-er. 

Swazzle

@jenna8984 - 

Do you guys want kids? If so, do you have a timeline for starting? (have never really heard you mention it yet)

While we haven't officially and completely ruled it out, neither of us have ever felt a need to have kids and we like our life the way it is now. 

In the winter do you shave your entire leg, below the knee only, or not even bother?

Below the knee only.

What did you do with your wedding gown? How many did you try on until you found that one?

It's hanging in my closet, still dirty from 2 years, 5 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days ago. I tried on about a billion and two. Ironically, I had pinned my wedding dress very shortly after getting engaged but kind of forgot about it and was about to buy a different, but similar one. I found a shop nearby that had it in stock so I went there by myself to try it on and it was perfect

Do you own any tv shows on DVD? Or do you have a go-to DVD that you watch on a sick day/ snow day? (for me it's the same)

I own SATC, The Sopranos, Family Guy, Seinfeld, a few seasons of Grey's, and I think that's it. SATC is my go-to. 

Do you remember what your SAT score was? Did you get into your top college choice?

Yup, I took it two times and got an 1110 both times so I figured that was a sign. I only applied to 2 colleges and I got into both of them. 

jenna8984

I got 1110 too! It was funny, my parents made me take it again because generally people do better but I guess I was not giving a shit the second time because my score went down to like 950 hahaha.

I'm a below the knee girl too lol

Swazzle

@jenna8984 - Unless I'm wearing a bathing suit or shorts, I don't see a point in shaving above the knee. Ain't nobody got time for that! I wore a dress with boots today and shaved my legs for the first time in almost a week lol

Swazzle

Thanks for helping me through the afternoon, guys! 

speakeasy14

Your train story is amazing. And I almost did the same thing after our get together.

AlPacina

@swazzle -

cu97tiger

Swazzle said:

@AlPacina - 

If you could trade lives with someone for a day, who would it be?

Jennifer Lawrence

Same question, but choose someone from NEY?

@cu97tiger because I want to see how it feels to be so bad ass at working out and maybe then I can adapt it into my own life. Plus she's pretty

I freaking love you.

minskat30

Fuck! I missed this. I was feeding hungry families at my volunteer event so I did have a good reason but still!

Can I still ask questions? Screw it, I'm going to.

If you could go back in time and relive any moment of your life, what would you relive?

If you could have met your H earlier in life, would you?

If you had to choose, would you choose not to age or to stay the same (perfect for you) size for life?

Sexiest piece of lingerie in your ownership - describe it.

If you had to give up all forms of avocado for life or beer, which would you sacrifice?

If you could erase one thing from your memory, what would you choose?

If you could pick one song in history to be the inspiration for when it was written, which one would it be?

Swazzle

@minskat30 - DO GOODER! (Kidding, obviously. You're awesome.) 

If you could go back in time and relive any moment of your life, what would you relive?
Spending time with my Poppop before he had a stroke and passed away. I miss him so much. 

If you could have met your H earlier in life, would you?

Nope. I was a ho fo' sho prior to meeting H and I think I met him at the perfect time for settling down. We were both young (21, about to be 22) and we managed to grow together through our 20s. 

If you had to choose, would you choose not to age or to stay the same (perfect for you) size for life?

Stay the same size for life! OMG how amazing would that be?! I wouldn't want to fuck with the age thing because as much as getting old sucks (health problems and wrinkles and all that), I wouldn't want to watch everyone around me age without me! However, bring on the pizza and Big Macs if I could stay the same size forever. 

Sexiest piece of lingerie in your ownership - describe it.

I don't really do lingerie! I own a couple things from my shower but they're not very scandalous. A hot pink corset with a matching thong is probably the wildest thing I have. 

If you had to give up all forms of avocado for life or beer, which would you sacrifice?

I would... give up avocado. I LOVE beer. 

If you could erase one thing from your memory, what would you choose?

The Eagles losing the Superbowl in '04

If you could pick one song in history to be the inspiration for when it was written, which one would it be?

Flawless by Beyonce. Kidding! I really have no idea. This is a tough one.