Do we need centerpieces? (short reception)

Vic&Jess

Hi All,

It's my very first post on the knot. To summarize our wedding: my sweet Fiancé and I will be having a traditional Catholic wedding (the typical hour ceremony) which will be followed by a cake and champagne toast. We're not decorating the church, we will have a welcome table, we will be providing several charcuterie boards for a light snack, coffee, water, soda and a signature bride/groom drink. Our music will be from our I-pod shuffle, we'll have our first dance, then a dance with our guests, then combining the toasts with the cake cutting and we're out! We'll have a wedding supper with the small bridal party and our immediate family members. 

So my question is do we need to get centerpieces for the tables in the church hall since we're not having much of a reception and we're not decorating the hall? Thanks in advanced

GlamQueenBride

scribe95 said:

Lots of brides and grooms pay for their own wedding. You aren't unique or different. Why don't you just wait to save money and have the event you want in the first place?

I don't see the problem with them having an anniversary party to celebrate their anniversary.

STARMOON44

I think this sounds very nice and you don't need centerpieces.

JediElizabeth

Vic&Jess said:

Hi All,

It's my very first post on the knot. To summarize our wedding: my sweet Fiancé and I will be having a traditional Catholic wedding (the typical hour ceremony) which will be followed by a cake and champagne toast. We're not decorating the church, we will have a welcome table, we will be providing several charcuterie boards for a light snack, coffee, water, soda and a signature bride/groom drink. Our music will be from our I-pod shuffle, we'll have our first dance, then a dance with our guests, then combining the toasts with the cake cutting and we're out! We'll have a wedding supper with the small bridal party and our immediate family members. 

So my question is do we need to get centerpieces for the tables in the church hall since we're not having much of a reception and we're not decorating the hall? Thanks in advanced

No. You do not need centerpieces. I'm having a sit-down dinner reception, and I probably wouldn't have centerpieces if they weren't included in the cost of the venue, because I just don't see the reason to spend the money on them. It's certainly not required for you.

To the bolded - it's certainly a nice thing to have dinner with your family and wedding party after the reception, but please don't call this a wedding supper. It makes it part of the wedding ceremony, and implies a tiered reception.

You will have your ceremony, followed by a small, cake & toast reception. Then the wedding is over. You having dinner with family & friends that night should be a separate event.

justsie

I agree with PP, what you are doing sounds a lot like a tiered reception, which would be very rude. I'm not sure I understand the dance with the guest part, do you mind explaining? Are you telling your guests that they only have one song to dance to?

GlamQueenBride

No, you don't need centerpieces. No one really "needs" them. They just put them out to make the tables nicer. But with such a short reception, it certainly isn't necessary.

I know you're having a cake and toast reception, which is fine so long as the guests are aware either by you letting them know or by time of day making it clear. You don't want any of your guests to be expecting a meal and only getting cake and champagne instead.

MesmrEwe

To the core question - you don't need formal centerpieces.  While it is nice to have at least a little something (candle/mirror, bud vase with a single bloom DIY, etc.), it's not necessary. 

But really - it sounds like you're doing a tiered reception which is a big etiquette no-go...  Even though you're leaving that doesn't mean your guests aren't going to sit around and chat it up, and it's going to be rude to hear anyone on the dinner invite list to say "Sorry, we've got to go meet B&G for dinner!".  It almost sounds like you're using the Parish hall in a way or are you having a specific reception hall.  Are you doing your toast then going to Saturday mass as the "break point" for the reception then meeting up with the WP/SO/Family for informal dinner?  Something just isn't adding up on that aspect. 

Jen4948

You don't need to have centerpieces, but you do need to invite all your guests to all of your reception-it's very, very rude to invite any of your guests only to a portion of it.  A "light snack" with all your guests followed by a "wedding supper" with only your immediate family and wedding party members is a tiered reception, which is a huge breach of etiquette.

Vic&Jess

Hi Ladies,

Thanks for all the responses. scribe95 nailed it! Our ceremony will be at 2pm and all guests are invited to the reception which starts at 3pm and should be done by 5pm. We cannot afford a sit down dinner for everyone therefore we sent out announcements with no r.s.v.p. instead of a wedding invitation letting everyone know "the ceremony will be followed by a cake and champagne toast."

Our immediate family and the small wedding party will join us for dinner at 8pm (at a restaurant that holds a special meaning to us).

Vic&Jess

Hi justsie,

Thanks for your reply. I'm not having a tiered reception. We're just having dinner at a later time with immediate family and the Maid of Honor and Best Man. To clarify the dancing.. there will be ambient music in the hall. We have a friend who will sing our first dance live. He'll also sing another slow dance song so that our guests could feel they had some participation with us on the dance floor.

Due to the short time frame it doesn't give us much room for a dance party atmosphere. We're planning a sit down dinner and party for our 1 year anniversary since our budget doesn't allow for it this year. Thanks for your question.

Vic&Jess

Hi scribe95 we've had quite a few friends that had their ceremony and small reception due to budget constraints and then had a full blown party at a later time. It works out and we have full support from friends and family. They really like the idea and understand that it's just the groom and myself paying and handling everything (absolutely no one is helping us monetarily with our wedding).

Vic&Jess

Thank you GlamQueenBride!

Vic&Jess

Thank you STARMOON44!