Wedding Woes

I want to know if this is every day or like, once or twice a week.

Dear Prudence,
I have a terrific husband, and our marriage is a happy and fulfilling one. But there’s one thing that over the years has continued to drive me nuts. When I’ve finished dinner and I call my husband to the table, he stalls. Sometimes it takes him 15 minutes to finally come to the table. I put a lot of effort into making tasty meals, and it irritates me that he tells me he’s hungry before I cook, but when it’s ready, he takes his good old time getting to the table. I’ve expressed my frustration several times in past, but ultimately he doesn’t adjust his behavior. I know this is a fairly minor annoyance and he’s the one who suffers the cold dinner, but I also think it’s an easy thing to change. Should I just accept that he’s always going to be slow to the table? (For the record, he does like my cooking, so he’s not dragging feet out of dread.)
–Annoyed Chef

Re: I want to know if this is every day or like, once or twice a week.

  • He doesn't like her cooking.
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  • Just read the last line. I still will keep My theory.
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  • Agreed Nola.  It seems that it's a passive-aggressive race to the bottom on both their parts.  
  • Yep - he thinks her cooking is for crap...
  • DH and I have this problem in reverse.  He does most of our cooking and gets annoyed if I don't immediately jump up to the table the instant that he says dinner is ready.  If I don't get there immediately, it usually means I'm in the middle of something and want to finish my task before abandoning it.  Sometimes it's as simple as finishing a text message I'm writing.  Sometimes I'm in the middle of a bigger task (like work or paying bills) and I either am almost done and want to finish up or I want to get to a good stopping point. Sometimes it's just wanting to finishing writing the thought path I'm on before forgetting it. Usually my delay is only 1-2 minutes... maybe 5 minutes at most.  It has nothing to do with not liking DH's food (he is an awesome cook).  It's just a matter of hating leaving something unfinished when I leave it. But, even delaying 1-2 minutes annoys DH.  And we have had our discussions about it.  I will usually try to make getting up quickly for dinner a priority, if I can. If I'm working on something that may be more involved, I will sometimes tell him to give me 5 minutes advanced warning before food is ready, so I can get to a good stopping point.  But, the rare delays do still happen.

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