Bridesmaids Dresses

[Deleted User]

So I have a two part question.  The first is I have a black and ivory wedding dress, and am trying to decide on bridesmaids dresses.  What I'm thinking is long ivory dresses or long black dresses.  We're having a formal late afternoon wedding and evening reception at a castle.  I love long black dresses for this reason, but is it too dark with the black details in my dress?



The second question is that I'm trying to ask them each privately what their budget is.  So far one gave me a pretty high number, but said she was flexible, and another two have just sort of said whatever (one said the cheaper the better, while the other didn't really give any indication, just that she doesn't want to be the source of stress for me so whatever I like).  What's the best way to proceed?  I've told them that I would start sending them dress examples and they would just have to let me know if it's out of their price range, but I worry about their willingness to be upfront.  Honestly, if the price ranges vary or we can't settle on a particular dress then I'm just going to tell them a length and colour, and won't be bothered in the slightest, but yeah, I try explaining that and all I get is "whatever you want!"  
  

thisismynickname2

I think long black dresses would be great with your wedding dress- which is fabulous, by the way, love it. It's not too dark. Don't forget about your bouquets which could add a nice pop of color or, even if all white, would contrast nicely against the black. The BMs could do some fun statement necklaces with the black dresses too. 

Good on you for inquiring privately about the budget. Long dresses are more expensive but seems like they're willing to be flexible. 
I like the "long and [color]" route. Just keep repeating "whatever YOU want." They'll figure it out. My BMs wore black cocktail dresses and two of the three had a really hard time not being dictated what to wear, but ultimately chose dresses they really like and have worn again. The third pulled a black dress from her closet, and the fourth woman- a groomswoman- also pulled a black dress from her closet. It works! Try telling them that bridesmaids look more comfortable in dresses they've chosen for themselves rather in dresses they're forced to wear. The picture you posted here illustrates that very well. 

Good luck! 

labro

Definitely go for long and black! Plus it'll be easier to go the route of "choose your own dress as long as it's long and black" and that makes it easier on everyone to stick within the budget. I had a really hard time getting a specific number out of everyone in my bridal party too. It really just took some direct conversations of "Your comfort is important to me and I don't want to choose a designer/dress/whatever that's outside of your comfort level". It was definitely hard to get past the "Whatever you want, you're the bride" mentality from some of my friends because it's just so built in to the old expectations of what it meant to be a bridesmaid.

AddieCake

I vote black.

Maggie0829

I vote black and to tell them to buy whatever long black dress they want.

charlotte989875

I vote black too. I would also suggest asking the BM who said "the cheaper the better" for a number if you are going to select the dress. If you're going to let them choose their own (which I highly recommend) then they can select a dress in their own price range. I would recommend giving them a fabric so that makes their choices a bit easier.

Also, your dress is gorgeous!