Loving an animal over your SO?

princessleia22

DH and I both love our dogs. I agree that it's a different kind of love and it would depend on the scenario.  When I met DH, I don't think I would have pursued a relationship with him if he were severely allergic to cats or dogs or just didn't like them, because that I know my pets are a big part of my life that I'm not willing to give up.  If he were to suddenly develop an allergy now, it would be a tougher choice, but I don't think he would even give up the dogs. DH and I have both said that in a fire or emergency, we'd each grab the dogs first and expect that the other person can fend for themselves.  DH has also said that he would totally go back into a burning house if there was any chance to save our pets, even if it meant risking his own life further.

Same thing with DH vs. dog hanging over a bridge, my first instinct is that DH has better ability to get himself out of that and my dog would need my assistance more. That would have the best chance of both surviving. Of course, I'm not sure how I would really react in that situation, if it really was life or death.  And if I saved dog and DH died, I'm not sure I could ever forgive myself.  But, if I chose DH, I would always wonder if DH could have saved himself if I saved the dog. That's just one of those "what if" questions that you don't know the answer to unless faced with it, and I hope never to learn the real answer. But, I'm not sure I would say I love my dogs over DH.

SP29

It is a weird comment to make... also weird to name your house...

In some ways, I get the sentiment... but it depends, and it is different.

As a PP said, losing an animal hurts- I've lost my heart cat, who I had for 19 years- I will always miss him. If I lost DH, I'd be a miserable wreck, unable to function. 

However, back when we were dating, before I moved to AB to be with him, DH wanted me to move sooner, and I always told him, "I will not move unless my cats and my horse come with me". In this sense I agree with what a PP said, "I wouldn't be with someone who would put me in a position of heartache by making me give up my animal"- health and safety issues aside. At first, DH didn't like this- but I told him, my animals rely on me for their care and they aren't disposable, he can take care of himself and we can work it out long distance until the time is right. It all worked out in the end, and now DH is a big cat lover too. 

We would give up our own comforts if one of our pets needed medical attention- for sure, but that doesn't mean I'd give up DH. 

drunkenwitch

1) our house is named, many of our friend's have also named their houses. Not weird to me.

2) context, context, context. The house is burning, I have enough time to save BF or the cat. Yes, ideally I save them both, but BF first. When BF and I got together, my beloved Smudge and I had been together for 11 years. If at any point he had told me it was "him or the cat" his ass would have been on the curb in 10 seconds flat.

[Deleted User]

This came up with my hubby and I. He is NOT an animal person.. I am.. I have a dog that I'd had almost 8 years before I met him. He asked once what would happen if he told me he wouldn't live in a house with a dog (at that point we were talking moving in together) I told him not to ask questions he didn't want the real answer to. He makes it very clear he does not like that dog but he lives with him. They kind of have a mutual dislike at this point.  With that being said we now have a baby on the way my pup is 10 now. I hope we do not have any issues if we do it's going to be a very hard day for me. But as someone else said I will not have a dog that I need to worry about around my child.

badbnagdway

I crate our girl dog most weeknights because she bothers DH by taking up too much space, hogging the covers, and randomly licking him. I think he knows this is a large sacrifice from me as she is my super snuggle bunny. 

levioosa

I definitely get loving an animal, but what I don't understand is when people let animals trump health and safety because "they love the animal more."  For example, I saw this one episode of Cat From Hell where this couple had a brand new baby, and the cat kept attacking it.  Like, multiple times the cat had scratched the shit out of the baby's face, and the baby hadn't even done anything to aggravate it.  It was so bad they literally couldn't turn around or the cat would attack the baby.  I'm sorry, but that cat would be gone, or it would quickly become a "garage only/outdoor only" cat.  If I remember, the cat was also spraying around the house a shit ton.    


SO had a cat I didn't like.  He freaking loved her...like, too much. But I would have never asked him to give her up for me, even when she peed on my stuff or chose me to bite in the middle of the night when she wanted to leave the room.  I'm an adult and I knew she'd been with him since she was a kitten and since before I was in the picture.  I was intruding on their space.  I got it.  She was a jealous bitch.  But he was so torn up when she died a few months ago.  It was heartbreaking, and I wouldn't have wished that on him ever, even if it meant dealing with "bitch cat" (as his sister and I used to call her), for 10 more years.