Second Weddings

Vow Renewal

I hope it's OK for me to join your board. I just realize that the Vow Renewal board is very quiet.

My husband just brought up the idea of a vow renewal a few days ago. We'll have been married 12 years in August, which is significant because his first marriage ended in divorce after 12 years.

I only have 3 months to plan! Yikes! We're on a strict budget and I'm deciding on a dress right now--trying to decide between not wearing a wedding dress at all or wearing one that doesn't scream wedding. 

Re: Vow Renewal

  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    edited May 2016
    Here is a good etiquette guide to vow renewals.  Please don't wear a wedding dress.

    http://www.idotaketwo.com/blog/vow-renewal-etiquette-2/

    Vow renewals may be held for important occasions, but, personally, I think it's a little weird that your DH thinks that surpassing his first, unsuccessful marriage in time is something to celebrate.  I would wait until your 15th or 20th anniversary.

    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    ScottishSarahholyguacamole79ViczaesarKnottie1452098987
  • EstherK said:
    I hope it's OK for me to join your board. I just realize that the Vow Renewal board is very quiet.

    My husband just brought up the idea of a vow renewal a few days ago. We'll have been married 12 years in August, which is significant because his first marriage ended in divorce after 12 years.

    I only have 3 months to plan! Yikes! We're on a strict budget and I'm deciding on a dress right now--trying to decide between not wearing a wedding dress at all or wearing one that doesn't scream wedding. 

    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • I have to say I agree.  It seems like the day will be tinged with sadness and bad memories, for both your husband's families and yours.  It seems like the focus will not be on your marriage but almost celebrating the end of the last one.

    How do you really feel about it OP?  I know for me I wouldn't want to think about past serious relationships when celebrating the one we already have.

    bohobrideCASP29mollybarker11Knottie1452098987
  • lnixon8lnixon8
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    I would put that money towards a nice dinner (maybe offer to treat a few close friends or family memebrs) or a vacation for you and your husband.


  • photokittyphotokitty where I want to be
    Moderator Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    mod
    If I was a guest and knew the rationale behind the view renewal, and I would probably ask bc 12 is a random year, I would be super uncomfortable. I'd wait and save up for number 15. I mean you're inn it for the long haul and going to make it, so why rush?
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

    Knottie1452098987
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    I think you should wait until year 15. Making it longer than a previous marriage and then calling attention to that with a celebration is weird to me. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
    SP29
  • Go on a cruise and have a private vow renewal, just the two of you.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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