Malapropisms - my personal hell

charlottesmom0626

banana468 said:

And I LOATHE the dropped infinitive.  

If your floor is dirty it needs to be mopped.  Do not say,"The floor needs mopped."

don't visit Pittsburgh. Everything needs done there. 

OurWildKingdom

charlottesmom0626 said:

banana468 said:

And I LOATHE the dropped infinitive.  

If your floor is dirty it needs to be mopped.  Do not say,"The floor needs mopped."

don't visit Pittsburgh. Everything needs done there. 

Nor Northeast Ohio.

banana468

OurWildKingdom said:

charlottesmom0626 said:

banana468 said:

And I LOATHE the dropped infinitive.  

If your floor is dirty it needs to be mopped.  Do not say,"The floor needs mopped."

don't visit Pittsburgh. Everything needs done there. 

Nor Northeast Ohio.

DH and I enjoy teasing our OH-born SIL who does this.  

vikinganna87

TrixieJess said:

I used to have a boss, A BOSS who used "insure" instead of "ensure". It would drive me batty. I would proof all his outgoing copies and change it to completely different wording...he would change it back!

Asshole...who's the one with the English degree?

If I like the person I really don't care if they use words incorrectly or mispronounce things.  But when self-ordained intellectuals, English teachers or prissy lifestyle dictators make mistakes it drive me crazy.  

"Expresso" hurts my ears.  So does "case and point." 

thisismynickname2

Sidenote, but this is why I feel it's so important children and teens read a lot. In reading through this thread, there's a lot that I've heard before and I think much of it has to do with just regional speak. But, if you read a lot, proper grammar (and proper use of fun phrases) gets fairly ingrained in your head. Although I find myself guilty of using improper grammar when casually speaking, when I put thought into my writing I write pretty well. 

ShesSoCold

"Chipolte" irritates the piss out of me.

TrixieJess

thisismynickname said:

Sidenote, but this is why I feel it's so important children and teens read a lot. In reading through this thread, there's a lot that I've heard before and I think much of it has to do with just regional speak. But, if you read a lot, proper grammar (and proper use of fun phrases) gets fairly ingrained in your head. Although I find myself guilty of using improper grammar when casually speaking, when I put thought into my writing I write pretty well. 

Also, learning a second language helps. We learn French starting in early elementary school and all the grammar that goes with it. I found it easy to transpose that grammar to English and then to Italian and Latin when I took those languages in High School.

lovesclimbing

thisismynickname said:

Sidenote, but this is why I feel it's so important children and teens read a lot. In reading through this thread, there's a lot that I've heard before and I think much of it has to do with just regional speak. But, if you read a lot, proper grammar (and proper use of fun phrases) gets fairly ingrained in your head. Although I find myself guilty of using improper grammar when casually speaking, when I put thought into my writing I write pretty well. 

I completely agree. And not just that, reading a lot significantly expands your vocabulary. 

lnixon8

thisismynickname said:

Sidenote, but this is why I feel it's so important children and teens read a lot. In reading through this thread, there's a lot that I've heard before and I think much of it has to do with just regional speak. But, if you read a lot, proper grammar (and proper use of fun phrases) gets fairly ingrained in your head. Although I find myself guilty of using improper grammar when casually speaking, when I put thought into my writing I write pretty well. 

Until you read a lot and are a smart ass:

My parents were discussing what they need from the grocery store. Dad says to Mom "wonder bread, kraft mac and cheese and white american cheese". Brother pipes up "Ugh! You two are the epitome of white trash!" Pronounced "EP-uh-tome (rhmes with home)

thisismynickname2

lnixon8 said:

thisismynickname said:

Sidenote, but this is why I feel it's so important children and teens read a lot. In reading through this thread, there's a lot that I've heard before and I think much of it has to do with just regional speak. But, if you read a lot, proper grammar (and proper use of fun phrases) gets fairly ingrained in your head. Although I find myself guilty of using improper grammar when casually speaking, when I put thought into my writing I write pretty well. 

Until you read a lot and are a smart ass:

My parents were discussing what they need from the grocery store. Dad says to Mom "wonder bread, kraft mac and cheese and white american cheese". Brother pipes up "Ugh! You two are the epitome of white trash!" Pronounced "EP-uh-tome (rhmes with home)

Hahaha.
Or you read so much you never find out how things are really pronounced. Like Ted in How I Met Your Mother with the word "chameleon." Cham-a-lee-on. 

LadyCatherineDB

Out of everything I've seen [as a copy editor], my biggest grammar pet peeve is when people mix up compose and comprise. I don't know why, but it really bothers me.

short+sassy

TV court show junky here.  When claimants use the word "borrowed" when they really mean "loaned".  As in, "I borrowed her $200 because she was short on rent."

Here is the dialogue from one of my (and my H's) all-time favorite scenes from Family Guy.  It involves the occasional character ex-g/f of Brian the dog, voiced by Drew Barrymore.  She is always portrayed as an airhead.  In the scene, she is bragging about her current b/f (sitting next to her):

G/F:  "He speaks Orange!"  (The first time we saw it, my H and I were looking at each other like "What is she talking about?")

New B/F:  "That's Mandarin, honey."

G/F:  "YEAH!  Mandolin!"

drglitter

Last night FH was trying to tell me a story about something and mentioned the "bob wire". And then it went something like this..

Me: "Bob wire?"
Him: "Yeah"
Me: "Do you mean barbed wire?"
Him: "No, bob wire"
Me: "You're really sure you don't mean barbed wire?"
Him: "No, bob wire. The wire with the little spikes on it."
Me: "Yeah, those would be barbs."

I'm wondering if he thinks there's a farmer out there somewhere named Bob who's collecting royalties.

OurWildKingdom

vikinganna87 said:

TrixieJess said:

I used to have a boss, A BOSS who used "insure" instead of "ensure". It would drive me batty. I would proof all his outgoing copies and change it to completely different wording...he would change it back!

Asshole...who's the one with the English degree?

If I like the person I really don't care if they use words incorrectly or mispronounce things.  But when self-ordained intellectuals, English teachers or prissy lifestyle dictators make mistakes it drive me crazy.  

"Expresso" hurts my ears.  So does "case and point." 

FW occasionally uses malapropisms and struggles with spelling, and it doesn't bother me. In fact, I think it's cute when she asks me how to spell something. But when professionals make errors, it annoys me no end.

vikinganna87

It seems like every day I see someone using everyday wrong.  It's an everyday occurrence, which means it happens every day.  But somehow, everywhere I turn people are writing "she makes me so happy everyday" or "you can get this deal everyday."  I cry a little bit inside every time I see it.

madamerwin

vikinganna87 said:

It seems like every day I see someone using everyday wrong.  It's an everyday occurrence, which means it happens every day.  But somehow, everywhere I turn people are writing "she makes me so happy everyday" or "you can get this deal everyday."  I cry a little bit inside every time I see it.

I hate this too! I have to explain to people I work with (when I am proof reading) why I corrected "everyday" to "every day". "Everyday" is an adjective, and therefore there must be a noun following it. I tell people that if they are having trouble remembering, to replace "everyday/every day" with "today." If the sentence still makes sense, then you should be using "every day."

Same with anytime/any time. I think there are a few others, too.

flantastic

"Sike" or some such spelling, back when people still said "Psych." Way to show everyone that you have no idea what the idiom you are using actually means.

I am with all those who twitch over the misplaced apostrophes, especially when people are trying to pluralize. No, you do not need all that. Just an "s" (usually) would have been fine.

And in defense of "I could care less," although it's not a thing I really say: I think the original meaning was truly like a "Well, I COULD probably care less, but it'd be difficult."

thisismynickname2

flantastic said:

"Sike" or some such spelling, back when people still said "Psych." Way to show everyone that you have no idea what the idiom you are using actually means.

I am with all those who twitch over the misplaced apostrophes, especially when people are trying to pluralize. No, you do not need all that. Just an "s" (usually) would have been fine.

And in defense of "I could care less," although it's not a thing I really say: I think the original meaning was truly like a "Well, I COULD probably care less, but it'd be difficult."

I just wrote a remark to my local chamber of commerce Facebook page over improper use of possessive apostrophe. They posted a link to an article on their own page, which then linked to an article from a popular magazine. The magazine had it right; the chamber of commerce did not. It was "residents' favorite places," but they posted "resident's favorite places."

I can't stand that professional entities put out stuff that's grammatically incorrect. What is business coming to?