Snarky Brides

Time-Bomb Weekend Wedding

coffeepartycoffeeparty member
First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its
edited July 2016 in Snarky Brides
OK I have to vent about this debacle I am witnessing unfold.

So the bride is a relative of mine and I've got a front-row seat to all of this. The wedding is coming up next month & I'm honestly wondering if it's going to fall apart before the date hits. So here's the rundown:

Bride and her FI have been engaged for YEARS and have talked about getting married for a long time. You would think that over the course of those years they'd save up money, right? Wrong. They haven't saved a cent and are banking on doing things as cheaply as possible.

No paid photographer ("We were thinking everyone has smartphones nowadays anyway, our guests can take all the photos!"), no catering (there's an open fire pit and some picnic tables.. for a WEEKEND destination wedding with no refrigeration or electricity), a friend is voluntarily officiating, another friend is gifting the wedding cake, the invitations were generic freebies printed online & and contained no personal information on them (as in, mine didn't have my name OR my SO's name on the RSVP at all and the outer envelope was only addressed to me)/hardly any details about the event itself. They looked like those punch-out elementary school cardstock valentines.

They're holding the ceremony outdoors in the middle of a public park. They wanted it to be held at a small "historic viewpoint" at the top of a narrow trail that you have to hike 20 minutes from the parking lot to get to, with ZERO seating, in an area that cannot be reserved for private events & is a major tourist landmark in the area, on a summer weekend. They found out after they'd already sent out the invites that groups of 10 or more are not permitted at all so now they're just going to hold the ceremony down at the open recreational area.

Bride complained about this because "it's not as pretty" and said they were toying with the idea of having a SECRET CEREMONY up at the viewpoint the night before with just themselves, a few select friends, and the officiant before everyone showed up for their destination weekend wedding 4 hours away from civilization and plumbing. I told her to be prepared for decades of resentment if their guests found out but I have a feeling she might try it anyway.

She also said they purposefully picked the location to deter RSVPs from family members that they didn't actually want to show up but were being "forced" to invite.

She got upset when I said I was planning on arriving the morning of the wedding (it isn't until early evening Saturday). She wanted me to take the day off from work on Friday so I could drive all the way down there "for fun!" And also free help with camp setup.

Bride constantly makes fun of/criticizes people behind their backs that are actually showing up to this thing for a) their choice of clothes if anyone dared suggest wearing something semi/formal to a wedding b) being worried about the location c) politely suggesting that she and her FI aren't prepared enough and offering to help.

Edited to add: On the clothes front... her gown is green with a white lace panel & she graciously told me I was "allowed" to wear green if I wanted to but then followed it up with "but you're not planning on wearing like, HEELS or anything, right?"

She may not have an officiant at ALL because her "best friend" who volunteered for the job lives multiple states away and is going through a huge life crisis at the moment. Officiant has indicated that she currently doesn't even have a place to live and to come to the wedding she would have to travel out of state, leaving her own husband behind to deal with their own stuff, and come to this thing on her own limited income. Bride says she "doesn't understand why any of that would interfere with her coming out for this wedding."

Finally: Honeyfund registry only.
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Re: Time-Bomb Weekend Wedding

  • Ok that makes the wedding we are attending next month look like it was planned by the Royal Family. Good luck!
  • edited July 2016
    Sounds like she may have received her advice from a certain thrifty bride blog we all once read. 
    image
  • JFC I look forward to the post-wedding update on this one. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • monkeysip said:
     no catering (there's an open fire pit and some picnic tables.. for a WEEKEND destination wedding with no refrigeration or electricity)
    Just to clarify: there will be NO food?  Or they're going to cook stuff on the open fire during the wedding (which is also problematic)?


    Yeah that wasn't very clear in my post--there WILL be food but the only cooking equipment they have is the open fire pit and last I heard the head count is about 45 people. The bride was talking about it like it was no big deal to feed breakfast, lunch, and dinner to 45 people for two whole days + whatever meals they're offering on Friday setup day.

    Also I have no idea about the phone signal out there but I freaking hope there's something :D I guess we'll find out!
  • What the hell does someone wear to a camping wedding? 
  • SP29SP29 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    OMG.....

    I think I would show up for the ceremony + reception, then leave when I'd had enough and head back to my hotel with electricity/plumbing/well cooked food.
  • Camping weddings seem to be popular where I live. Seeing people's pictures, they wear anything from actual camping clothing to fancy dresses. I don't like camping, I may do it for a very special friend but I wouldn't be caught dead wearing something fancy.
  • I like camping.  I'm going in a few weeks. But a big fat hell no to this mess.  


    image
  • kvrunskvruns member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    ernursej said:
    Camping weddings seem to be popular where I live. Seeing people's pictures, they wear anything from actual camping clothing to fancy dresses. I don't like camping, I may do it for a very special friend but I wouldn't be caught dead wearing something fancy.
    camping weddings are a thing??
  • A friend of a friend of mine is having a camping wedding. Last I heard, she bought a formal wedding dress so her wedding party expected to be in formals as well...weird to me, but whatever floats your boat, I guess. But they are also using a Facebook event as their only form of invitation, so. I'm not sure how it's gonna work out anyway.
  • fyrchk said:
    No words...except...maybe you'll get lucky and get to sit on hay bales! Or homemade pillows!
    Oh man, I hope they're covered in burlap!
  • ei34ei34 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    fyrchk said:
    No words...except...maybe you'll get lucky and get to sit on hay bales! Or homemade pillows!
    Oh man, I hope they're covered in burlap!
    With a lace fringe.  This is a wedding, after all.
  • kvruns said:
    ernursej said:
    Camping weddings seem to be popular where I live. Seeing people's pictures, they wear anything from actual camping clothing to fancy dresses. I don't like camping, I may do it for a very special friend but I wouldn't be caught dead wearing something fancy.
    camping weddings are a thing??
    Oh yes! I know quite a few people who've had one. Although they have been well organized, with lots of food, tons of fun, and very casual. It really only works when most people invited also enjoy camping. Most of them that I've known of have had tent camp spots, rv campspots, and cabins available so people can choose what version of "camping" they want. We even considered this for a moment for our wedding but decided against it for various reasons (time of year in particular). 
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited July 2016
    OK I have to vent about this debacle I am witnessing unfold.

    So the bride is a relative of mine and I've got a front-row seat to all of this. The wedding is coming up next month & I'm honestly wondering if it's going to fall apart before the date hits. So here's the rundown:

    Bride and her FI have been engaged for YEARS and have talked about getting married for a long time. You would think that over the course of those years they'd save up money, right? Wrong. They haven't saved a cent and are banking on doing things as cheaply as possible.
    Nothing wrong with a budget wedding.

    No paid photographer ("We were thinking everyone has smartphones nowadays anyway, our guests can take all the photos!"), no catering (there's an open fire pit and some picnic tables.. for a WEEKEND destination wedding with no refrigeration or electricity), a friend is voluntarily officiating, another friend is gifting the wedding cake, the invitations were generic freebies printed online & and contained no personal information on them (as in, mine didn't have my name OR my SO's name on the RSVP at all and the outer envelope was only addressed to me)/hardly any details about the event itself. They looked like those punch-out elementary school cardstock valentines.
    Professional photography isn't necessary.
    Invitations only need to state who, what, when and where.  DIY is fine.  R.s.v.p.s are optional.
    It is none of your business who makes the cake or how much they paid for it.
    They're holding the ceremony outdoors in the middle of a public park. They wanted it to be held at a small "historic viewpoint" at the top of a narrow trail that you have to hike 20 minutes from the parking lot to get to, with ZERO seating, in an area that cannot be reserved for private events & is a major tourist landmark in the area, on a summer weekend. They found out after they'd already sent out the invites that groups of 10 or more are not permitted at all so now they're just going to hold the ceremony down at the open recreational area.
    Are there any seats in the open recreation are?  If so, this is fine.

    Bride complained about this because "it's not as pretty" and said they were toying with the idea of having a SECRET CEREMONY up at the viewpoint the night before with just themselves, a few select friends, and the officiant before everyone showed up for their destination weekend wedding 4 hours away from civilization and plumbing. I told her to be prepared for decades of resentment if their guests found out but I have a feeling she might try it anyway.

    She also said they purposefully picked the location to deter RSVPs from family members that they didn't actually want to show up but were being "forced" to invite.

    She got upset when I said I was planning on arriving the morning of the wedding (it isn't until early evening Saturday). She wanted me to take the day off from work on Friday so I could drive all the way down there "for fun!" And also free help with camp setup.

    Bride constantly makes fun of/criticizes people behind their backs that are actually showing up to this thing for a) their choice of clothes if anyone dared suggest wearing something semi/formal to a wedding b) being worried about the location c) politely suggesting that she and her FI aren't prepared enough and offering to help.

    Edited to add: On the clothes front... her gown is green with a white lace panel & she graciously told me I was "allowed" to wear green if I wanted to but then followed it up with "but you're not planning on wearing like, HEELS or anything, right?"
    She can wear anything that she wants.  I think she was trying to give you a heads up on the area conditions.

    She may not have an officiant at ALL because her "best friend" who volunteered for the job lives multiple states away and is going through a huge life crisis at the moment. Officiant has indicated that she currently doesn't even have a place to live and to come to the wedding she would have to travel out of state, leaving her own husband behind to deal with their own stuff, and come to this thing on her own limited income. Bride says she "doesn't understand why any of that would interfere with her coming out for this wedding."

    Finally: Honeyfund registry only.  Ew.
    If you skip over the fact that the bride has loose lips and says things without thinking, most of her plans are acceptable, except for the honeymoon registry.  You don't know that she is going to do the secret ceremony.  It sounds like she is just disappointed that she can't have her location.  Lots of brides experience this.
    I am defending your relative because my sister's wedding wasn't that different.  Her wedding was held in a public park, and they had a pig roast.  It was difficult for many guests to get to the ceremony because of flooding conditions that no one could have anticipated.  She borrowed her dress from a much married friend.  The invitations were the biggest cost.  It was a great wedding.  I still remember the look on my mother's face as her heels sunk into the mud.  She had been told not to wear heels.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • CMGragain said:
    OK I have to vent about this debacle I am witnessing unfold.

    So the bride is a relative of mine and I've got a front-row seat to all of this. The wedding is coming up next month & I'm honestly wondering if it's going to fall apart before the date hits. So here's the rundown:

    Bride and her FI have been engaged for YEARS and have talked about getting married for a long time. You would think that over the course of those years they'd save up money, right? Wrong. They haven't saved a cent and are banking on doing things as cheaply as possible.
    Nothing wrong with a budget wedding.

    No paid photographer ("We were thinking everyone has smartphones nowadays anyway, our guests can take all the photos!"), no catering (there's an open fire pit and some picnic tables.. for a WEEKEND destination wedding with no refrigeration or electricity), a friend is voluntarily officiating, another friend is gifting the wedding cake, the invitations were generic freebies printed online & and contained no personal information on them (as in, mine didn't have my name OR my SO's name on the RSVP at all and the outer envelope was only addressed to me)/hardly any details about the event itself. They looked like those punch-out elementary school cardstock valentines.
    Professional photography isn't necessary.
    Invitations only need to state who, what, when and where.  DIY is fine.  R.s.v.p.s are optional.
    It is none of your business who makes the cake or how much they paid for it.
    They're holding the ceremony outdoors in the middle of a public park. They wanted it to be held at a small "historic viewpoint" at the top of a narrow trail that you have to hike 20 minutes from the parking lot to get to, with ZERO seating, in an area that cannot be reserved for private events & is a major tourist landmark in the area, on a summer weekend. They found out after they'd already sent out the invites that groups of 10 or more are not permitted at all so now they're just going to hold the ceremony down at the open recreational area.
    Are there any seats in the open recreation are?  If so, this is fine.

    Bride complained about this because "it's not as pretty" and said they were toying with the idea of having a SECRET CEREMONY up at the viewpoint the night before with just themselves, a few select friends, and the officiant before everyone showed up for their destination weekend wedding 4 hours away from civilization and plumbing. I told her to be prepared for decades of resentment if their guests found out but I have a feeling she might try it anyway.

    She also said they purposefully picked the location to deter RSVPs from family members that they didn't actually want to show up but were being "forced" to invite.

    She got upset when I said I was planning on arriving the morning of the wedding (it isn't until early evening Saturday). She wanted me to take the day off from work on Friday so I could drive all the way down there "for fun!" And also free help with camp setup.

    Bride constantly makes fun of/criticizes people behind their backs that are actually showing up to this thing for a) their choice of clothes if anyone dared suggest wearing something semi/formal to a wedding b) being worried about the location c) politely suggesting that she and her FI aren't prepared enough and offering to help.

    Edited to add: On the clothes front... her gown is green with a white lace panel & she graciously told me I was "allowed" to wear green if I wanted to but then followed it up with "but you're not planning on wearing like, HEELS or anything, right?"
    She can wear anything that she wants.  I think she was trying to give you a heads up on the area conditions.

    She may not have an officiant at ALL because her "best friend" who volunteered for the job lives multiple states away and is going through a huge life crisis at the moment. Officiant has indicated that she currently doesn't even have a place to live and to come to the wedding she would have to travel out of state, leaving her own husband behind to deal with their own stuff, and come to this thing on her own limited income. Bride says she "doesn't understand why any of that would interfere with her coming out for this wedding."

    Finally: Honeyfund registry only.  Ew.
    If you skip over the fact that the bride has loose lips and says things without thinking, most of her plans are acceptable, except for the honeymoon registry.  You don't know that she is going to do the secret ceremony.  It sounds like she is just disappointed that she can't have her location.  Lots of brides experience this.
    I am defending your relative because my sister's wedding wasn't that different.  Her wedding was held in a public park, and they had a pig roast.  It was difficult for many guests to get to the ceremony because of flooding conditions that no one could have anticipated.  She borrowed her dress from a much married friend.  The invitations were the biggest cost.  It was a great wedding.  I still remember the look on my mother's face as her heels sunk into the mud.  She had been told not to wear heels.
    I think the invitations sound like a mess. They didn't have the details of the wedding (I'm assuming by this address, time etc.) We recently received an invitation that didn't include the address for the reception (held at a different venue from the reception). We are local so NBD for us but OOT guests should have an address.
  • I think the invitations sound like a mess. They didn't have the details of the wedding (I'm assuming by this address, time etc.) We recently received an invitation that didn't include the address for the reception (held at a different venue from the reception). We are local so NBD for us but OOT guests should have an address.
    For real, when I got mine I thought it was a STD because of how little information was on it. When I saw the RSVP card included & realized it was the actual invitation (which, btw, was sent out 6 months ago with a TWO WEEK RSVP deadline on it for a wedding that isn't until the end of August) I couldn't believe it. I had crucial details that all guests should know because she had been talking to me about it during their planning process but stuff like, which campsite they had reserved or what time the ceremony started or what time they would be showing up to the group camp site, etc was nowhere on it. Literally the invite is just "Camping Weekend! Bride & Groom are getting married Here on This Day" and an RSVP card with room for you to write in one name. That's IT.
  • No I completely, absolutely understand having a budget. Definitely! But my issue with her choices is that a) she knew a wedding was going to happen at some point because they have had a very long engagement (which is also fine, they had their reasons for wanting to wait and I take no issue with that) -- and yet no savings were set aside for the wedding. Which would ALSO be fine except that she wants to have all of the bells and whistles of a full-on Pinterest wedding without spending a dime on it herself.

    She has made a lot of comments about "putting people to work" on things, and has said she does WANT photographs of the wedding, including staged portraits, but she flat out does not want to pay for a photographer if there are plenty of guests with camera phones. To me that's like, these people are your guests, you shouldn't be relying on them to work for you because you didn't feel like paying a professional to do it for you.

    I get that there's only so much that can be portrayed in an internet post, and much of this stuff is on its own fine, like if someone WANTS to do your cake, ok. That's awesome. But the way she comes off in conversations we have makes me feel so gross, like she has somehow formed this belief that everyone in attendance at her wedding OWES her these things, because Wedding. I really do hope that everything turns out great, and I hope this side of her disappears after the wedding. I just had to snark about it and get it out of my system.

    Edit: Also the clothes choice for her, I wasn't snarking on her wearing green--just thought it was weird when she calls me and says "Oh by the way you're allowed to wear green if you want, I don't mind." I kind of feel like if you're wearing an untraditional color of wedding dress, it's going to be next to impossible to telegraph that to everyone present unlike with white, which everyone knows not to wear to a wedding. I wasn't planning on wearing green anyway so the option doesn't phase me just the way she said it, and it makes me wonder how she's getting this info to all of her other guests.
    And this is the Snarky board:)  

    45 people for 2 days, no refrigeration....I'd bring some of your own non-perishable food, just in case.  I've camped plenty, and I have no idea how I'd keep that much food cold.
  • ernursej said:
    Camping weddings seem to be popular where I live. Seeing people's pictures, they wear anything from actual camping clothing to fancy dresses. I don't like camping, I may do it for a very special friend but I wouldn't be caught dead wearing something fancy.
    Wearing fancy clothes to a camping wedding just sounds so odd and unpractical to me.  But to each their own.  I guess I picture the people who would want a camping wedding would be more outdoorsy and casual type of folks anyway.
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  • Update! The wedding was this last weekend. Here are the highlights:

    > Bride & groom took "DIY" to mean "everyone else do it for us." Groom's mom & aunt were running around trying to decorate at the last minute by picking wildflowers along the side of the road, setting up refreshments, etc. B&G brought their dog with them but had no time to look after it, so they were constantly asking other people to hold the dog's leash, take the dog for walks, feed the dog, so on. They would call us over and then ask assembled guests for 'volunteers' for ice runs, food prep, cake-serving, chair setup, etc.

    > NO music, except the bride had a friend with a guitar do the processional. I hadn't thought of this as an issue until I found myself wondering why it was so eerily quiet. Everyone was talking in low tones because without the ambient background noise, everyone else could hear your conversation so it was just really, really quiet both before & after the ceremony. When asked about music at the reception, the bride was like "Oh man, we completely forgot! Well, we aren't dancers anyway."

    > There were trays of snacks (vegetable sticks with dips, cut fruit, little sandwiches) set out before the ceremony that were left out all day/night that the groom's mom kept having to move out of the sun as the day progressed. They were placed out on the picnic tables at 11am and were still there at 8pm.

    > Those snacks were the only food available until 6pm (wedding was at 3) when the b&g decided to go ahead and do the cake before dinner, since no one knew where the food was for dinner & no one had started the campfires for grilling yet.

    > Dinner was "served" roughly at 9pm and we were all dying for protein at that point so we were absolutely grateful for the entirely unseasoned grilled chicken & steak & vegetable kebabs. Like NO seasoning, not even salt. Nothing to put on them, no marinade, nothing. Just dirty char from the open fire grill.

    > Bride's parents were 20 minutes late. They didn't camp with the rest of us & stayed in town in a hotel and in spite of having all day to get ready, still managed to be completely disorganized & hold up the whole thing.

    > Bride continually asked all guests to take posed photos of her & groom. Like, interrupted conversations to ask someone to come take photos of them. She also asked a bunch of people to hike up to the scenic viewpoint and then turned around and said, "OK which spot should we stand in for photos?" not a group photo of all her friends and family together at the vista, mind you. JUST the two of them, photographed by all of us, with the sun at an angle directly in our eyes so we couldn't take very good photos anyway.



  • Aaaahhh!  The food sounds like the worst part!  Though making everyone run around to pull off THEIR wedding is the second worst.  Cracking up at "picking wildflowers on the side of the road".  Were random, roadside flowers always their "wedding vision"?  Perhaps they were, but I'd be less snarky about it if the B&G had collected them, themselves.

    Back to the food.  Nothing like veggies and fruit, warm and soggy, from sitting in the sun for hours.  For the record, I do NOT consider cake at 6PM to be "food".  That is dinner time.  I realize this might be more personal preference, but I can count on one hand the number of times I have eaten dinner past 9PM over the last year.

    If you don't mind, OP, I need a little more detail on "no one knew where the food for dinner was".  Had it been forgotten and "running out to the store" for chicken/steaks was another guest task?  Or did it eventually get tracked down?  And hopefully still refrigerated.

    I hope your wedding gift was salt and pepper shakers!


    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Even worse than I expected. Damn.
  • yikes.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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