Oh, so, that's not normal?

drunkenwitch

Just for fun. Does anyone else have something you think is perfectly normal and everyone else has the same experience and one day you find out it's just you?

My example: crying. My tears have always burned my skin. Not in a boiling oil way, but in a mildly painful burning sensation. Very mild, but still burny.  Always. I thought that was totally normal because in real life and movies and tv, people who have been crying have red faces and red eyes. I always thought "well of course, because tears burn your skin".

Then one day... I'm hanging out with BF and our good friend for dinner and a movie. I am a cryer during movies, it is known, it's my thing, we all laugh about it. So we watch a movie with some sad parts, I cry (not hysterical weeping, just quiet tears), no big deal. Then friend looks at me and gasps "are you okay? Your face and eyes are bright red!". I said "I'm fine, it was just the crying". Blank looks from friend and BF.  Me: "well you know no how tears burn your skin". More blank looks and in unison they said "WHAT?!!". 

All I could say was "oh, so, that's not normal?".

Answer: No.

I honestly thought that was normal and I was just as baffled as they were. Now it's a running joke.

Anyone else have a "so that's not normal" story?

ShesSoCold

My hips pop out of socket. They have my entire life. They can go in and out and it doesn't hurt. I was in middle school when I said something like "don't you hate when you put your weight on one hip and then it goes too far?" and my friends looked at me weird. Until then I had no idea that wasn't normal. 

Viczaesar

ShesSoCold said:

My hips pop out of socket. They have my entire life. They can go in and out and it doesn't hurt. I was in middle school when I said something like "don't you hate when you put your weight on one hip and then it goes too far?" and my friends looked at me weird. Until then I had no idea that wasn't normal. 

My hips occasionally pop out and the popping out doesn't hurt, but trying to walk on it is uncomfortable.  But my shoulders fall out of joint much more often and that hurts even less usually.  It tends to gross out people when one audibly pops out.  Recently I've had a bone in my right foot that I have to pop back into place occasionally, and if I try to walk on it while it's out it's extremely painful.

Viczaesar

Sorry, got on a tangent.  I know that's not how bodies are supposed to work!

ShesSoCold

Viczaesar said:

ShesSoCold said:

My hips pop out of socket. They have my entire life. They can go in and out and it doesn't hurt. I was in middle school when I said something like "don't you hate when you put your weight on one hip and then it goes too far?" and my friends looked at me weird. Until then I had no idea that wasn't normal. 

My hips occasionally pop out and the popping out doesn't hurt, but trying to walk on it is uncomfortable.  But my shoulders fall out of joint much more often and that hurts even less usually.  It tends to gross out people when one audibly pops out.  Recently I've had a bone in my right foot that I have to pop back into place occasionally, and if I try to walk on it while it's out it's extremely painful.

Oh wow! I hope there's no arthritis or any concerns like that! I went to physical therapy for a while on my hips but the goal was just to keep the muscles strong and prevent my hips from coming out. Sometimes when I'm lying down they'll kinda slip out without me noticing. If I sleep wrong I can definitely tell the next day and pay for it with hip pain. 

When I was a kid my shoulders would occasionally pop out but we had to go to the doctor to get them popped back in. Happened maybe a half dozen times. My doctor tried to show my mom how to pop it back in but she couldn't do it. I don't blame her. 

lc07

I have never heard of burning tears! And I'm so glad my joints don't pop out. My best friend's shoulder does that and it's super painful.

I have synesthesia where I associate letters with colors. So every word has a color too in my mind based on the first letter of each word. Until very recently I thought everyone did this. Nope! 

lc07

I'm also a "Highly Sensitive Person" and "High Sensation Seeking" which is a neurological wiring that is different than the vast majority of the population. Only about 15%-20% of the population is HSP and only 30% of those people are HSS. It's really interesting. It's made me understand so much more about why I think the way I think and why I've always felt so different from most of the people around me. It's actually been really life changing learning about it. There are self tests on the website hsperson.com if anyone's interested. I'm learning about it in therapy.

kimmiinthemitten

I don't have one as an adult, but my parents are Deaf so American Sign Language was my first language and English was second. I remember being a teeny tiny kid and realizing everyone else didn't know ASL and I thought they were so strange. 

crowsgirl15

I have a weird thing since I was a very young kid where if I move my head too fast or a certain way I get a popping, burning sensation in my head. It kind of feels like something pops and then something burning oozes out. It goes away fairly quickly, but it hurts a lot for about 30 seconds.

It doesn't happen as often as an adult...but when I was a kid, I assumed it happened to everyone. I mentioned it to my parents once, and they were obviously very confused. Doctors say it's just a thing, probably nerve related, but I thought it was normal for a long time.

justsie

I thought yogurt was painful to eat for everyone. When Greek yogurt became more popular I used to eat it daily because I loved the flavor but it was slightly more painful than other types. I asked my roommate one day how she got over her throat hurting while eating yogurt and she looked at me like I had lost my mind. After that I looked it up and realized it was probably a sign I have mild lactose intolerance. I just skip eating yogurt and have cut back on lactose products and I haven't had it happen since. 

Sherbie25

crowsgirl15 said:

I have a weird thing since I was a very young kid where if I move my head too fast or a certain way I get a popping, burning sensation in my head. It kind of feels like something pops and then something burning oozes out. It goes away fairly quickly, but it hurts a lot for about 30 seconds.

It doesn't happen as often as an adult...but when I was a kid, I assumed it happened to everyone. I mentioned it to my parents once, and they were obviously very confused. Doctors say it's just a thing, probably nerve related, but I thought it was normal for a long time.

I also had this as a kid, not so much now. Sorry to ruin your uniqueness!

bleve0821

ShesSoCold said:

My hips pop out of socket. They have my entire life. They can go in and out and it doesn't hurt. I was in middle school when I said something like "don't you hate when you put your weight on one hip and then it goes too far?" and my friends looked at me weird. Until then I had no idea that wasn't normal. 

My hips do this, too.  DH hates it.  Sometimes, I do it to mess with him when he's really peeving me.

For almost 10 years, I thought it was normal to have a headache every single day.  Like, I knew migraines (bad ones) weren't normal, and I knew that amount of suck wasn't normal or healthy, but I wasn't having bad migraines every day.  It was just headaches.

I can't believe it took me a decade to figure out I was actually having minor migraines on a daily basis, and all I needed to do was drink an extra glass and a half of water a day.  I have no idea how long that would have continued if I hadn't met DH, a fellow migraine sufferer, and hasn't said, "That's just not normal."

charlotte989875

I've never slept through the night, really ever. I wake up 4-5 times a night, I toss and turn. I've had a sleep study and I don't have apnea, I am just a terrible sleeper. When H and I first started living together I asked him if he gets up a lot during the night and he was like "no, I sleep. Then I wake up in the morning". He thought it was the strangest thing I have never slept an entire night. 

OurWildKingdom

We had a friend over for dinner last night, and she immediately noticed that we don't have a TV in our space. I explained that we watch shows and movies on the laptops, but she was still puzzled. I haven't had a TV since 2009, and I really don't miss it.

Our housemate does have a TV upstairs and we'll occasionally watch Netflix on it, but everything else is on the computer.

madamerwin

So this is kind of hard to explain, but I have something called number-form synesthesia. Numbers have set places in space in my head... Like, 1 is right in front of me, and then numbers up to ten curve up to the right, and then 11-20 do a diagonal to the left, and then 21-30 kind of curve up sharply to the left... Eventually, you get to 100, which is off in the distance, up and to the left. The higher the number, the farther up and to the left it is, but it's not on a linear plane, exactly.  When I think about a certain number, it's like I am standing on it, and I can see all the other numbers going off in each direction. Any number more than about 20 away is kind of fuzzy until I "jump" to it.

Similarly, the calendar year is laid out in a specific pattern in my head, and I view the rest of the year from the current date. It kind of looks like pickup sticks in a rough circle floating in 3 dimensions. For example, today is August 15, so when I think about December 1st, it's kind of off to my right, about 30 degrees away and slightly uphill. I have a knack for remembering people's birthdays, because in my head, I place that person on their day - so when I think of, say, my niece, I see an image of her on May 28th.

Never had any idea that most people do not see numbers as dimensional with fixed places in space, until it somehow came up in conversation with my dad. He was fascinated by it, and it turns out that whenever it comes up (usually by way of someone I know mentioning it to someone else), everyone thinks I'm crazy.

charlotte989875

madamerwin said:

So this is kind of hard to explain, but I have something called number-form synesthesia. Numbers have set places in space in my head... Like, 1 is right in front of me, and then numbers up to ten curve up to the right, and then 11-20 do a diagonal to the left, and then 21-30 kind of curve up sharply to the left... Eventually, you get to 100, which is off in the distance, up and to the left. The higher the number, the farther up and to the left it is, but it's not on a linear plane, exactly.  When I think about a certain number, it's like I am standing on it, and I can see all the other numbers going off in each direction. Any number more than about 20 away is kind of fuzzy until I "jump" to it.

Similarly, the calendar year is laid out in a specific pattern in my head, and I view the rest of the year from the current date. It kind of looks like pickup sticks in a rough circle floating in 3 dimensions. For example, today is August 15, so when I think about December 1st, it's kind of off to my right, about 30 degrees away and slightly uphill. I have a knack for remembering people's birthdays, because in my head, I place that person on their day - so when I think of, say, my niece, I see an image of her on May 28th.

Never had any idea that most people do not see numbers as dimensional with fixed places in space, until it somehow came up in conversation with my dad. He was fascinated by it, and it turns out that whenever it comes up (usually by way of someone I know mentioning it to someone else), everyone thinks I'm crazy.

That's so cool. I've never heard of anyone thinking of numbers like that (and I do math most work days); did you find that math was easier for you?

madamerwin

charlotte989875 said:

madamerwin said:

So this is kind of hard to explain, but I have something called number-form synesthesia. Numbers have set places in space in my head... Like, 1 is right in front of me, and then numbers up to ten curve up to the right, and then 11-20 do a diagonal to the left, and then 21-30 kind of curve up sharply to the left... Eventually, you get to 100, which is off in the distance, up and to the left. The higher the number, the farther up and to the left it is, but it's not on a linear plane, exactly.  When I think about a certain number, it's like I am standing on it, and I can see all the other numbers going off in each direction. Any number more than about 20 away is kind of fuzzy until I "jump" to it.

Similarly, the calendar year is laid out in a specific pattern in my head, and I view the rest of the year from the current date. It kind of looks like pickup sticks in a rough circle floating in 3 dimensions. For example, today is August 15, so when I think about December 1st, it's kind of off to my right, about 30 degrees away and slightly uphill. I have a knack for remembering people's birthdays, because in my head, I place that person on their day - so when I think of, say, my niece, I see an image of her on May 28th.

Never had any idea that most people do not see numbers as dimensional with fixed places in space, until it somehow came up in conversation with my dad. He was fascinated by it, and it turns out that whenever it comes up (usually by way of someone I know mentioning it to someone else), everyone thinks I'm crazy.

That's so cool. I've never heard of anyone thinking of numbers like that (and I do math most work days); did you find that math was easier for you?

Some math, yes... Algebra in particular, since I can add/subtract/divide/multiply large numbers by "looking" at them in my head. I went through calculus in high school and did well in it, but I credit my teachers for that more than my weird brain. I remember number sequences - like phone numbers - very easily as well.

The calendar thing is the most useful, though (I think that may actually be called spatial sequence synesthesia, though to me, they seem to be the same principle). I literally remember everyone's birthdays, if I have been told once, since that person then "occupies" that date in my head. Also don't forget appointments easily. If you were to look at my calendar from above, it's laid out like 12 sticks - one for each month. April is near the top, November is near the bottom. Some months are roughly parallel with the first at the bottom and the last day at the top (like September - January), but then February is off at a 45 degree angle, and March is stacked on top (so March 1st is directly above February 28/29). But usually I "view" it from wherever I am in the year, and everything is on a horizontal plane like I'm on the edge of a plate. But also, none of the "sticks" are completely straight, and they are not all on the same horizontal plane. Some months appear higher up than others.

Days of the week are also lined up in a circle. Wednesday occupies the most space, followed by Saturday and Sunday. So, if I am only thinking of weekdays (not dates), I see them as a circle with seven unevenly-sized squares. If I am thinking of dates, it's how I described above, with the calendar. Somehow I can reconcile the days and the dates into one form, but that is just too hard to explain.

MissKittyDanger

madamerwin said:

So this is kind of hard to explain, but I have something called number-form synesthesia. Numbers have set places in space in my head... Like, 1 is right in front of me, and then numbers up to ten curve up to the right, and then 11-20 do a diagonal to the left, and then 21-30 kind of curve up sharply to the left... Eventually, you get to 100, which is off in the distance, up and to the left. The higher the number, the farther up and to the left it is, but it's not on a linear plane, exactly.  When I think about a certain number, it's like I am standing on it, and I can see all the other numbers going off in each direction. Any number more than about 20 away is kind of fuzzy until I "jump" to it.

Similarly, the calendar year is laid out in a specific pattern in my head, and I view the rest of the year from the current date. It kind of looks like pickup sticks in a rough circle floating in 3 dimensions. For example, today is August 15, so when I think about December 1st, it's kind of off to my right, about 30 degrees away and slightly uphill. I have a knack for remembering people's birthdays, because in my head, I place that person on their day - so when I think of, say, my niece, I see an image of her on May 28th.

Never had any idea that most people do not see numbers as dimensional with fixed places in space, until it somehow came up in conversation with my dad. He was fascinated by it, and it turns out that whenever it comes up (usually by way of someone I know mentioning it to someone else), everyone thinks I'm crazy.

I am convinced my dad had something similar. He would look at blueprints and could see exactly how it should be and could narrow down the issue.

He also was very good with numbers and you could watch him do math in his head when asked a question ... so maybe he had same thing.

Still very cool to hear someone explain it!

MissKittyDanger

The way I remember things is crazy. I've always had a good memory, but with my current job my coworkers would start to explain a file {ex: "The person who drove Year/Car?"} and I would pipe up with "oh FirstName ?" or "LastName" ? Sometimes I can do both. I somehow memorize things in the file.

kvruns

@madamerwin if you set an appointment for way in advance such as a dental cleaning 6 months out, would you remember it/picture it that far in advance or do you still have to write it down/put it on a calendar like most others would?

short+sassy

@Ic07 and @madamerwin, thanks for explaining about synesthesia, that's fascinating!

It made me think about my relationship with words.  I don't know if this is normal or not, but I often see words written out in my mind as I am talking and/or if someone is talking to me.  Never more than one or two words at a time and often just a key word.  It looks just like it would in a book, except it is a picture in my mind.  It doesn't happen all the time but, it always happens if I am trying to spell something or if I am really focusing/worried about something.

I once had a coworker who sat near me that would always ask me how to spell things and joked I was better than using the MS Word spellcheck.  She asked me once why I was such a good speller and I told her I just spelled out the picture of the word that appeared in my mind.  Apparently that does not happen to her and she asked me questions about it.  Anecdotal, for sure, but it's just not something that comes up in the normal course of conversation so I don't know if my "word pictures" are unusual or not.

OurWildKingdom

MissKittyDanger said:

The way I remember things is crazy. I've always had a good memory, but with my current job my coworkers would start to explain a file {ex: "The person who drove Year/Car?"} and I would pipe up with "oh FirstName ?" or "LastName" ? Sometimes I can do both. I somehow memorize things in the file.

Me too! I also have a pretty good memory for putting names and faces together. Came in handy when I was substitute teaching!

kvruns

I don't know if this is normal or abnormal, but how the heck do you "count sheep"? I've seriously never understood it because a sheep has never once run through my mind when I'm trying to sleep. I don't visualize anything when I'm trying to sleep. The only time I "see" anything when my eyes are closed are if I'm dreaming. 

short+sassy

On the other side of the coin, as a little kid (3-6 years), I wondered why what was "normal" for everyone else was not normal for me.  Specifically with weather.

I lived in So. CA and waited every year for the birds to "fly South for the winter".  And for the leaves to turn all the pretty shades like they do in my books.  I waited for snow that never came.  All this stuff happened in my books and cartoons, but I never saw any of it.  At the time, it was confusing, lol. 

madamerwin

kvruns said:

@madamerwin if you set an appointment for way in advance such as a dental cleaning 6 months out, would you remember it/picture it that far in advance or do you still have to write it down/put it on a calendar like most others would?

Only if I make a mental note of it right when I schedule it. For example, I had a dentist appointment in March, at which time I scheduled another one for September. At the time, I did not put any thought into it, so I didn't actually remember it until I found the appointment reminder card last month (it's on September 14th, for the record). Basically, I have to make a conscious effort to commit something to memory in order for it to "stick" (which is what I do intentionally with birthdays, anniversaries, etc.). But once I do make that effort, it's there. So once I found that reminder card, the appointment is now sitting on that date, but I don't always take the time or energy to try to remember things that are not recurring, like birthdays or other important dates that happen each year.

MissKittyDanger

OurWildKingdom said:

MissKittyDanger said:

The way I remember things is crazy. I've always had a good memory, but with my current job my coworkers would start to explain a file {ex: "The person who drove Year/Car?"} and I would pipe up with "oh FirstName ?" or "LastName" ? Sometimes I can do both. I somehow memorize things in the file.

Me too! I also have a pretty good memory for putting names and faces together. Came in handy when I was substitute teaching!

Definitely! When clients come into our office and I recognize them, you can tell it makes them feel good

Odd question, did you play the 'memory game' when you were a kid?
It's a game you set up a bunch of things in a row and you have the kid tell you what's missing or what's moved. Apparently I was really good as a kid lol

lyndausvi

I thought pencil/pen marks on the side of your writing hand was normal.  

Then I found out it's only normal for us lefties. 

OurWildKingdom

MissKittyDanger said:

OurWildKingdom said:

MissKittyDanger said:

The way I remember things is crazy. I've always had a good memory, but with my current job my coworkers would start to explain a file {ex: "The person who drove Year/Car?"} and I would pipe up with "oh FirstName ?" or "LastName" ? Sometimes I can do both. I somehow memorize things in the file.

Me too! I also have a pretty good memory for putting names and faces together. Came in handy when I was substitute teaching!

Definitely! When clients come into our office and I recognize them, you can tell it makes them feel good

Odd question, did you play the 'memory game' when you were a kid?
It's a game you set up a bunch of things in a row and you have the kid tell you what's missing or what's moved. Apparently I was really good as a kid lol

I loved that game!

MissKittyDanger

short+sassy said:

On the other side of the coin, as a little kid (3-6 years), I wondered why what was "normal" for everyone else was not normal for me.  Specifically with weather.

I lived in So. CA and waited every year for the birds to "fly South for the winter".  And for the leaves to turn all the pretty shades like they do in my books.  I waited for snow that never came.  All this stuff happened in my books and cartoons, but I never saw any of it.  At the time, it was confusing, lol. 

I'm oddly envious. I live in Canada, and there are parts that get more snow than others.
Every fall I see birds leave and I yell "DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE US!! IT'S TOO EARLY!"

Then we get windchill of -40 so don't wish for snow. Lol

thisismynickname2

kvruns said:

I don't know if this is normal or abnormal, but how the heck do you "count sheep"? I've seriously never understood it because a sheep has never once run through my mind when I'm trying to sleep. I don't visualize anything when I'm trying to sleep. The only time I "see" anything when my eyes are closed are if I'm dreaming. 

Oh, I'm such a daydreamer, I'm always visualizing something in my mind. Heck, I can visualize something with my eyes open. Visualizing something while trying to sleep is the only way I can get to sleep, otherwise I'll ruminate on things that bothered me at work or whatever. So I have to make up things in my head to lull myself to sleep.

So "counting sheep"- picture the Serta sheep (because they're cute!) jumping over something over and over and over and just count each time it jumps. That's basically counting sheep. 

Like this:

SaintPaulGal

I can't visualize things the way normal people can.  The whole "close your eyes and call up an image" thing is completely foreign to me.  

It's not that I can't remember visual things; I actually have a very good memory for how things appear.  But it is all stored in my head in words instead of as pictures, almost like my memory is giving instructions to a sketch artist.  ("Okay, so to the left of the office is an elevator *mentally draws elevator* and directly to the right of that is an old leather tufted couch *outlines couch*.)  Which I find particularly strange/amusing because I am complete shit at actual drawing.