Registering and Gifts

When can we use gifts?

Our wedding is in a month, and we've had a few gifts sent to our house from guests who either aren't coming or (I assume) don't want to haul them to the venue (which I appreciate because then we don't have to transport them back!). Is it inappropriate to start using them now, or should we wait until after the wedding? It's not a big deal either way, but it would be nice to put things away and start using them instead of leaving boxes in the kitchen.

(I didn't have a shower, so this is the first time we've gotten any wedding gifts)

Re: When can we use gifts?

  • You need to leave them boxed until after the wedding in case, for whatever reason, the wedding doesn't take place and you need to return the gifts to the givers. Do, however, send those thank-you notes right now.
    southernbelle0915ernursejInLoveInQueens
  • I could be wrong, but I thought you could start using gifts after thank you notes are sent out. That's what we have done with gifts we have received early. 
  • I could be wrong, but I thought you could start using gifts after thank you notes are sent out. That's what we have done with gifts we have received early. 
    Technically if the wedding were to be called off for any reason you'd need to return the gifts.   If they're used then you would have to reimburse the giver for the gift.

    It's unlikely but on occasion it happens where someone logs on and says that late in the game one or both halves of the couple had a change of heart and the wedding didn't happen.  


    charlotte989875
  • Alright, it seems like we'll wait then! I've been sending out thank you's within a day or two of receiving a gift, but we can live with keeping things in the box for a couple more weeks. I don't think either of us will change our minds, but there is still the chance something awful could happen and prevent us actually getting married.
    charlotte989875
  • Good to know! FYI the only gifts that we have received were a few at our engagement party nearly a year ago. My mom said it was okay to go ahead and use them, but I guess she didn't know all the etiquette. I'll wait on any other gifts we start getting till after the wedding! It is true that you never know what could happen! 
  • geebee908 said:
    You need to leave them boxed until after the wedding in case, for whatever reason, the wedding doesn't take place and you need to return the gifts to the givers. Do, however, send those thank-you notes right now.
    This exactly.
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  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs
    5000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    member
    Good to know! FYI the only gifts that we have received were a few at our engagement party nearly a year ago. My mom said it was okay to go ahead and use them, but I guess she didn't know all the etiquette. I'll wait on any other gifts we start getting till after the wedding! It is true that you never know what could happen! 
    Depending on what they were, I think there are exceptions to the rule.  My daughter did not really have an engagement party, but her MIL purchased her a frame to be used to host an engagement photo, as well as some wedding planning books.  Obviously those were meant to be used immediately.  Gifts of wine and chocolates I think also are meant to be enjoyed immediately.
    ILoveBeachMusiccharlotte989875ahoyweddingInLoveInQueens
  • MobKaz said:
    Good to know! FYI the only gifts that we have received were a few at our engagement party nearly a year ago. My mom said it was okay to go ahead and use them, but I guess she didn't know all the etiquette. I'll wait on any other gifts we start getting till after the wedding! It is true that you never know what could happen! 
    Depending on what they were, I think there are exceptions to the rule.  My daughter did not really have an engagement party, but her MIL purchased her a frame to be used to host an engagement photo, as well as some wedding planning books.  Obviously those were meant to be used immediately.  Gifts of wine and chocolates I think also are meant to be enjoyed immediately.
    Oh yeah, I wouldn't wait to enjoy wine OR chocolates! We're getting things like dishes, serving bowls, etc. 
    Heffalumpsparklepants41
  • I think you should technically wait until after the wedding.  My brother and his FI broke up after the shower but before the wedding.  He didn't return the linens I had given them, because they had already used them, and he kept them in the split.  If it were anyone in the world other than my little brother, I would side eye the hell out of it and think it was tacky and rude.
    charlotte989875
  • The only gifts we received prior to the wedding were of a monetary nature and they generally came in with declines to attend.  We deposited them but in a savings account that we never touch and only moved them over to our wedding account (which became our household account) after the wedding.  It felt weird to me to use money that was sent as a wedding gift to buy things for the wedding!
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