What's the easiest way to give dear ol' auntie the boot?

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,
Aunt “Winifred” came to live with my mother (her sister) and my father under a false pretense. She pleaded poverty and family estrangement, neither of which ended up being true, and now she’s living with our parents without contributing to the household in any real way. She has driven a wedge between my mother and father (Mom acknowledges that this situation isn’t great, but she can’t bring herself to tell Winifred to find somewhere else to live), and it’s taken a toll on all of us, as she drifts malevolently through the house, saying things like: “I wish your father liked me, but I guess I’m too much of a burden.”

We’re doing what we can to help relocate her, but in the meantime my mother has had some serious health issues. We are all preparing for the inevitable. My question is this: Can we evict Aunt Winnie when my mother dies? She can manage her own affairs (unlike my 70-year-old parents) but enjoys being taken care of. Is this something we need to address legally?

—Can We Evict Her?

banana468

Yes.   Yes you address it legally.   

And you address mom's finances legally first.  

charlotte989875

Yes to all of the above. Although if it's driving a wedge between Mom and Dad I would address it now. If your Mom is nearing the end does she and your father really want to spending that remaining time together with this issue unresolved? Talk to a lawyer, now. 

MissKittyDanger

I would try asking first, but I feel she won't go easily.

short+sassy

mrsconn23 said:

Dear Prudence,
Aunt “Winifred” came to live with my mother (her sister) and my father under a false pretense. She pleaded poverty and family estrangement, neither of which ended up being true, and now she’s living with our parents without contributing to the household in any real way. She has driven a wedge between my mother and father (Mom acknowledges that this situation isn’t great, but she can’t bring herself to tell Winifred to find somewhere else to live), and it’s taken a toll on all of us, as she drifts malevolently through the house, saying things like: “I wish your father liked me, but I guess I’m too much of a burden.”

We’re doing what we can to help relocate her, but in the meantime my mother has had some serious health issues. We are all preparing for the inevitable. My question is this: Can we evict Aunt Winnie when my mother dies? She can manage her own affairs (unlike my 70-year-old parents) but enjoys being taken care of. Is this something we need to address legally?

—Can We Evict Her?

My response, "Well, yes.  You are a burden.  We were happy to help when you needed us, but it is time to plan your move out."

Obviously, the best solution is to work with Aunt Winifred on getting her out of that house and into other accommodations.  Evicting her would be the worst case scenario.  It could be done, but you all might surprised how difficult that can be, especially in some counties/states.

This was years ago, but we had a family friend who allowed a single mother from his church to live for free in a house he was renovating.  Totally out of the goodness of his heart.  Because she was down on her luck and had nowhere to go.

Once the renovation was completed and he was ready to sell the house (he'd been flipping it), she refused to leave.  The fact that she wasn't a "tenant"...just like Aunt Winifred..., ie paying a monthly rent, actually made it substantially more difficult for him to evict her.  It took him over 6 months and many trips to the court house before he finally got an eviction order.  Granted, this was in CA, an extremely UN-friendly landlord state.  But that's what can happen.  Ironically, if he'd just charged $1/month in rent, then they would have fallen in typical landlord/tenant laws and he probably would have cut that eviction time in half.

levioosa

short+sassy said:

mrsconn23 said:

Dear Prudence,
Aunt “Winifred” came to live with my mother (her sister) and my father under a false pretense. She pleaded poverty and family estrangement, neither of which ended up being true, and now she’s living with our parents without contributing to the household in any real way. She has driven a wedge between my mother and father (Mom acknowledges that this situation isn’t great, but she can’t bring herself to tell Winifred to find somewhere else to live), and it’s taken a toll on all of us, as she drifts malevolently through the house, saying things like: “I wish your father liked me, but I guess I’m too much of a burden.”

We’re doing what we can to help relocate her, but in the meantime my mother has had some serious health issues. We are all preparing for the inevitable. My question is this: Can we evict Aunt Winnie when my mother dies? She can manage her own affairs (unlike my 70-year-old parents) but enjoys being taken care of. Is this something we need to address legally?

—Can We Evict Her?

My response, "Well, yes.  You are a burden.  We were happy to help when you needed us, but it is time to plan your move out."

Obviously, the best solution is to work with Aunt Winifred on getting her out of that house and into other accommodations.  Evicting her would be the worst case scenario.  It could be done, but you all might surprised how difficult that can be, especially in some counties/states.

This was years ago, but we had a family friend who allowed a single mother from his church to live for free in a house he was renovating.  Totally out of the goodness of his heart.  Because she was down on her luck and had nowhere to go.

Once the renovation was completed and he was ready to sell the house (he'd been flipping it), she refused to leave.  The fact that she wasn't a "tenant"...just like Aunt Winifred..., ie paying a monthly rent, actually made it substantially more difficult for him to evict her.  It took him over 6 months and many trips to the court house before he finally got an eviction order.  Granted, this was in CA, an extremely UN-friendly landlord state.  But that's what can happen.  Ironically, if he'd just charged $1/month in rent, then they would have fallen in typical landlord/tenant laws and he probably would have cut that eviction time in half.

CA is crazy with their tenant protection laws.  I've known people who have stayed without paying rent for up to two years, because that's how long it took legally to get them out.  

InLoveInQueens

At my job I sometimes we deal with evictions and it is freaking hard to get someone out. Sometimes just the notice scares the tenant into paying or leaving, but sometimes they're professional squatters and stay for 6 months to a year before they move onto the next "victim"/landlord. OP better follow the letter of the law, though, because nothing screws up a landlord's case better than changing the locks/turning off utilites/the like.

short+sassy

levioosa said:

short+sassy said:

mrsconn23 said:

Dear Prudence,
Aunt “Winifred” came to live with my mother (her sister) and my father under a false pretense. She pleaded poverty and family estrangement, neither of which ended up being true, and now she’s living with our parents without contributing to the household in any real way. She has driven a wedge between my mother and father (Mom acknowledges that this situation isn’t great, but she can’t bring herself to tell Winifred to find somewhere else to live), and it’s taken a toll on all of us, as she drifts malevolently through the house, saying things like: “I wish your father liked me, but I guess I’m too much of a burden.”

We’re doing what we can to help relocate her, but in the meantime my mother has had some serious health issues. We are all preparing for the inevitable. My question is this: Can we evict Aunt Winnie when my mother dies? She can manage her own affairs (unlike my 70-year-old parents) but enjoys being taken care of. Is this something we need to address legally?

—Can We Evict Her?

My response, "Well, yes.  You are a burden.  We were happy to help when you needed us, but it is time to plan your move out."

Obviously, the best solution is to work with Aunt Winifred on getting her out of that house and into other accommodations.  Evicting her would be the worst case scenario.  It could be done, but you all might surprised how difficult that can be, especially in some counties/states.

This was years ago, but we had a family friend who allowed a single mother from his church to live for free in a house he was renovating.  Totally out of the goodness of his heart.  Because she was down on her luck and had nowhere to go.

Once the renovation was completed and he was ready to sell the house (he'd been flipping it), she refused to leave.  The fact that she wasn't a "tenant"...just like Aunt Winifred..., ie paying a monthly rent, actually made it substantially more difficult for him to evict her.  It took him over 6 months and many trips to the court house before he finally got an eviction order.  Granted, this was in CA, an extremely UN-friendly landlord state.  But that's what can happen.  Ironically, if he'd just charged $1/month in rent, then they would have fallen in typical landlord/tenant laws and he probably would have cut that eviction time in half.

CA is crazy with their tenant protection laws.  I've known people who have stayed without paying rent for up to two years, because that's how long it took legally to get them out.  

CA and NYC are the WORST for landlords.  From my real estate investing forum, I've picked up that an eviction takes about 3-4 months in CA.  But that's if you've hired an attorney and/or have gone through the process a few times.  And you have deadbeat, but otherwise normal tenants.  "Professional tenants", that's the term in the biz, can use a variety of delaying tactics to really lengthen that.

Luckily for me, Louisiana is a very landlord-friendly state.  I've never gone through one, but evictions take about 2-3 weeks on average.

There was a super crazy story on my forum where a guy bought a plot of land that he was going to build a 4-plex on.  There was a dilapidated shed on the property.  He didn't think anything of it.  But as it turns out, someone was living/squatting there.  At first, he didn't think it was any big deal.  Poor guy was so wrong.  It took him 2.5 years and dozens of court appearances* to get permission from the court to tear the shed down, because it was this vagrant's "domicile".  At one point, he even tried giving the guy $5K grand to just drop it and leave.  Nope.  The guy wouldn't take it.  When they finally tore the shed down, there were very few personal items, as one would expect.  But there were one or two fat law books.  REAL law books.  Like an attorney would have.  Both on the subject of Landlord/Tenant law in CA.

*I just wanted to add the poster wasn't usually losing the court cases, but the squatter would ask for multiple continuances.  Until a judge finally said "no more" and would rule against him.  Then the guy would file another case with another reason why he didn't have to leave.  And the process would start over again.