He's just not that into you.
Last summer, I met John during an internship. We quickly became close and developed a friends-with-benefits relationship about three months in. When the internship ended, we visited each other (he lives about an hour’s flight away), and just as I realized that I was falling for him, he broke things off. When I asked why, he mumbled something about “not really connecting on a deeper level.” This was both surprising and hurtful: I thought we were quite close, and intellectually and sexually compatible. I fell for him in the first place because I thought we were connecting on a deep level. I’d made it clear from the start I wanted to keep things casual, so I know commitment and/or being long distance weren’t an issue, so he must have genuinely thought there was something wrong with our connection. We'll be living in the same city starting next autumn, and I'm not sure what to do—I'd love to reconnect with him, but not if we have diametrically opposed views on our “relationship.” Help!
—The One That Got Away