Invites and Paper

What do you think about my RSVP?

Hello, I am curious to know what others think about my RSVP rough-draft. Does the wording seem right? I know it isn't traditional, but I wanted guests to know what style of food it is and that it is buffet-style because I would appreciate knowing ahead of time if I was a guest. We will have a cash bar because we don't drink alcohol and we honestly didn't want any at our wedding at all, but we think that people may appreciate having the option if they absolutely must. Thanks so much for your opinions!!
rsvp.png 105.9K

Re: What do you think about my RSVP?

  • adk19adk19
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    member


    Hello, I am curious to know what others think about my RSVP rough-draft. Does the wording seem right? I know it isn't traditional, but I wanted guests to know what style of food it is and that it is buffet-style because I would appreciate knowing ahead of time if I was a guest. We will have a cash bar because we don't drink alcohol and we honestly didn't want any at our wedding at all, but we think that people may appreciate having the option if they absolutely must. Thanks so much for your opinions!!


    I agree with the PP.  What if I secretly don't like you and am "Joyfully Declining" or "Sadly Accepting".  Don't tell me how to feel.

    Also, please don't have a cash bar.  You don't have to offer alcohol, but you have to pay for everything you offer.  Would you invite people to your house for dinner, serve them lemonade, then charge them $5 if they asked for a glass of wine?  If they ask for wine, THEY'RE the ones being rude.
    CMGragainSTARMOON44short+sassy
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    member
    I agree with PPs. Don't have "joyfully" or "sadly". Also no cash bar. Either serve alcohol or don't, but don't have your guests pay for their drinks.
    CMGragainInLoveInQueensSTARMOON44
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs
    5000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    member

    adk19 said:





    Hello, I am curious to know what others think about my RSVP rough-draft. Does the wording seem right? I know it isn't traditional, but I wanted guests to know what style of food it is and that it is buffet-style because I would appreciate knowing ahead of time if I was a guest. We will have a cash bar because we don't drink alcohol and we honestly didn't want any at our wedding at all, but we think that people may appreciate having the option if they absolutely must. Thanks so much for your opinions!!




    I agree with the PP.  What if I secretly don't like you and am "Joyfully Declining" or "Sadly Accepting".  Don't tell me how to feel.

    Also, please don't have a cash bar.  You don't have to offer alcohol, but you have to pay for everything you offer.  Would you invite people to your house for dinner, serve them lemonade, then charge them $5 if they asked for a glass of wine?  If they ask for wine, THEY'RE the ones being rude.


    Additionally, the lines where guests indicate the names of those attending has the potential to allow added names not on invitation. 

    Please do not indicate a cash bar, nor offer one.
    CMGragain
  • I agree with everything PPs have said - drop the "joyfully" and "sadly" and lose the cash bar. 

    I love the floral design at the top.

    What's a New Mexican buffet?
    CMGragainInLoveInQueensSTARMOON44

  • MobKaz said:



    adk19 said:








    Hello, I am curious to know what others think about my RSVP rough-draft. Does the wording seem right? I know it isn't traditional, but I wanted guests to know what style of food it is and that it is buffet-style because I would appreciate knowing ahead of time if I was a guest. We will have a cash bar because we don't drink alcohol and we honestly didn't want any at our wedding at all, but we think that people may appreciate having the option if they absolutely must. Thanks so much for your opinions!!






    I agree with the PP.  What if I secretly don't like you and am "Joyfully Declining" or "Sadly Accepting".  Don't tell me how to feel.

    Also, please don't have a cash bar.  You don't have to offer alcohol, but you have to pay for everything you offer.  Would you invite people to your house for dinner, serve them lemonade, then charge them $5 if they asked for a glass of wine?  If they ask for wine, THEY'RE the ones being rude.




    Additionally, the lines where guests indicate the names of those attending has the potential to allow added names not on invitation. 

    Please do not indicate a cash bar, nor offer one.


    Actually, I'd keep the names. I had guests write the number of guests attending. If anyone had added an extra, I would have called them up and clarified the invitation. There was some confusion when one of my cousins wrote 1 guest attending, meaning her boyfriend (who I invited by name). This was the first wedding she'd been to and she thought she wasn't counted as a guest because she's family. 

    Having the names written out would have been helpful to me.
    CMGragainInLoveInQueens
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    Your R.S.V.P. if for your guests to respond to your invitation.  It is not for describing the food and drink you are providing.  I must say that I do find the information about the cash bar helpful, though.  It is so rude, it would make my decision to decline your invitation easy.  Cash bars are inexcusably rude!
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    adk19STARMOON44
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    member
    Agree with PPs.  Take out the "joyfully" and "sadly."  And remove the cash bar and descriptors of the food. If absolutely necessary you can list the buffet on your website (what is New Mexican, by the way?).  You don't have a responsibility to provide alcohol, but you do have a responsibility to pay for everything at the reception.  It is not rude of you to have a dry wedding, but it is rude of you to expect guests to pay for their own hosting.  If they get upset at a dry wedding, that makes THEM the rude ones, but you will still be within etiquette.  I prefer alcohol at weddings, but I am also an adult, and when I go to a dry wedding I accept it and have a great time regardless. It is also perfectly acceptable to host wine and beer only (not full bar).  But full bar, limited bar, or dry wedding, you need to be responsible for the cost. 

    The flower decoration at the top is very pretty. 


    image
  • We put 
    Will be present
    and
    Regretfully unable to attend.

    Kinda standard - but I guess I wonder if what you wrote it ok? I'd be interested to know why people don't like the 'sadly' and 'joyfully'- the sadly isn't that far from regretfully.

    I also think it's important to have a place for names- we didn't have one and I've now received back some rsvp's and I have no idea who they're from! grr

    I'd also remind you to put you website info somewhere - I've just had my friend ask if we're not using it anymore because we forgot to put in on our paper invites!! so annoying. 

    Learn from my mistakes

    PS- bo to the cash bar. They suck.
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    edited May 29




    We put 
    Will be present
    and
    Regretfully unable to attend.

    Kinda standard - but I guess I wonder if what you wrote it ok? I'd be interested to know why people don't like the 'sadly' and 'joyfully'- the sadly isn't that far from regretfully.

    I also think it's important to have a place for names- we didn't have one and I've now received back some rsvp's and I have no idea who they're from! grr

    I'd also remind you to put you website info somewhere - I've just had my friend ask if we're not using it anymore because we forgot to put in on our paper invites!! so annoying. 

    Learn from my mistakes

    PS- bo to the cash bar. They suck.




    This is not at all standard, at least in the USA.  Standard is this:

    Accepts
    Declines (or, Unable to attend)

    The idea is that you do not assume the invitees feelings and put word in their mouth.  No "regretfully".  Personally, I am old school, and I write my own responses to invitations.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • adk19adk19
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    member


    I wouldn't be sad to decline an invite to a reception with a cash bar. 


    Exactly.  This is why "regretfully" or "sadly" is a bad idea.
  • The more you know. 

    I guess I've just always seen that so that's what we did.
    I think also that I'm not so shocked or affected by wording like that. 
    knottiec9d9a8992a69c629
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