Attire and Accessories

Need help with bridesmaid dress colors AND my undergarments

Hello ladies, I need some help with a couple things...

1. My wedding dress is silk crepe, form fitting, and not at all forgiving, even though I'm fairly slim. There is no tulle or anything like that and only one under-layer. I plan on toning up for the wedding and have been working out regularly, but I still would like to wear some sort of shapewear because many of us have those lady lumps...

I purchased an awesome pair of long shorts by Spanx but even with the "seamless" edge, you can see the line of where they end on my thigh when I have the dress on. I have been trying to find longer shorts, either the kind that go right to the knee or just under it, but all the ones I find do not have enough control. Most are like pantyhose, which won't cut it. I also can't have a high waist on them because my dress is backless.

Don't quote me on this, but I believe these are the ones I purchased... 

https://www.amazon.com/SPANX-OnCore-Control-Mid-Thigh-Shaper/dp/B00QGJ25ZC/ref=sr_1_1?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1502985840&sr=1-1&nodeID=7141123011&psd=1&keywords=spanx+oncore

Anyone know of a better pair that would work for me? Longer leg and not super high waist (can't be the kind that go up to the boobs). 

2. I would really like my wedding colors to be "lilac gray" and silver, however, I'm having a REALLY hard time finding lilac gray dresses. See the pic for the color I'm talking about... My idea was to have 2 or 3 different color dresses for the girls, all with different styles but all long. The colors that I have seen so far are definitely not lilac gray. I've tried Azazie's Dusk but it has a lot more mauve in it. David's Bridal doesn't have anything even close. I just ordered a swatch for the Dusty Lilac from Weddington Way but am worried it don't be right either. (Just keeping my fingers crossed for now.) I also am very aware of the cost of most bridesmaid dresses and don't want my girls spending a fortune. I also don't want to order from a website that may not be reliable or good quality. Does anyone have any advice for this dilemma? 

lilac gray wedding colors ideas 2016 and spring bridesmaid dresses ideas 2016

Re: Need help with bridesmaid dress colors AND my undergarments

  • When you asked your BMs for the budgets, what was the lowest one? That will help me look for dresses for you.
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    InLoveInQueens
  • Is lilac gray even a color? Lilac and gray are both separate colors. Maybe just pick one of them?
    sparklepants41
  • edited August 17
    Ideally, I would like the dresses to cost less than $150. Azazie was attractive for that reason. Many of their options are $119 and don't need to be altered since they are custom made. 

    Lilac gray is a color. It was the spring 2016 Pantone color. And I added a picture of it. It might be called other things elsewhere but that's the general description of the color. It's a lilac with grey undertones in it...
  • edited August 17
    southernbelle, I tried those first ones and they don't have enough control. That second pair might work, I'll check reviews. Thanks!
  • flantasticflantastic The Midwest
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    Ideally, I would like the dresses to cost less than $150. Azazie was attractive for that reason. Many of their options are $119 and don't need to be altered since they are custom made. 

    Lilac gray is a color. It was the spring 2016 Pantone color. And I added a picture of it. It might be called other things elsewhere but that's the general description of the color. It's a lilac with grey undertones in it...
    Great for you, but there's a reason why she didn't ask what price point you were looking at. What was the lowest of the budgets your BMs gave when you asked each of them individually and privately? Because while $150 is often generally reasonable for a BM dress, it's still not something you can just ask of people - you need to hear from them what they're comfortable spending before you settle on anything.

    Anniversary

    ahoyweddingMesmrEwe
  • CMGragainCMGragain
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    edited August 17
    I really think you are going the wrong way in seeking a specific shade of color.  Fashionable colors change every season.  One season's blue will not match the next season's blue.  Why are you so focused on a specific shade of color?  No one but you will care.

    I think you should choose a general color, like light grey, and let your ladies find a dress in that color range.  Matchy-matchy bridesmaids are becoming less and less a done thing.
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    InLoveInQueensSTARMOON44eileenrob
  • Underwear-wise, when I'm wearing something clingy and don't want my underwear to show, I wear Victoria's Secret nude seamless thongs. I am willing to bet the 'lumps' you think you have do not show through your dress like you think they do. Any kind of shapewear is going to show lines through a thin, fitted dress.
    image
    STARMOON44ahoywedding
  • In terms of shape wear/underwear have you tried a slip?
  • Ladies, I know I'm hopelessly old-fashioned, but when I went shopping for my wedding dress, I looked for a dress that flattered my body, not exposed my "lady lumps".
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Why is there so much bride shaming going on? Maybe some of you ladies should keep your opinions to yourselves if you're just going to judge. I asked a simple question and much of what I'm getting in response is an attitude. Not sure why brides continue to post on here if these are the responses they get. Not at all helpful... 

    CMGragain - The dress did flatter my body and it happened to be one of the few dresses in the style I was looking for. I didn't want a dress with a lot of layers. When a dress is thin, it is bound to show some imperfections. Your comment was rude. I didn't post on here for those kinds of comments. I posted for advice. If you have none to give, keep it to yourself.

    knottiedaeaf57357af8e46
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana
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    Why is there so much bride shaming going on? Maybe some of you ladies should keep your opinions to yourselves if you're just going to judge. I asked a simple question and much of what I'm getting in response is an attitude. Not sure why brides continue to post on here if these are the responses they get. Not at all helpful... 

    CMGragain - The dress did flatter my body and it happened to be one of the few dresses in the style I was looking for. I didn't want a dress with a lot of layers. When a dress is thin, it is bound to show some imperfections. Your comment was rude. I didn't post on here for those kinds of comments. I posted for advice. If you have none to give, keep it to yourself.

    No one was judging or bride shaming you they were trying to be helpful. CMG was making a comment about when she went dress shopping. Simmer down, the ladies on this forum can be very helpful. You just need to learn how things are done - and different personalities on here. You also can't dictate how people respond on a public forum.

    InLoveInQueensSTARMOON44
  • You think all of these comments were helpful? Telling me that you wouldn't look for a dress that exposed your lady lumps was helpful? If someone said that to your face, you wouldn't call it helpful. Don't tell me to simmer down.
  • You think all of these comments were helpful? Telling me that you wouldn't look for a dress that exposed your lady lumps was helpful? If someone said that to your face, you wouldn't call it helpful. Don't tell me to simmer down.
    Yeah I think that was pretty uncalled for TBH. 

    But it I was trying to be helpful with my slip comment; maybe try a slip over the shapewear or get a shapewear slip (https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00GD8T4WI/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1503072692&sr=8-4&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=knee+length+slip+shapewear&dpPl=1&dpID=411skLI8otL&ref=plSrch). 

    I do think most people were trying to be helpful (recs for things, longer shapewear, slips, etc.) 
    holyguacamole79ahoyweddingknottiedaeaf57357af8e46
  • Yes, you're slip comment was appreciated. Thank you. Unfortunately, it might need to be shorts because of how the dress is cut. That one you linked to looks pretty good! I'll check out the reviews :)

    Some of the comments were very helpful. Thank you to those ladies.
  • CMGragainCMGragain
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    edited August 18
    Well, OP, YOU are the one who brought up your "lady lumps".  I had never heard that term before.  Now you are worried about undergarments because of the dress you chose?  I don't get it.
    I hope you find something that pleases you.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana
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    You think all of these comments were helpful? Telling me that you wouldn't look for a dress that exposed your lady lumps was helpful? If someone said that to your face, you wouldn't call it helpful. Don't tell me to simmer down.
    FTR, It wasn't me who made the comment, but as CMG said, you are the one who brought up the lady lumps. I can tell you to simmer down because I think most of the posts were helpful - especially the ones about your color scheme and BM dresses.
  • OP I recommend waiting to see what the Dusty Lilac swatch from Weddington Way looks like. If that's still not the right shade, I recommend you go in a different color direction once you get budget information from each of your bridesmaids individually and privately. These are three major bridal stores - and if you can't find your color from any of them, you're going to make things extraordinarily difficult for yourself and your wedding party. 
    InLoveInQueens
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston
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    edited August 23
    Am I the only one with this song on repeat in my head?


    ETA:  @no_one_you_know , this was not meant to point out any physical flaws.  This was a (possibly poor) attempt to insert some humor and levity.



    Anniversary
    MesmrEweeileenrob
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston
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    Is lilac gray even a color? Lilac and gray are both separate colors. Maybe just pick one of them?
    I see there's a Pantone # / color there, but it may be hard to get that precise shade.  What about getting a muted grey and have lilac flowers?



    Anniversary
    InLoveInQueensSP29
  • I like that color, but PPs are right that it might be a little tricky to find. If you're okay with the mismatched look (it seems like you are from your first post), could you maybe find a few color options that are close and let your BMs choose something they like within that range? I would think maybe a paint store or an art supply store might be helpful to give you a few options, and would likely be familiar with Pantone. Varying shades of lilac to gray would look lovely together! Or I like the suggestion of light gray dresses, adding the lilac color in their flowers, and trying to incorporate this exact color you're looking for in some of the decor. 

    As far as the underwear, I second the VS seamless thongs! Most shapewear shorts do show the lines, even if they say they're seamless. I think it's just hard to make them end "subtly" and kind of blend into your legs. The other thing, which may not be possible and quite possibly expensive, would be to maybe ask a seamstress about adding another layer under the dress. You said it's form-fitting though, so this might be a long shot.
    charlotte989875
  • Would these possibly work if you cut the band down a lot? These were the closest I was able to find and the ones with the lowest band. Seriously,  on the day we are most likely to wear shape wear,  why are they all against the current dress trends? 

    https://m.herroom.com/rago-9240-tummy-shaping-capri-pant.shtml
  • SP29SP29
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    These "lady lumps" you speak of, I think you may be referring to your BODY- in which case, don't be afraid to show your natural curves. I think clothing items look unflattering if they are the wrong shape or cut, too tight, or have a thick seam that shows through. I am sure if you wore a seamless pair of underwear (the VS seamless underwear- either thong or brief- are really good) so there were no lines, you'd look fabulous.

    As for the dresses- beautiful colour, but I think you're going to have a hard time finding it. I agree that I would go with grey dresses and lilac coloured flowers.
  • Based on the description of your dress, I can understand your concern. My dress is also form fitting and one layer (silk with an overlay of very sheer lace). I was really concerned about the dress creasing in certain areas. My seamstress assured me that it is a natural phenomenon with this particular fit, shape wear, though helpful in some situations would only show through.  I agree with PP, seamless underwear is your best bet for a true no lines look. And as long as your undergarments are not sucking you in, then there is a small chance of "lady lumps" showing through. Good Luck!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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